Stay With Us [ Log 1 ]

Elsa

I don’t know how long I stayed in that empty corridor, listening to Kay’s fading footsteps. I stayed long after my cigarette had turned into ash, until the ever-present cold broke through my scattered thoughts and forced me to return to our room.

Another spaceship roared in the distance as I put my hand on the doorknob and quietly opened the door. I hoped Li was still asleep and hadn't noticed my absence. Even if she was more independent than any kid her age, I hated leaving her alone for that exact reason. She deserved better than that, and I could barely provide the bare minimum to give her the sense of safety that she really needed.

Was that the reason I had so easily agreed to Kay’s offer? Or was I willing to gamble with Li’s life for a more selfish reason? I didn’t have a chance to dwell on those thoughts because the moment I stepped into our shabby room, I saw Sol sitting on the bed with Li. I almost froze. It was a scene too similar to what we’d once had and lost, and I’d sworn never to let it happen again.

“It took you so long...”

Li’s voice filled me with guilt, but she quickly tried to disperse it with her smile the moment she realised what effect her words had on me.

“Sol told me about all the places we should visit on our journey”

I sat down on the edge of the bed, hesitating for a moment before I put my cold hand on hers. A part of me wanted to maintain the distance between me and Sol, even though I was grateful that she had kept Li company while I was away.

“My task is done”

I was relieved seeing Sol get up, but Li looked at her with disappointment, and I heard her whisper, ‘Stay with us’, as if she had forgotten what had happened the last time she had said it to someone. Instinctively, I shuffled over to her and wrapped the blanket around us, forgetting how cold I must be. But she didn’t seem to care, and she huddled up against me, watching Sol walk back to her chair next to the window.

“Thank you”, I said, against my better judgment.

I didn’t want my personal doubts to affect my newly found crew. She had done nothing to deserve it, but the apprehension of what my simple words might lead to lingered in my mind as I lied down next to Li.