That little beggar

Tatsuya didn't react at first so I thought he hadn't heard me.

Then his attention slapped the side of my face and I turned to him, reading part of the answer in his strained breathing and the way his eyes stayed wide even as his gaze floundered.

“More than –?” He hardly seemed able to get his own question out.

“Or was it like a one sided thing?” I sat down on the second to last step leading to Uchi's house and watched Washi calm the drion down, stroking its scales and speaking close to its face, whilst Kohaku checked the underside of the white and grey wagon. “If so, sorry about that.”

“I'm –” Tatsuya stopped and drew in a fortifying breath before he sat down beside me. “– your friend.”

“Okay, so it wasn't a two way thing?” I nodded.

His embarrassment scorched the left side of my face and chest too. Though I wanted to get a better picture of Shizuka's life, I had no desire to cruel about it.

“I don't know,” he said quietly, hiding behind the hand he propped up on his knee. “I never had the chance to find out before –”

“Oh,” I replied, muting my own tone. “That – must have been frustrating.”

His silence was loud.

“If I remember anything, I'll let you know,” I said.

The offer was bound to be a poor form of compensation but it was all I had. If he was telling the truth – and the pain radiating from his semi curled up figure made me think he was – it meant he had been harbouring an unrequited and unexpressed love for Shizuka for the last ten years. That was a special kind of torture that I could almost understand in a familial form.

That being said, I had no idea whether he had been alone throughout that decade or whether he had been able to get over the woman who died before he could confess. The way he had rushed to meet me at Aoto's, the intense tenderness of his embrace, and the speed in which he had transformed into a dragon to save me all hinted that his feelings were far from gone and that he hadn't found anyone else to occupy his heart.

But I couldn't forget how familiar Toshi had been around him and the yearning in her eyes whenever she looked at him. Ten years was as long a time to spend with someone as it was to spend without them, and the other woman was attractive enough. She had been here to fill in the space Shizuka had left behind and god only knew how well she had managed to do just that. The thought prompted another memory without warning and I was hurled back into Shizuka's past like a leaf in a hurricane.

“Shizu?” The urgency in Tatsuya's voice snatched my focus from Uchi's book of rare herbs and I marked my page with a finger as I stood up.

“Tatsu?” I emerged from the back of the shop and nearly walked straight into him. “What's wrong?”

“I tried to talk to him,” he said, his agitated eyes slowly steadying as they connected repeatedly with mine. “Like you do but –”

“Tried talking to who?” A movement behind him nearly made me pull him towards me but the child standing at his side flinched as my hand neared her head. “Who's this?”

“Her name's Toshiko,” said Tatsu. His words tumbled out so much faster when he was nervous and normally it was amusing. Now it was a relief. “She hasn't done anything but he keeps hurting her.”

I withdrew my hand and crouched down to get a better look at the little girl holding on the back of his clothes with one hand, her jet-black stare fixed on my face even as she trembled uncontrollably.

“Someone hurt you?” I asked her softly.

She hid her face against his waist for a second, then peeked at me before nodding.

“Who?”

The evidence marred her throat and thin arms in patches of red and purple. Long periods of wakefulness had bruised the sensitive skin around her eyes and the corners of her mouth curved downwards as if tiny anchors had been attached to them. Slivers of pale skin peeked through small slits in her light brown tunic and frayed thread dangled from its hem. The lower legs of her trousers had been torn off at knee height, revealing legs that were as thin as her arms and covered in grime. A completely different picture from the well dressed, round faced boy who had brought her here.

Before she could answer me, a loud shout made us all jolt on the spot.

“Where is she?” roared a man just outside the shop. “Where did that little beggar run off to?”

Toshiko whimpered and held onto Tatsuya with both hands, eyes still wide open even as she pushed her forehead against his side. He placed a hand on her back but terror rattled his own expression as he looked at me.

“Who is he?” I asked as a shadow darkened beneath the curtain that hung in the doorway of Uchi's shop.

“Her father, I think,” he said breathlessly.

I stepped around him just as a muscular arm shoved the fabric aside and a man with straw-coloured hair twisted up into a bun atop his head pushed his way into the shop.

“There you are,” he growled, stopping as I barred his way with my right arm. “Get out of the way, brat.”

“You seem angry,” I said, sidestepping when it looked like he would barge past and grab the quivering children who moved in sync to stay hidden behind me. “Can I ask why?”

“Isn't it obvious?” he said, looking at me now instead of them, and his rage might have been powerful enough to force my gaze aside but that would have encouraged his current behaviour. “That little wretch keeps running off, no matter how many times I teach her not to.”

“What's she running from?” I asked, showing him my empty palms and shaking my head. “She seems really scared.”

“She should be,” he said. “I don't have time to waste telling her the same thing over and over again. I'm a busy man and she's costing me a lot of money.”

“Money?” I wished I didn't have an idea about what he could mean but life in Outer Town had shown me things I would never have been ready to see, no matter how old I was. “Has she stolen money from you? If so, she should just give it back –”

“All she has to do is do whatever she's told.” He took several steps closer, looming over us. “It's as simple as that.”

Tatsuya's fingers latched onto the back of my kimono and I realised I should have signalled to him so he could lead the child away. Sweat warmed my skin but my palms heated up in a different way. I lowered them before he could noticed and tracked the movement of his rib cage, the bottom of which was well within my reach. His protruding stomach helped outline it better than I could have hoped, even through the thick fabric of his sleeveless shirt, and his right hand moved more animatedly than his left.

“Do you need money, sir?” I asked, half focused on the middle left quadrant of his abdomen, half distracted by the movement of the curtain beyond the top of his head.

“I need you to stop wasting my time and get out of the way,” he snapped, raising his open palm.

The movement was aggressive, smooth, clearly second nature. Tatsuya started to pull me back. A smaller hand twisted into the other side of my kimono, lower down than his, and Toshiko's gasp sounded like it had been squashed against a wall. I braced myself but, before her father could bring his hand down, someone caught it with their own.

“This might be a bad time but I can't let you hit that healer,” said a tall youth with a cheerful face that barely matched the sturdiness of his frame.

“What?” The older man tried to pull himself free of the other's grip but he gave up quickly, his face growing red and blotchy. “Get your hands off me.”

“I heard she's one of the best medical psychic warriors in the land,” said the newcomer, pulling his arm down and using it to draw Toshiko's father closer to him. “And I'd like her to help my sister.”

“I don't give a damn about your sister –” A lean finger pressed against his mouth, cutting his words off.

“Well, I do,” replied the dark skinned stranger, sliding into the space between him and us. “Very much.”

I couldn't see his face from this angle but the change in his tone was likely a reflection of his expression. He let go of the older man and straightened his deep blue silk jacket.

“Now, did I hear that right? Do you need money, kind sir?” he asked, glancing over his shoulder. I nodded and he winked. “If so, I think I have a solution all of us will like. Would you like to hear it?”

I assumed the stranger in Shizuka's memory was the one they called Yor, Yua's brother, and that he had paid for Toshi's freedom since the child had clearly had the chance to grow up into a relatively healthy young lady.

That didn't mean I wasn't annoyed by the memory's abrupt ending.

How else would I know if I was right? I didn't want to ask Toshi about her traumatic past nor had I met Yor. Tatsu was here with me so I could have asked him. But he had just indirectly confessed to having feelings for Shizuka and I had already let him down as kindly as possible with the limited knowledge of their relationship that I had.

“I'm sorry,” he said after catching a glimpse of my expression. “After everything that's happened since you came here, the last thing you probably want to deal with is someone else's one sided feelings.”

“Dealing with people's feelings is part of being alive,” I replied. “And, if it makes you feel better, I think it's clear I didn't hate you in the past.”

“I didn't think you did,” he said softly, looking down at the ground through his knees.

“Oh, that's good.” I cleared my throat just as Kohaku called out to us.

“I think we're good to go!”

“I'm glad to hear that,” called back Uchi from behind us. “Because I think I'm good to be by myself again for a long time.”

Wow. Savage or what? I knew she had heard at least the last part of our conversation as I stood up to say goodbye and wondered whether I should pretend to care about that. Tatsu kept a straight face but his crimson tipped ears gave him away as he bowed to her.

“You're welcome to come with us,” he said.

“Do you think a witch's garden has the power to look after itself, child?” she huffed.

“You don't have to come for a long time. Just until –” He paused. “I could fly you back here as soon as you need me to.”

“If I stay here, I won't need that at all,” she replied, placing a hand on his shoulder. “Besides you all have yet to decide whether Shizuka's return is going to be shared with the rest of Nippo or not. If I come back with you, everyone will believe Ras is telling the truth and you won't have a choice.”

He didn't look happy about her decision but kept quiet as he straightened up.

“You're right,” he said. “But once this is all sorted, you're welcome to visit us. Send me a message if you want a ride.”

“I'm too old to go spinning in the clouds with a dragon, no matter how sensible he is,” she said, turning to me. “Don't go disappearing on him again, you hear?”

“That's not part of my plans.” I laughed until her hand landed on my shoulder and her gaze seemed to suck out my soul.

“Beware the readability of plans, child,” she said. “Never forget that the most dangerous mind is not just the sharpest but the most unpredictable one.”

“I won't,” I replied, holding her stare even as it made my heart quiver.

The warning was clear enough but I couldn't work out exactly what had prompted it. She could speak to spirits and find lost souls in the limbo of this world. Was she also a mind reader? Or maybe a clairvoyant?

“Good.” She handed Tatsuya the herbal-scented bundle that had been resting by her feet. “I know I don't have to ask you to look after her.”

He nodded and looked down at the supplies wrapped in maroon cloth instead of at her face, both warm and cold emotions radiating from him simultaneously. Talk about mixed feelings.

“Now get out of here.” She started walking back towards her house. “And tell your brother to come for Yua.”

“Has Yua always been unable to walk?” I murmured as we headed towards the wagon.

“Not always,” replied Tatsuya, waving at Washi with his free hand until he caught the other's attention. “There was an accident when she was younger.”

“Is that when Yor came to find me?” I asked.

“You remember?” His expression brightened slightly and I found another reason to regret my deception.

“Only a little bit.” The words were barely out of my mouth before the next flashback hit.

“I'm sorry,” I said, covering up the deep purplish scar that marred her lower back with her duvet. I placed my cramped up hands back in my lap and shook my head at the older girl lying prone on the bed as she turned her face towards me. “It happened too long ago and your body has already healed around the wound.”

The faint glimmer of hope in her pale turquoise eyes faded and I didn't know what to say to make up for her loss. Nor could I look at her brother, who sat further down beside her on the mattress. Would he send Toshiko back to her abusive father? Would he punish me for wasting his time?

“If I'd been there as soon as it happened, I might have been able to fix it but, with the way it is now, even Uchi would –” She placed a hand on my own and silence me without words.

“You tried your best,” she said with a pained smile. “I can tell. This isn't your fault.”

“But we had a deal.” I still couldn't look at Yor as he helped his sister up into a sitting position against the light blue wall and arranging her legs over the edge of the bed, making sure she was all covered up. “I promise to take any punishment you want. All that I ask is that you spare the others.”

“Others?” Yua looked at her brother.

“I bought a child in Outer Town,” he replied, displeasure momentarily hardening his features. “It didn't look like her father would leave any of them alone until he was happy enough with the money I offered for her. Shizuka's friend was with her at the time.”

They both spoke so well, their conversation flowing like the Silver River just beyond the village walls, and their expressions seemed so animated despite the calm air that they both had. Inner Town was considerably more peaceful than Outer Town, untouched by the chaos that encircled it. Wind pushed through the blue silk curtains, brining with it quiet murmurs from the street below, and filling the wide room with a delightful coolness that seemed magnified by its tiles and blue, green, and white colour scheme.

“I fail to see how you didn't uphold your end of the deal, Shizuka,” said Yua. “My brother asked you to heal me if you could. We won't hold you – or any of your friends – responsible for being unable to do something beyond your capabilities.”

But she had been so keen to walk again. Her hunger for independence was as fierce as my thirst for knowledge, and even though she had been so kind about it so far, it must have been devastating to finally close the door to a future she would never be able to experience.

“Is there anything else you would ask of me instead?” I insisted, my heartbeat speeding up as I waited for her answer. “I could prepare a remedy for the pain to get you through flare ups. Or maybe my mentor would be able to –”

This time it was Yor who leaned forward and patted my forearm, tilting his head so that I could see his wide smile.

“You don't owe us anything, Shizuka,” he said. “I heard about your skills and that's why I came to find you just in case there was a chance you could help Yua. Our doctors already told us years ago that she would never walk again but we were just too stubborn to accept it. So don't cry.”

He brushed the back of his forefinger beneath my left eye and I dabbed my face with my sleeve to remove any lingering moisture there, biting my lip hard.

“If I could have you do anything for me, Shizuka,” said his sister. “I would ask that you visit me again.”

“Me?” My stomach tightened. “Why would you want that?”

“I have Yor but he can't be here all the time, no matter how much he might want to be,” she explained, placing a hand against the side of her brother's head as if she were about to shove it and he groaned softly. “I don't want to stop him from living his own life but it can get lonely here in this big room. So, if it's not too much trouble, could you visit me every now and then?”

“Is that really enough?” I asked. They both nodded.

“It would be more than enough,” she replied. “And you're welcome to bring your friends with you.”

“But we're all from Outer Town,” I reminded them. Uncertainty trickled with acid over my insides. “Is that okay?”

“Why wouldn't it be?” Her eyes twinkled with a new light, one that no disappointment could ever smother, and I understood just how strong a person she was right then. “I'll send Yor to guide you back here but feel free to find your own way if you'd like.”

“I will.” I stood up and bowed deeply at the waist, hands tucked into opposite sleeves. “Thank you, Yua.”

“Thank you too, Shizuka.” She nodded at me and then at the door. “Yor will escort you through the gates.”

“I know how to get back home from here,” I said quickly. “Please don't bother yourselves.”

“But the guards –” he began but I fled before he could follow me.

The white building and ocean-coloured buildings gave way to light brown and red houses, and I reached the smaller wall that divided Inner Town from its surrounding counterpart faster than I thought I would. I waited until I could find a spot completely out of sight and made sure there was no one around to see me first. Then I transformed into a white phoenix and flew over the wall, heading straight for the Spiritless Tree.

Leaving a trail of earthbound tears behind me.