Chapter 309:

There was a cat that really was gone

En Passant Grandmaster

A new air of tension seemed to sweep through the hall as all eyes turned to the sole remaining game. Unlike all the other opponents, this woman was not afraid, in fact her smug grin was saying she had this in control.

Muazzez Başak was her name. More commonly known my her nickname, Zzez, she hailed from Türkiye but had a Russian mother, making her half-Turkish, half-Russian. She had her hands in many pies; commentator, streamer, journalist, and librarian were just the most notable ones. Women's international master was another title she held, with grandmaster ultimately in her sights.

She had also just recently added "bald fetishist" to her resume as she had her head, eyebrows, and eyelashes all shaved, waxed, and lasered off, mere hours before she left for Budapest. Her reason for doing so baffled all her close friends, teamates, and twin sister, but clearly she had her reasons. Reasons Rasputin seemed to be aware of as his glare just wouldn't seem to leave as he stared at his reflection on Muazzez's shiny bald head while moving his pawn to d4.

"Pretty impressive right? I went to the best of the best, and had em shave me balder than bald," Muazzez smirked as she moved her bishop to b4.

"So you mixed into the flock," Rasputin snarled as he moved his bishop to d2.

"Yeah, and now it's bald woman vs hairy man. Neo-future woman vs neanderthal man. A battle of sexes, eras, and hair volume. And this girlboss bout to win. You got arrogant and played the Kádas, and now just like in that one spy movie, your ass bout to be beat by a girl!" Muazzez grinned as she captured the knight at c3 with her bishop.

Rasputin simply stared in silence while capturing the bishop at c3 with his bishop.

"I know, I know, the peak femininity emanating from dis bad bitch be too powerful, but sorry, only a woman can tame the Zezz, in life and in bed," Muazzez smirked as she uncrossed her legs, adjusted her glasses, stood up and stomped her sneaker down for dramatic effect in perfect timing with the lightning before moving her knight to e7 and pulling out one of her ear pods so Rasputin could hear the song she was vibbing to.

"Muazzez Başak... Are you trying to steal MY thunder?" Rasputin snarled as he captured the pawn at e5 with his d-pawn.

"Fuck yes I'm stomping you back under the ice! I blasted this lit song as they shaved me bald, and it made me... 100 TIMES MORE BADASS!" Muazzez declared as she castled king's side and pulled a can of shaving cream out of her suitcoat pocket, lathering her entire head and face with shaving cream, without even bothering to take her glasses off.

"And are you trying to seduce me!? I thought you were into women!" Rasputin laughed as he moved his rook to c1.

Muazzez smiled and flipped off Rasputin. "When a sexy, peak femininity girlboss goddess like myself lathers her head with shaving cream, she's doing it to hype herself up. But if you jazzing your pants causes you to run out of time, jerk off, punk. I'm here to kick your ass, one way or the other," she declared as she moved her pawn to a5 and began gracefully scrapping the shaving cream off her perfectly smooth head and face with her fingernails while lighting flashed.

As Rasputin moved his bishop to d4, all the defeated combatants watched with hope in their eyes that Muazzez would win.

"I'll date you if you win or whatever! So don't fuck this up!" Inez shouted giving increased vigor to Muazzez as she moved her queen to e6.

"Screw you, ya sasquatch molester! Kick his ass, girl!" Zabel shouted as Rasputin scowled and moved his knight to g5.

"I'll date you too! So win!" Justin cried, causing Muazzez to scowl in disgust as she moved her queen to g6.

"Ugh, don't need YOUR cheering, ya mop bucket pissing asshole."

"Slay him, girl! Mizuse has your back!" Collette shouted as Rasputin gritted his teeth and moved his pawn to e3.

"One baldie to another, kick his ass!" Sommer cheered as Muazzez smiled and moved her pawn to h6.

"Fight, Muazzez! Beat Rasputin!" Meisa cheered as Rasputin moved his bishop to d3.

"You're our only hope, finish what we started!" Lieke shouted as Muazzez moved her knight to f5.

"Don't let this scourge subject us to starvation, beat him!" Evangelia shouted as Rasputin clicked his tongue and moved his pawn to g4.

"This queen, doesn't approve of this man! By royal decree, banish him!" Jadwiga shouted as Muazzez captured the knight at g5 with her h-pawn.

"Yeah, fuck this guy!" Glaiza shouted as Rasputin captured the pawn at g5 with his h-pawn.

"You're better than me at this. You got it!" Agneta cheered as Muazzez moved her queen to h6.

"I'm regrettably entrusting it all to you, so-called "Zzez". Don't mess this up," Ethelreda huffed as Rasputin captured the pawn at c7 with his rook.

"Don't worry, I won't," Muazzez smirked as she vibbed to the music and slammed her rook down on d8.

"MUAZZEZ! MUAZZEZ!" everyone chanted as Rasputin let out a frustrated roar while moving his queen to b3.

"You hear the ladies, bald guy, and mop bucket pissing asshole? They want da Zzez, not the Rasp," Muazzez smirked as she moved her pawn to a4 and smacked her head just as the lightning flashed.

Rasputin continued to seethe with fury, and moved his queen to d5 as Muazzez continued to exude confidence and captured the pawn at h4 with her g-pawn. But most unsettlingly, Ayane was smiling from ear to ear, as she stared at the state of the board. "Oh it's so close, Ayane's que will be up soon," she thought as Rasputin moved his pawn to e6.

Vesna, who had snapped out of her daze also saw the state of things and stared in horror as everyone cheered Muazzez on and continued to do so as she moved her pawn to a3.

"... WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU ALL!? THAT'S MATE IN 7!"

Lightning flashed and thunder crackled as the music stopped and everyone went silent.

Muazzez blinked and stared at the board and as she did so, Rasputin captured the pawn at f7 with his e-pawn.

"Check... Now, what does my face say?"

The way Rasputin said that line sent a chill down Muazzez's spine. She moved her king to h7 and slowly looked up, only to shriek in terror at Rasputin's demonic smile.

"It says the act is over!" Rasputin declared as he moved his pawn to f6 and clapped his hands.

Ayane smiled and did a backflip before resuming her singing as Muazzez frantically moved her pawn to g6.

"Ра-ра-Распутин, гигантская танцующая сила, он растоптал шахматный мир [Ra-ra-Rasputin, giant dancing powerhouse, he stomped upon the chess world]!" Ayane sang as Rasputin gleefully moved his queen to e4.

Muazzez was now completely dejected as her hand began to tremble. "Fuck, were we all getting overhyped? Fucking bastard," she thought as she clenched her fist and moved her queen to h5.

After queen captures g6, check, it didn't matter what Muazzez did as mate was inevitable, but she at least mustered the strength to capture the queen at g6 with her queen. "And just like your namesake, you use the queen as your bitch... heh, hah, hahahaha."

Tears poured down Muazzez's face as she laughed and watched as Rasputin captured the pawn at h4 with his rook, winning the game.

"Checkmate! 13 have fallen, faced with starvation, yet the one remaining could turn it all around," Rasputin declared as he turned to face Vesna.

All Vesna's fear was now gone, replaced with rage. Rage similar to what she had felt when she first challenged him after he first appeared before her, offering a boutique of her comrade's shrunken heads as a "gift".

"You manipulate people with your putrid bodily fumes. This time, I'll put you down for good."

The full game:

White: Rasputin Vasilyevich (2802) Black: Muazzez Başak (2269)

1. h4 e5

2. c4 d5

3. cxd5 Qxd5

4. Nc3 Qc6

5. Nf3 Nd7

6. d4 Bb4

7. Bd2 Bxc3

8. Bxc3 Ne7

9. dxe5 O-O