Suddenly shoujo

Hello, my name is Momo. Momo Akasegawa. You can call me Momo-chan, if you're a hot guy, idiot...

Today, I'm about to meet some boys at a mixer. We've only interacted online via chats and forums, so I've never seen their faces, or heard their voices. My heart is throbbing with angst. For such an occasion, I naturally wore my finest dress, second only to the wedding dress, which was packed neatly in my Designer Femfire brand purse, tee hee.

My wingwomen, Ivy and Akane had done such a nice job picking out my outfit, even offering to come by and watch the interactions with the boys from afar, all in the name of my happiness.

Arriving at the diner, I slowly strutted in. My heels allowed me to peer over all the tables, spotting Akane and Ivy, huddled close together in masks and trench coats. Various other patrons caught my eye, but my primary focus was on the table illuminated by the most sunlight. There sat three hunks of men, radiating more beautifully than the sunlight shining down upon them.

I was nervous, those three were definitely my friends from online, and by the end of today, one was going to become my soulmate. My face was beginning to turn red, steam emitting from my ears, but I bared with it as I strutted for the table.

"H- Hello. I'm Momo. M- Momo Akasegawa," I stuttered as I reached the three.

They all looked at me, each smiling, both putting me at ease, but at the same time sending my heart off to the races. Taking a seat, I first turned towards the hunk seated to the left of center. He wore black suspender pants with no shirt, showcasing the chiseled abs that were making me drool. Looking further up was a feminine face lathered in goth makeup, framed by a glistening bob topped with a beret.

"Ey, my name is Bobby. You wanna be my girl?"

His voice was semi-deep, but deep enough to melt me like chocolate.

My eyes next wandered to the hunk in the center, a beautiful man with perfectly tanned skin and an air of royalty around him.

"My name is Nadir. I won't let you escape my sights. I love you. Let us be off to my palace," he smiled, blasting a round of arrows through my maiden heart.

I then turned my view towards the final hunk, a large man with short curly blonde hair clad in a Greek toga and laurel wreath.

"I'm Ando. Andon, the great. I'd love to make you, my great wife," the blonde hunk smiled.

My heart would only beat faster as the hunks smiled upon me. Oh, they're all so perfect, how can I choose one? No, no, no, Don't be greedy. There's one for me, Ivy, and Akane. Once I make my choice, I should call those two over.

"Now, now, you all need to order something, yes?" a familiar voice giggle.

Ask and you shall receive, there stood Ivy and Akane, clad in the diner's cute uniforms. I never knew they worked here, but if they don't, then I'm honored they'd go so far as to steal uniforms for my sake. Best wingwomen ever.

"I guess I'll have one of your finest cake sundaes. I've heard they're quite good," I winked.

"Ey, those got them straws you can suck with a couple. I want one too," Bobby grinned as he made smooching noises.

"I only eat greatness, and that sundae is great. One for me!" Amon declared.

"And are we forgetting I'm royalty? By decree I MUST have the best, both in love, and food," Nadir smiled as he gazed intently at my eyes.

"Sorry, only one per couple. But, if you need some more time, we'll happily set you up with just some water," Akane winked.

I know they're helping, but I just inadvertently made this all harder on myself. Must I choose so quickly? I- I just met them all face-to-face for the first time. They're so handsome and hunky, I- I just can't think straight.

"Order of pancakes. I understand, they shall be ready, posthaste," Ivy smiled as she headed for the kitchen.

Oh thank you, my dear friend. When I make my choice, I will most certainly aid you in your quest for love, dear Ivy. Akane as well. You two are such irreplaceable friends.

Now as we all wait for the pancakes to arrive, a chance for casual talk has arisen, but I know not of what to discus! My heart won't stop thumping, and my face is only getting redder, yet the hunks smiles are only further melting me.

"So you all together? What hobbies you into?" Akane asked.

I thank you my dear friend and wingwoman.

"Oh, we talkin' bout hobbs? I like smokin' n' gettin my nails n' face done all gothy for the gals," Bobby cooed as he made more smooching noises.

"I enjoy history, especially history about the greatest in history, such as Alexander the great, Peter, the great, any great!" Amon proclaimed.

"I do all sorts of things. I exercise, I ride horseback, I even give away puppies to leaders of other countries, with a smile of course. Oh, and building statues of me and my ancestors around the palace. And did I mention Momo is the only woman I'll make babies with?" Nadir chuckled.

That's not fair! I'm about to overheat! Nadir you idiot... I think I'm in love with you.

"AHEM!"

Turning, I notice a disgruntled man standing by our table. Something is off about him, he looks different from us, yet strangely familiar. But I have more important things to focus on.

"Nadir, I love you. Make babies with me."

"And that's how romance ought to be. Congratulations," Ivy smiled as she returned with the cake sundae, placing it between me and my dear Nadir.

Oh, prince Nadir, I love you so. To our everlasting happy marriage-

"ALRIGHT! That's it! This doesn't count as me rewriting shit," the disgruntled man fumed as he pulled out what appeared to be a giant pen.

Whoosh!

Shatter!

Ugh, my fucking head. Last thing I remember I was looking like a shoujo character then- Wait! What the fuck is going on!? Why am I here, and why am I wearing this shitty dress and heels!?

"Huh!? The hell am I wearing this shitty uniform for!?" Ivy fumed as she trembled in fury at the revealing and cutesy uniform she was clad in.

"Glad to have you back Momo. You too Ivy. Now come out, Josie. I have much to complain about for what you did to my world these past two months," Jeter glared. 

Wait, did he say "two months"!? No way I was in shoujo land for two fucking months! We only got a year left, and if two of those months just got wasted, I'm gonna make that fashion bitch pay!