Echoes of a Name That Still Plays

Originally, we had planned a sleepover—basically a pajama party—with Yasu and Ray at one of our places, even before the hot springs trip. However, there was one tiny detail we hadn’t accounted for.

Ray had gotten a girlfriend.

Sayuri wanted to spend all her time with Ray. Of course, in a good way, and we actually supported it. Besides, I was also aware that spending time with my family on New Year’s Eve was important. So, in the end, our little “pajama party” had turned into a bit of a flop.

Still, we decided to meet up on New Year’s Eve in the afternoon since we hadn’t hung out in weeks. I needed to buy gifts for my family. We were going to help Ray pick out a present for Sayuri. As for Yasu—well, since he stayed in the dorms, he had simply come along to hang out and help.

The week before New Year’s was also Christmas, but since Christmas was usually more of a couples’ thing, nothing special happened for me.

As soon as we stepped into the mall, the warmth hit our faces. After the cold outside, the place felt like an oven. A massive Christmas tree stood right in the middle, decorated for the occasion, with children taking photos next to it.

“Dude, this place is packed,” Yasu muttered, stuffing his hands into his pockets.

“Of course it is,” I replied. “It’s New Year’s Eve.”

“Look, let’s just get this over with,” Ray said, his eyes constantly flicking to his phone. It wasn’t hard to guess—he was texting Sayuri.

I rolled my eyes. “You say that, but do you even know what you’re getting her?”

“Well… no.”

Yasu sighed. “So, you dragged us here to help you pick a gift for Sayuri, but you don’t even have an idea?”

“Just help me out, guys! What should I get her?”

“So we’re starting from scratch…” I groaned. This was going to be a nightmare.

For the next thirty minutes, we wandered through every store. Ray couldn’t decide whether to buy perfume or a necklace, and we were running out of patience.

Finally, his eyes lit up when he spotted some wool scarves in a store. He picked out a red one and asked, “Uh… girls like these kinds of things, right?”

I laughed. “Shouldn’t you know better than me?”

Yasu nodded. “Dude, if she doesn’t like it, you can return it. Just go pay already.”

After buying the gifts, we were exhausted.

“Let’s take a coffee break,” I suggested.

“That would be great,” Ray agreed. “I need to check what Sayuri texted me.”

We sat down at a café. While Ray focused on his phone, Yasu took a sip of his drink.

I had gotten a cinnamon and cookie-flavored coffee.

“Guys, seriously, what are we going to do about your single status?” Ray smirked at us. You literally just got a girlfriend three weeks ago…

“It’s not like you made the first move either,” Yasu pointed out. He was sitting right next to Ray and casually took another sip of his coffee.

“What does that have to do with anything? Besides, it doesn’t matter—I have someone, and you guys don’t. You both need to find someone already! That way, I’d at least have someone to get advice from, or we could go on double—or even triple—dates!” Ray whined like a spoiled child. Did Sayuri even know this side of him?

“Heh.” Yasu dismissed him with his usual deadpan tone.

“What the hell is ‘heh’ supposed to mean? Seriously, Yasu, is there really no one?”

“If there was, do you think I’d be here, idiot?” He had a point. The two of us had come here mainly because of Ray.

“Well, I’m here too!” This guy was actually an idiot…

“That’s because you’re a fool.” Yasu had practically read my mind. I tried to hold back my laughter, but I couldn’t hide my smirk.

“What did you say, you bastard?!” Ray snapped, glaring at Yasu. He was obviously annoyed.

“Calm down,” I finally said. We couldn’t disturb the other people around us—after all, they didn’t know these two were just joking around. After I spoke, they both quieted down and sipped their coffee in silence for a while.

“By the way, Yuta, you don’t have anyone either?”

“Nope.” I had seen this coming.

Yasu was quiet for a moment before slightly raising his eyebrows. “Come on, really? No one?”

I was honestly surprised. For some reason, all the attention was suddenly on me.

“No one,” I said. Even though Aiko crossed my mind, nothing had ever happened between us, and it never would. After that, silence fell again.

Normally, I would’ve joked about how it felt like the three of us were on a date, but at this point, it was just the two of us—one of us had already betrayed the single life.

Ray suddenly lifted his head from his phone and looked at me.

“Hey, for real, back in high school, when was the time you were most likely to be in a relationship?”

I frowned. “What do you mean?”

“I mean, was there ever a time when you got along really well with someone? Like, back then, there was Emi, right?”

I slowly stirred my coffee. Emi’s name echoed in my ears.

“So?” Ray winked at me. “Do you still talk to Emi?”

She had transferred into our class in high school after a year of remote learning due to the pandemic. She was the only girl I had ever been interested in. It was strange that she suddenly came up in conversation.

“Emi?”

Her name felt unfamiliar, like a blurry memory. A scene flashed through my mind—her walking up to me in the hallway, wearing her brown winter uniform. Her eyes smiled, but there was always a strange distance in her voice.

Why was someone I hadn’t thought about in years suddenly being brought up?

I swallowed, feeling uneasy. “Why are you asking?”

“I ran into her last week when I was walking Sayuri home on Christmas Eve,” Ray said, taking a sip of his coffee before continuing. “It was late, and I wasn’t planning on sticking around, but we ended up chatting.”

Back in high school, Emi and I used to have lunch together. Ray often joined us, though Emi and I were closer.

“You used to talk to her normally anyway, didn’t you?” Even after things between Emi and me had faded, Ray had told me they still talked.

“Yeah, but since it was a random meeting, and because of the whole holiday atmosphere, we got a little nostalgic. We ended up talking about you, too.”

My heart suddenly sped up. Me? Why? With all the new things happening in university, what did I have to do with anything?

“About me? Why me?” I asked, trying to hide my curiosity and confusion.

“Dude, before that—did you ever have feelings for Emi in high school?”

Yasu was silently watching. I wasn’t used to being the center of such a conversation, and it made me uncomfortable. Did I ever have feelings for Emi? I guess not. I was interested in her, but it never turned into anything more.

“To be honest, no.” But Ray didn’t seem convinced.

“Why?” He sounded almost accusatory.

“What do you mean, why? She wasn’t the type of person I’d connect with.” It was hard to recall what I had thought three years ago. Wasn’t it too late to be reminiscing?

“But you two got along so well.”

“Not like that. We were too different. But we were still good friends. She even called me ‘dude.’”

Why did I feel like I was defending myself in court? Was this something I had to explain?

“So that’s why you drifted apart? Because she called you ‘dude’ and made it clear you were just friends?”

I froze. How dare he step on such a sensitive spot? We had talked about this before, hadn’t we?

“Ray, what’s your point? We had fun as friends, then drifted apart. What’s the big deal now?” My breathing was heavy, and my frustration seeped into my tone.

“I found something out.”

“What?” My heart pounded, heat rushing through me.

Ray sighed lightly.

“Emi liked you back then.”

The world fell silent.

I gripped my coffee tightly.

“What?”

Ray nodded. “Yeah, she liked you. But she thought you only saw her as a friend, so she acted distant.”

I took a breath, but the air wasn’t enough.

Was… was this possible?

Had I misunderstood everything?

I looked up at Ray.

“Why are you telling me this now?”

Ray shrugged, his expression serious.

“Because I thought it was in the past. But… is it?”

I looked away.

I didn’t know.

I really didn’t know.

And that question awakened something inside me.