"Sakura Trees"

Neo-Neon Tokyo, the city of dreams. For a thousand years, Japan has remained an important element in the Western psyche - and later human psyche, once humanity expanded across the stars and East vs West became less important than Earth vs Mars. The concept of the engineering megastructure had been perfected in Neo-Neon Tokyo - from up in the night sky as the Solar Sail descended, Zipper saw the famed Ten Pyramids that ringed Neo-Neon Bay. These gigantic structures were self-sustained arcologies of the highest order, each boasting populations of millions within their A-Polymer walls. Along with hundreds of starscrapers, the Tokyo of 2999 resembled a blinking, swirling galaxy of blue, pink, red, and green city lights emitted by the Plutonian Ice-9 lighting system designed to resemble neon of the old days.

Amid massive, dancing hologram projections of virtual idols, spotlights swinging in the sky behind them, the Solar Sail landed at an airstrip located on the 700th floor of Ku-Pyramid. The lights of a hundred billion windows in a hundred million skyscrapers gazed down upon them as the Dime Boys stepped off the craft.

“Sugoi!” Magenta Sue ejaculated as she rose from kissing Japanese ground. “Glorious, thousand-folded, land of Nippon!”

A red-faced Sue dragged Zipper and Nat behind her, exclaiming “Hayaku! Hayaku!” all the while, knocking over a pack of pregnant women along the way to the subway station on the 700th floor.

Aboard the train, Sue rocked Zipper’s shoulders until her eyes were doing spirals in their sockets. “This is just like a Japanimation! Sugoi, sugoi!”

The vactrain traveled smoothly over the city, over neat streets, Torii gates, karaoke bars, parks, other vactrains. Sue slammed Zipper’s face into the window. “Look! Mite! We’re passing by a school! Oh, the rooftop looks just like they do in the cartoons!”

“Golly,” muttered a cross-eyed Zipper.

A panting Sue raised her hands toward Nat as the train passed over an absolutely sugoi konbini, an even sugoi-er train crossing (“even the noise sounds like the cartoons!”), and sugoi-est of all: “Maid Row! Look, a maid cafe! A cat cafe! A muscle mommy cafe-”

Nat slapped her.

Sue collected herself. “Thanks. I needed that.”

Her collection would last for approximately 10 seconds until they got off at their station, when Sue kissed the ground once more, and saw-

“Sugoi! A real-life Japanese person!”

Zipper and Nat shared a glance, but Sue already embraced the man. He was the older side, gray-haired and gray-bearded, eyes perpetually closed (if this was a Japanimation, that is). He was power-washing the space in front of what must’ve been his store.

“Excuse me! I mean, sumimasen, ojii-san!”

Sue didn’t give the man a chance to react. “Are they true? Are the wonderful tales from your ancient land and people true? Do you really have tsunderes, kuuderes, derederes, danderes, yanderes, meganekkos, bokukkos, tomboys, femboys, cat-boys, cat-girls, dog-girls, fox-girls, gyaru-girls, ship-girls, magic girls, clumsy girls, genki girls, flat girls, busty girls, cute girls, cute girls doing cute things, school idols, virtual idols, gothic lolis, vampire lolis, that one copy-pasted school design, literature clubs, light music clubs, going home clubs, student councils, culture festivals, class representatives, Christmas cake teachers, Japanese Christmas for that matter, Golden Week, Obon festivals, goldfish scooping, temples, shrines, shrine maidens, hikkimori, delinquents, sarashi, school uniforms, sailor-fuku, long skirts, short skirts, Absolute Territory, baggy socks, ninjas, samurai, ronin, office ladies, salarymen, Koshien, mangaka, otaku, yakuza, yaoi, yuri, harems, isekai, chuunibyou, moe, gap moe, doujins, baka, kawaii, mechas, senpais, kouhais, imoutos, onii-chans, nee-chans, nee-sans, onee-samas, ojous, otokonokos, ojii-sans, train-robbers, bank-robbers, ass-kickers, shit-kickers, and Anime Catholics?!”

The man looked at her for a long while. He spoke slowly, so she’d understand.

“Anime was a mistake.”

==========

“Ah, don’t be so glum, chum,” said Zipper as a crestfallen Sue and yawning Nat stood before Starlight Cafe, the epicenter of the Do-Nothing scene in West Tokyo. If rumors were to be believed, then this cafe had existed for over a thousand years now. Japanese things tended to do that, whether it be video game consoles, temples, or cell phones. The cafe had expanded over the years from a simple izakaya to its modern set-up: the traditional izakaya set-up, but with two (2) extra tables! Between that and fifteen additional floors, it could serve a growing scene like the Do-Nothings.

Sue brightened up at the sight of the faux neon. “You’re right. I’m in Neo-Neon Tokyo, there’s no reason to be upset!”

“Exactly,” said Zipper, “But make sure to be on your best behavior in there, ‘cuz these are intellectuals we’re talking to-”

Sue had already barged in through the wooden door. “Oi oi oi, Magenta Sue-desu!”

Zipper sighed and followed Sue inside. Even after a thousand years, the walls, counter, chairs, and two tables were all wooden, as were the stairs that led up to the additional floors. Boisterous laughter drifted from above as college groups celebrated the end of midterms. The izakaya was quite warm, a doe-eyed chef smiling at them behind the counter. Two women wearing suits and ties, same as the Dime Boys, sat around a nearby table. Being in a new place and all, Zipper felt pretty tense at first, but the coziness of the cafe worked its magic on her. 

“Irasshaimase!” said the chef, standing tall, dressed in a red kimono, long black hair down to her lower back, beaming at the newcomers.

Every Brain Implant came with a Universal Translator. Sue could speak in English, and the chef's Translator would automatically convert it into Japanese. Yet Sue spoke in her Japanimation Japanese anyway. 

"Daijoubu!" she exclaimed, pointing at pictures on the menu. "Naruhodo!"

Minutes later, the first of many beers arrived, with Sue taking a long opening swig, finally coming up for air with a relieved, “Aaaaaaaaaaahh!”

Nat, meanwhile, peered at the “Do It Yourself” pufferfish Sue had ordered for her.

Zipper housed her sake, sushi, sashimi, rice. She then glanced at the chef. “Uhhh…intellectuals…dozo?”

The chef nodded in the direction of the two suited women at the other table. Intellectuals, no doubt about it. Those two were Do-Nothings, smart ones at that. They probably went to college, practiced calculus in their spare time, and danced in ballrooms (or whatever else they did in college). Hell, they probably had intellectual names, names that belonged on the covers of classic literature. Not a name like Zipper Chute, which belonged in an amateur web novel at best.

But Zipper wanted to improve, so she was gonna join them. She mustered her courage-

Then turned back to the chef. "Umm...one more beer, desu...need a little more confidence first..."