King of fools

As news broke of the 6B tournament, one of the most divided teams on the matter was none other than Georgia.

"Banani and Tinatin. No further questions," Nino scoffed.

"Why! Banani may be bald and browless, but her eyelashes are still real!" Banani cried.

"So? We pluck em' off n' slap fake ones on. No difference. Gurandukht can even do the honors."

The thought of Gurandukht forcefully plucking out all her eyelashes did arouse Banani a bit, but this time, she had a check on her masochism levels.

"Banani doesn't want to participate. Banani has plans!"

And she wasn't the only one.

"Um, I don't really want to shave my head," Tinatin trembled.

Nino shot her a nasty glare. "And you're speaking up, why? This is the perfect slop to sacrifice you to. Besides, it'll allow you the honor of finally seeing the world with both eyes," she snarled as she forcefully flicked aside Tinatin's bangs that obscured her left eye.

"Oi, you wanna land yourself in deep shit, Nino? The rules say in fine print that should our team agree to participate, we can vote on who to send over," Nestan-Darejan glared.

"How democratic! Then I cast my vote for the Tinatin-Banani ticket, unless of course you or Gurandukht would like to take Banani's place."

"Banani also votes for Tinatin, but not herself," Banani stated.

"I'm voting for Nino, how about you, Gurandukht?" Nestan-Darejan asked.

"My vote is for Nino as well."

"Nino..."

"Oh, Banani changes her vote to Nino. Nino and Tinatin!"

Nino gritted her teeth in fury. "You fucking traitors! I'm not shaving-"

"The democratic process you hailed moments ago just voted for you to shave your head. If need be, we'll drag you to the salon bound and gagged, which will only further humiliate you," Nestan-Darejan glared.

"Sounds like fun. Banani votes we do that to Nino anyway."

"WANT ME TO YANK ALL YOUR EYELASHES OUT NOW!?"

"ENOUGH! Ladies, unless someone wants to volunteer, we sadly have to send someone else to baldville along with Nino. Do we have any volunteers?" Nestan-Darejan asked.

No hands were raised, and with the resulting vote ending in deadlock, it looked like things would need to be decided via other means.

"How about King of the hill? I win, Tinatin joins me. She wins, she's out," Nino scoffed.

Nestan-Darejan scowled, but with chess being brought into things, there was little she could do to stop it. "Very well, but Tinatin goes first."

"Sure, let her."

In King of the hill, the goal was mainly to get the king to one of the four squares in the center of the board. Like other chess variants, outright checkmate was also a viable means of victory.

Once the game was setup, Tinatin opened by moving her pawn to e4, while Nino moved her pawn to c6. Tinatin then moved her king to e2, attempting to go for the win outright, but Nino countered by moving her pawn to d5. That didn't deter Tinatin as she pressed her king onward to d3, but Nino was no fool when it came to this variant, and moved her pawn to c5.

Tinatin attempted to create counterplay by moving her pawn to b4, but Nino flawlessly countered by moving her queen out to d6. Tinatin didn't care, and pressed for victory once more, capturing the pawn at c5 with her b-pawn. Nino naturally captured said pawn with her queen, but it was then that Tinatin's tunnel vision finally got the best of her as she moved her bishop to a3.

"Thanks for finally cracking. Check!" Nino sneered as she moved her queen to c4, forcing Tinatin to move her king to e3.

"I haven't cracked. This is King of the hill, so all I need to do is get the king to the center," Tinatin glared.

"Or lose. Checkmate," Nino snickered as she captured the pawn at e4 with her queen, winning the game.

Tinatin went pale with shock as she realized she had forgotten that checkmates were still possible in King of the hill. Nino was all smiles as while she was upset about having to go bald, Tinatin being forced to go bald with her would all but make up for it.

"And with that, it's decided. Nino, Tinatin, I hope your bald heads bring forth victory for the team," Nestan-Darejan sighed.

"Lousy pep talk, but fine. I'LL make sure to hog that 10 million all to myself," Nino scoffed as she and Tinatin headed out. 

The full game:

White: DSPCM Tinatin Okruashvili (2293) Black: DSPCM Nino Natsvlishvili (2446)

1. e4 c6

2. Ke2 d5

3. Kd3 c5

4. b4 Qd6

5. bxc5 Qxc5

6. Ba3 Qc4+

7. Ke3 Qxe4#