16.5 (3)

Daily Journal

Day 223

I figured out what's missing. It doesn't feel like home because Takuya isn't here. I'm so dumb for not realizing that until now. It was so obvious. You'd think that I'd be able to figure that one out based on how much I write about him in here.

I miss Takuya. But I hope he didn't miss me. I... hope he's living a happy life with his friends and girlfriend. Maybe he doesn't have one. That's fine too. Single life is underrated. I'd also understand if he didn't want a girlfriend after what I did.

After all this time I still can't believe I fucked up that badly. The worst part is that I didn't mean to. But that's not an excuse. I just need to accept that I made mistakes and go forward in life while not forgetting my desire to make up for those mistakes, instead of dwelling on them and letting them shackle me down forever.

He almost died. Do I deserve to be able to do that?