Momo Stella / Comments

Momo Stella

Next up: Flowers on the Battlefield

If you're being forced to drop by (don't) or reading, please leave some feedback! I'm here to improve and please after all.

A big thanks to all who support me. May flowers bloom on every battlefield.

I like writing songs, stories, and novels and all sorts of arts. On the discord too if you want to talk. I'll gladly share my readingwriting opinions if requested.

registered at: Dec 26, 2025

Roles

Author

Badge

silver

What is Badge?

Achievements

What is an Achievement?

Report this user

Comments

aaa

Oct 05, 2026

To:Slow

Thanks Slow,

I think I'm understanding how you'd organize this part of the story, too.

Flowers on the Battlefield

Chapter:20

Oct 05, 2026

Miss Snowpoppy lore 🤩 is a nice addition.

Other than that, do these demons show up to catch her but as soon as they see her aura they start doubting their life choices? Why would they go so far in the first place? Have they never felt such power?

That's really the only question I have, everything else is great as usual.

From Empress to Commoner: The Former Demon Queen's Quest for a Peaceful Life Begins with Becoming a Hero

Chapter:25

Oct 05, 2026

Snowpoppy the skilled seamstress!

I actually don't have anything to say about this one which is probably a good sign, maybe.

She sits in her own sadness for enough time and then is saved unexpectedly both of which are well done and good choices in my opinion.

From Empress to Commoner: The Former Demon Queen's Quest for a Peaceful Life Begins with Becoming a Hero

Chapter:24

Oct 05, 2026

To:Slow

By the way I read this, I'm surprised your story was originally going to end soon after when there's lots more. I'm glad you took care of yourself though

From Empress to Commoner: The Former Demon Queen's Quest for a Peaceful Life Begins with Becoming a Hero

Chapter:22

Oct 04, 2026

To:Mara

I glad you like my choice of themes overcomplicating my idea of what heroes are. 😂

I think inevitably people so strong in an environment so dangerous inevitably hurt innocents and that might fade into the background. I think her facing it on a personal level is a difficult thing given how much general admiration and hatred Lullaby has.

It was one of my favorite chapters to write. Seemed like a good time to reveal what her comfort chant meant that can at the same time mean many things.

Who's the other author 🤩

Flowers on the Battlefield

Chapter:39

Oct 04, 2026

Oh, small pov note. Mary knows her age right, so I think when she describes Kokomeen she can be certain she's 15, without the need to say "she looked like". I think at least...

From Empress to Commoner: The Former Demon Queen's Quest for a Peaceful Life Begins with Becoming a Hero

Chapter:23

Oct 04, 2026

The whole Kokomeen scene really matched the mood you're going for of comedy and serious I think.

I'm glad the shadow is solved before it ran for too long.

A little more to be sympathetic towards Emilia too, I like that.

Goofy lore note. If nothing can grow on the demon lands does that mean all demons are carnivores? If so that would complicate her diet when trying to eat with her new friends. There's funny potential there.

The one thing I'm thinking is that Mary often seems pretty smart, but just now realizes her friends might be in danger? I guess nothing had really threatened them so closely until now (good escalation). Maybe she was so happy that she didn't want to think it either? That would be a very human way, to not see something you don't want to see. Worth considering if something like that would enhance Mary's reactions for a reader instead of just general shock, though you might add something like this in a further chapter.

It's been fun so far!

From Empress to Commoner: The Former Demon Queen's Quest for a Peaceful Life Begins with Becoming a Hero

Chapter:23

Oct 04, 2026

Alright at first I didn't know if the Miss Leafy training arc was going to be a main plot point but it seems like it is. It seems nice to have Mary watching over you.

I wonder how much a day of slime slaying is worth compared to their normal job.

Monica... silent magic... I get it.

Cute colorful slimes.

The only real note is that the spying thing has gone on for a bit and it would be nice if she can start at least researching what it is.

From Empress to Commoner: The Former Demon Queen's Quest for a Peaceful Life Begins with Becoming a Hero

Chapter:22

Oct 04, 2026

To:Mara

Yeah, I can see that.

Originally she was just overhearing, so I just left it as "could be anything" like the city.

Flowers on the Battlefield

Chapter:38

Oct 04, 2026

To:Mara

Yeah in my head when I read the bit about what being a hero meant in the prompt my head decided to complicate her heroism...

I'm glad you're enjoying the questions the text is creating. There's a lot of reasons why she could be left out. Or maybe it's Oberstein being Oberstein. 👀

Flowers on the Battlefield

Chapter:36

Oct 04, 2026

I don't have much to say for this one, it's a bit of a setup chapter. I think the connection with ch1 is well handled and so is the growing tension with the pursuit.

I was wondering since she first said it if the income would be a problem so it's nice that it's mentioned here. So the official title is just in name and she still doesn't have the money?

I wonder if her morning scene here should have another brief reminder of her morning routine, because the horn snapping is a pretty heartbreaking thing and the dragon eggs a fun gag in my opinion, though the chapter with the brief montage was probably a better candidate for that. Given that they're going into a dungeon, we might not see that for a while.

From Empress to Commoner: The Former Demon Queen's Quest for a Peaceful Life Begins with Becoming a Hero

Chapter:21

Oct 04, 2026

See in this chapter I think Mary is appropriately excited about being accepted and honestly I think Leafy knows more than she shows.

The architecture of these two chapters is just training sessions which aren't personally the most exciting but I do really really like the reminder that this whole lie is weighing on her. It would weigh on anyone, but especially to someone who doesn't like lying like Mary.

It also makes me wonder about the mechanics of this world. Is there newspaper or maps or even a geography class that would expose her fake hometown?

Good end of chapter to move the plot, and good job in general.

From Empress to Commoner: The Former Demon Queen's Quest for a Peaceful Life Begins with Becoming a Hero

Chapter:20

Oct 04, 2026

A nice training sequence. I notice the subtle reminder that Mary is still balancing out her secret identity, noted for my story...

I think the training is cute but if I HAD to pick apart something maybe it goes in a bit too much detail about the sword. I personally like it and don't mind it but I think it makes its point faster than that (Mary is a knowledgeable and kind teacher).

There's also the fact that the sword basics and stuff need some research, because they more detail you go into that topic the more the risk of a knowledgeable reader saying something might be wrong. I assume you did it and most readers won't really think about it but worth thinking when going into detail for any skill.

It's mostly nitpick tier for this specific chapter though.

And if I had to extend something, Mary could celebrate her official acceptance to the guild a bit more since I feel like that's a huge deal for her (maybe I'm getting too into thinking like her) and here is kinda sandwiched in between two training sequences. I just think it would be cuter since she tends to really be happy about these small moments of acceptance.

From Empress to Commoner: The Former Demon Queen's Quest for a Peaceful Life Begins with Becoming a Hero

Chapter:19

Oct 04, 2026

This chapter does a pretty good job to make us sympathize with Emilia so she's less of a cartoon villain and her next confrontation will be a lot more interesting. That's the main goal and it's still executed in my opinion.

I like the introduction of vampires and spiders though a little cliche that they're on the "evil" side.

A question on demon ruling mechanics. Is there only one ruling Queen and would they rule alongside their uncle? If so, would she have to marry the uncle 😳

From Empress to Commoner: The Former Demon Queen's Quest for a Peaceful Life Begins with Becoming a Hero

Chapter:18

Oct 04, 2026

To:Mara

I agree, also, what a well thought out picture of a character like that...

And I'm glad you're following, I think it's interesting to see two writers pick their stories apart like a mini writer group. I feel like there's a lot to learn here for anyone that would want to... or maybe I'm just weird for finding it interesting.

Flowers on the Battlefield

Chapter:18

Momo Stella

Novels

Gallery

Comments

Reviews

aaa