| Synapse, Pt. 1 |

The nighttime lights of the Underside burned Arufa’s retinas. Neon flashes, harsh sirens, faint gunshots. Her senses were dulled as she looked out to the looming horizon, the border between here and a better place.

“I’m hungry,” Skyler mumbled behind her. The two had been hiding in an old, ruined parking garage floating high above the city—they’d had no food or water for the past twelve hours.

“What the hell do you want me to do about it?”

“Let’s go home. The cops can’t seriously be searching anymore.”

“Say that all you want. You get seen, they kill you on sight. I’d rather die up here than down there.”

Arufa’s stomach growled at her, a desperate cry for something, anything. But it was far too dangerous—she smothered its pleas with her thoughts.

What happened earlier is weighing heavy on me. It’s hard to think with a clear head without a clear conscience. But I’ve always chosen logic over my feelings, and that won’t change just because I accidentally killed some folks.

Well, it wasn’t an accident. I shot them with the nail gun I’m holding. But I didn’t think they were humans. We don’t have human officers in Underside—how was I supposed to know?

She turned her head to Skyler, who was curled up in the corner, clutching their knees and rocking back and forth. They’re probably imagining a three-course meal. Not that we’ll ever have one of those, now that we’re outlaws.

Part of me wants to stay up here until we both starve. The view is pretty, and it’s probably better than living life in prison or getting shot. But I know eventually we’ll have to go back. I probably already would have, actually—except our AG’s a flat zero, and that’s a hella long drop.

“Rufa?” Skyler called, their voice meek.

“Hey.”

“I feel awful.”

“This sucks, yeah.”

“No, about the cops,” they said. “They didn’t want to kill us. And we murdered them.”

“…” She closed her eyes and read out exactly what happened all over again. Each page of her mind’s book piled on her grief.

“They had lives.”

“Sky, I– I’m gonna need you to stop talking. I already broke down once.”

“I’m sorry,” they said.

“You’re okay.”

I’ve been thinking about this for half a day now, but I just don’t get it. How did that broadcast come up before we killed those officers? And… why? There are a few possible scenarios here.

One. Skyler was right. They put that warrant out to threaten us into submission. I stole that wallet yesterday, and I remember talking to a policeman about it. We just coincidentally did exactly what it said.

Two. The warrant was from the future, somehow. It seems stupid, and time travel definitely isn’t possible—but if we assume it is, then everything lines up. Our fate, to kill those cops, was predetermined by that message.

I don’t think either of those are right. The chances of the former are essentially zero—a coincidence like that has astronomical odds. Plus, why would a police station lie to everyone about their chief dying?

And the latter is a bootstrap paradox. The warrant never would have been created had we not killed those officers—but we only killed them because of the warrant. There’s a chance I’m just thinking about it wrong, but again, I’m also pretty sure time travel isn’t real.

So, our only real option is this: three. The police station heard the crime had happened before it did, and innocently put up our warrant. When we saw it, we wound up committing the crime that the police station had already heard about. The only issue is, how did the police station hear about the crime before it happened?

The X2 Monument stood brightly at the center of her vision. She saw smoke rising a few blocks down the road, a police chase a bit further off; Underside was a nightmare. The flashy lights and graffiti gave her a migraine.

I wish I were that Marsia girl, living in an estate on the Overside. Things would be so much simpler up there.

“Skyler, you remember those two Oversiders we tried to rob?”

“The ones that slowed down time?”

“Yeah, them.”

I haven’t said anything about this tattoo on my chest. Skyler hasn’t pointed it out; I don’t think they’ve noticed it. I always end up forgetting about it, though. Why hasn’t that happened yet?

She steeled herself and asked. “Do you remember if they had the same pattern on their chests as we do?”

“What pattern?”

This again…! It doesn’t matter how many times I point it out—we always forget. And when we forget… it disappears?

“The one right here!” She pointed to her sternum. The purple mark was still there, but its glow began to fade. She felt her thoughts slipping, as if dangling off a cliff. “I think we can only see them when we know they exist!”

Skyler shrugged, still curled up. “Are you going crazy again?”

“Doesn’t matter! Do you have anything to write with?”

“Stole a pen off one of the dead cops, before we knew they were real. Do you want it?”

“Please! C’mon, it’s fading!”

They sluggishly plucked the pen out of their pocket and rolled it to her. “Have fun.”

“Oh god, please don’t forget…” Arufa snatched it up and held it to the back of her left hand; she tried to decide what she would write, to no avail. “Don’t forget… what? What was I just talking about, Sky?”

“I dunno. Whatever it was, it wasn’t food.”

A gust blew through the floating rubble, sending Arufa’s hair astray. She was plagued with a dismay she could not decipher. Her breathing was quick and sparse, her pulse like the footsteps of a frenzied animal.

With a glance behind her, she found a railway rocketing into the sky, glowing purple tracks guiding its path. Stray railways were not at all uncommon in Underside—hijackings happened often. Especially if it was the line she thought it was.

That was where that wind came from. But… what was I doing again? Did I get distracted by the tram?

She stared at the pen in her hand. She couldn’t remember why she was holding it. Which, in itself, might have meant something. I must have been trying to write something down. But what?

I’m in such a panic right now, but I’m not sure why. It’s like I was racing against the clock to write it down—but I don’t know what ‘it’ is. Maybe… maybe I knew I would forget. But how would I know?

This isn’t the first time I’ve forgotten something out of nowhere. Back at the warehouse, I forgot about something with the police officer. Maybe it has to do with the police?

I remember seeing the warrant and noticing it was off. I know it wasn’t the murder charge that messed with me, though. Was it our pictures? And the time at the warehouse, the officer showed me footage of myself. It must have to do with pictures of ourselves.

Then it’s something on us, right? And the warrant only had bust shots. Which means whatever’s eluding me must be on my face or my chest. And my chest has red lines like I’ve scratched at—holy shit! The tattoo!

“Skyler, I remember now! The tattoos!”

“Good for you…”

Arufa uncapped the pen and scribbled on the palm of her left hand. Concentrated entirely on writing, she barely even thought. When she lifted the pen’s tip off her skin, she was only more confused.

In a frantic scrawl, she had only written the words ‘don’t forget’.

…Don’t forget what?

She shifted her focus to the skyline, pulsating as if a colorful inferno ran through the streets. Its glow reminded her of something, but she couldn’t place it. “I want answers.”

“To what?” they said.

“Just—everything.”

“…I don’t follow.”

Arufa sighed. “I want to know how everything works. I want some kind of structure. But there’s nothing. Not here in Underside. And I’m up here freaking out about something I can’t even remember!”

“Just go with the flow. You don’t need structure.”

“Maybe you’re right. But I don’t like how I feel right now. And I definitely don’t like the idea of living as a criminal until the day I die.”

She kicked a piece of cracked concrete off the edge, watching it tumble into the abyss. Her eyelids were made of lead; her stomach clawing at her insides. Tears fell where she’d already dried them—she almost considered taking the leap herself.

“I want a way out, Sky.”

“I get it.”

The two stayed silent a little longer, listening to the soft howl of the wind through the artificial night sky. It was a somber moment—hungry, lonely, and just the slightest bit afraid of their future.

Arufa felt a quiet rhythmic pulse, a steady beat to the chaos of the Underside. It grew, louder, louder still, until she recognized it was behind her. She drew her head around to face Skyler.

But she nearly fell backwards when she met another face. Still a ways away, but close enough to pose a threat, a man approached wearing a government uniform and black sunglasses. He carried what Arufa could only assume to be weaponry on his belt.

“Just get it over with,” she said.

The man smiled and shook his head. “I didn’t mean to startle you, Arufa.”

On edge, she gripped the nail gun in her right hand. “Who are you?”

“I’m not with the police, if that’s what you mean.”

He glanced at Skyler, who was fast asleep on the asphalt. He brushed his blonde hair back and adjusted his tie.

“So you’re a vigilante?”

“No. My name is Agent Ghiles. I’m here to offer you a choice.”