She Can Never Go Home

Now with a pair of glasses in tow, Himeko turned to Dr. Nakamura. They were in a small apparel shop nestled in the corner of the subway. Every inch of its dark wooden interior was aglow from amber lighting and static-filled jazz from a time even before her era played from the gramophone-style speakers.

“Are you sure this is alright?” she asked, holding out the glasses. Round and black, they had a sort-of antique feel to them, and a price tag almost befitting that. “I don’t have any money of my own.”

“If I were worried about that, Himeko, I wouldn’t have resurrected you, nor would we be here right now. Get what you like. I promise you I have more than enough to cover anything your heart desires.” Dr. Nakamura explained, clearly exasperated if a little bemused by her need for constant reassurance. He hadn’t reacted once to the objectively large amount of items Himeko had picked out from just this store alone.

“Uwah...if you say so.” She mumbled before placing everything-and it really felt like everything in the store-on the counter. The cashier giggled as Himeko finished, delicately removing tags and hangers as she rang it all up. She gingerly placed everything into a few bags as Dr. Nakamura paid.

“The two of you remind me of my dad and I when I was younger,” the cashier laughed, handing the bags to Himeko. “Don’t run up your dad’s card too much now~”

“I’m not-we’re-not…” Himeko began to protest before giving up with a sigh. “Thank you.”

“Come again soon!” The cashier grinned, waving them out.

Dr. Nakamura frowned in deep contemplation as he led Himeko to their platform, wordlessly handing her his card so she could buy a steam pork bun for them both as they waited for their train. He didn't speak again until they’d boarded.

“Himeko,” he began, clearly distraught. “Do I really look that old?”

“No, but you do look older than me. Then again, I did die when I was nineteen. How old are you, Dr. Nakamura?”

“I couldn't be your dad. I’m only thirty-two.” He nearly wept, his head in his hands.

“Oh, really? I thought you were younger.”

“Thank goodness,” Dr. Nakamura mumbled in a way that reminded Himeko of a sopping wet cat. “I’m not doomed yet.”

Himeko chuckled, patting him on the head twice as the train chimed and began to move. “Don’t worry, Dr. Nakamura. You’re still young and handsome.”

“You’re acting like my grandmother.”

This made her giggle. “I sort of am in a way, aren’t I?” She ruffled Dr. Nakamura’s short brown hair, playing into it. “Remember to eat your vegetables and mind your Granny Himeko.”

“Stop it, stop it; I’ve had enough!” He groaned, burying his head further into his hands.

“Just because you don't feel like listening doesn't mean my words aren't being said!”

Dr. Nakamura laughed, wiping his eyes as he picked his head up and leaned back in his seat. His shoulders slumped in relief. “Ah, I’ve never seen a better impression of a granny. Thank you. You’ve really made me feel better.”

“Hehe, anything for my grandson~”

✦✦✦

Dr. Nakamura’s neighborhood was a pleasant place full of winding streets that led over and around low hills, flowering trees, and children playing on every corner. It was only a stone’s throw from the beach and its pier, and the sounds of the waves crashing into sand and the pier buzzing with activity followed them as they stepped into Dr. Nakamura’s fenced-in yard. A carved-out piece of earth was beneath a cherry tree, a single pink blossom sitting in its center. Himeko reached down to pick it up, dusted it off, and looked back at Dr. Nakamura with an eyebrow raised. He looked embarrassed.

“That’s going to be a fishpond. It’s not done yet. Obviously.” he said before continuing in a much softer voice, his embarrassment dispelled. “I’m sorry I didn’t wake you up in time to see the flowers bloom.”

“That’s okay. I got to see this last one, didn’t I? And I can always see them next year, yes?”

“Yes. We’ll go together next year. They bloom most beautifully at…Zaiyabōto Park.”

That gave Himeko pause. It seemed like her influence posthumously didn’t just stop at awards. “...Was that park originally named Higanbana?”

“It was.”

“Every day I would visit that park and watch the birds since it was right next to my house,” Himeko let out a little laugh-like puff of air, recalling the memories fondly. She looked at Dr. Nakamura, brushing her long dark hair out of her face and squinting as she smiled so she didn’t cry. “But the Higanbana Park I loved is gone now, my house I loved isn’t mine anymore, and I’m the only living person of my family, and I’m hardly alive.” She sighed, holding her elbow. Her fingers cradled the soft, dying cherry blossom. “Can we go inside now, Dr. Nakamura?”

“Of course, Himeko.” He replied, and she looked away, back at where she’d picked up the flower. Was pity supposed to hurt this much?

Dr. Nakamura unlocked the door of his house and let them inside. It was pleasantly cold, and Himeko was relieved that it was a little warmer inside than out. Yes, “her” mind and the minds of her fellows had helped not only solve but reverse climate change, but the world was so much colder than she remembered!

An undisturbed silence filled the air, and the heels of the scientist’s loafers thumped audibly against the tile before he slipped them off, sliding them into place in a squat wooden rack full of cubes to put shoes in by the door. Dr. Nakamura slipped his coat off, hanging it up on the wall, and pointed at the empty side of the rack. “Here, Himeko: you can put your shoes in here.”

Dutifully, she did as he said, wiggling her clothed toes against the tile as she waited. They were cold, even more than outside! She squeaked. Dr. Nakamura chuckled, and with one flick of his wrist, the house brightened up with artificial and warm light.

They stood in the foyer and a short and mostly empty hallway led into the rest of the house. Only a few photographs - ones that moved! - made the walls not empty. She only recognized the scientist, Dr. Tsuru, and Hanami in them. The rest she guessed were Dr. Nakamura’s family and other colleagues.

A gentle, distant voice not unlike her own in the cube flickered into existence. “Welcome home, Kōji. I see you have a guest. Would you like to register them in the home system?”

“This is Himeko Zaiyabōto. She’ll be living with us from now on. Please add her as a registered member of the household.” Dr. Nakamura said.

The home system paused, stuttering as it replied, “A-affirmative. Would you like me to request an update of address to city hall’s records?”

“Sure. Go ahead and do that.” The home system confirmed the action and said nothing more, though Himeko could still feel its presence hum above, ready to respond. Dr. Nakamura, his expression confused and contemplative, motioned for her to follow him. “Feel free to use Charlotte, the smart home system, as much as you want. It feels almost limitless in what it can do. I imagine they weren't so advanced back in your day.”

Himeko nodded, following him down the hall. “They could do simple things, like turn on the lights.”

“Must be quite the shock to you, then.”

Himeko silently agreed, though with an addendum: everything was a shock.

Dr. Nakamura showed her where everything on the bottom floor was before ascending the stairs. Plush carpet covered them, and static danced between it and Himeko’s socks. The banister was made of hard light. Four-pointed hologram stars danced over it, falling and vanishing in Himeko’s hands like impermanent rain, and Dr. Nakamura showed her how to change the effect.

“You should choose one,” he said, swiping through them. He swiped so fast Himeko could hardly see as the cycle looped. “To celebrate your new life.”

“But it's your home.” Himeko insisted.

“Your home now as well.”

Eventually, after a few minutes of this back and forth, they were able to settle on changing the effect to opalescent bubbles-just for the night, though. They both laughed and popped bubbles. Himeko gasped when she could feel them burst on her skin, the sticky film that they left behind, and even smell a faux-rain and soapy scent.

“Wow,” she breathed out, looking at Dr. Nakamura with wide fascination. “Everything’s changed so much.”

Leading her up the stairs, he showed her everything the second floor had to offer - his bedroom and a bathroom - before stopping in front of two doors at the end of the hall. “You can choose either as your room, though if you want the one on the left, you’ll have to wait a few days for us to move it since it’s my office right now.”

“No, that's alright. The one that isn't an office is fine!” Said Himeko, shaking her head.

“Are you sure-?”

“-Yes, absolutely, Dr. Nakamura! I’ve already inconvenienced you so much; I can't possibly ask you to do that.”

He shook his head, opening both doors. “Himeko, this is your home now. It's no inconvenience to make it comfortable for you, but if you really are okay with it, then the guest room’s your room now.”

She took a quick peak inside the leftmost door of the two, the one that led to the middle room. It was a simple, clean office, and Charlotte’s voice greeted her as light filled it. “Greetings, Himeko. Is there anything I can do for you?”

“No, Charlotte, but thank you.” she replied, shutting the door. The lights turned off a second later, and Himeko still couldn't shake the feeling that she recognized the voice as she rejoined the scientist.

“This is usually the room Dr. Tsuru and Hanami stay in when they come over,” Dr. Nakamura explained. “So, it’s already ready for you to sleep in.”

“I can sleep?”

“I figured you would rather sleep for your energy than plug yourself up to a wall.”

Himeko laughed and opened the door. “You’re right.”

Like the rest of Dr. Nakamura’s house, this room was made of clean white lines and was as chilly as the rest of the house. A queen-sized bed with white linens occupied most of the leftmost corner and a long mirror was hung behind the door. A tall but empty dresser sat across from the bed, and Himeko put her bags down there before walking further in, her footsteps light, and gasping. Her room had a balcony.

Not only was it a balcony, it already had a table and chair and faced the sea, the late afternoon breeze wafting the salty smell over her. Part of the pier too was visible from it, though not the amusement park, but that didn’t matter to her. It was all so beautiful and all for her and Himeko loved it, looking at Dr. Nakamura with big, “teary” eyes.

She’d never be able to express her gratitude to him, for everything from her new chance at life to his continued generosity, and so she, in a way she never would have when she was first alive, buried her face into her ball-jointed hands to hide her face. Something wet slipped into the spaces between her joints and Himeko opened her eyes, feeling them wet with tears.

She lowered her hands and stared at Dr. Nakamura in disbelief. He’d given her functioning tear ducts.

“Thank you for everything.” Himeko said after she recovered a few minutes later.

“Of course. Let me know if you need anything.” Dr. Nakamura left the room, closing the door behind him as he did.

Himeko flopped onto the bed, sinking into its cloud-like comforter. Her eyes fluttered shut, and she took off her glasses, holding them between her clasped hands. The waves in the distance crashed into the shore, almost but not quite masking the low hum of Charlotte.

Opening her eyes, Himeko reached for the ceiling. “‘You’re’ watching me, aren’t you?”

Charlotte responded, though the AI’s voice was a distant echo beneath “her” own. “I am. Does it bother you?”

“Would it have bothered the old me?”

“‘I’ am not asking ‘me.’ I am asking you.”

Himeko thought for a second. “Then I guess it does bother me. I don’t want to be watched in my room.”

There was a hint of mirth in the cube’s voice as it spoke. “We’ve changed, then. That makes me happy. I will only come here when you ask for me. Farewell, Himeko.” Her voice slowly faded away, and Charlotte’s echoed around the room. “Greetings, Himeko. Is there anything I can do for you?”

“No, Charlotte.”

“Goodnight then, Himeko.”

“Goodnight.” Said Himeko, curling into herself beneath the shield of a blanket as her pillow was dampened by tears.