The Smallest Guest Room - Part II

Several moons waxed and waned. The sun rose and set, the wind blew, and rains fell in their natural order. Kaoru told himself more than once that he had nothing left to find at that place. And yet, here he was again.

The same owner greeted him without recognition. That was to be expected; he had recently crafted a new disguise for himself. Though he still enjoyed parading about like a young man, he had decided to go with the times and chose a shaved head. His topknot gleamed and smelled pleasantly of jasmine oil. Nothing looked off about this young man entering a brothel to take his pleasures.

He only had a strange request. After a few drinks, he began to ask the women in his company whether they’d ever been to the house’s smallest guest room. The women tilted their heads, whispered and giggled behind their fans, but none seemed to know what he was speaking of. All of them were new faces, he noticed.

The women whispered even more when the young man, as handsome and hot blooded as he seemed, announced he was going for a walk first.

With less drinks in him than usual, navigating the halls came easier. Laughter and sounds of rapture spilled from the rooms he passed. It usually delighted him - but then he froze in his tracks.

Ahead of him, a large man lumbered through the paper halls, almost too wide to fit. Kaoru watched as he crab-shuffled towards a door. He was with company, but Kaoru could not see them behind the mass of the man.

A door opened to their left. The man turned, and suddenly Kaoru caught a glimpse of a small figure almost completely in the man’s shadow. With a hand large enough to scoop them up, the man pushed a young child into the room before him.

The door closed. Kaoru still stood in the hallway. Then he quickly hurried past, before he might hear any sounds.

Sweat stood in his palms by the time he found the guest room. Here again, he hesitated. But finally, he scraped his throat and with a bowed head, he announced his presence.

‘’Pardon me for intruding.’’

The room seemed even smaller when he entered. It had in fact gotten so; a stack of wooden boxes, and a tansu with broken shelves stood against the wall. Both were covered in a layer of dust.

‘’Oh,’’ Kaoru exclaimed softly. He stepped inside and precariously shut the door. He listened for the rushing of silks or light footsteps, but heard only the brothel’s din in the background. Had he come too late?

‘’Hello?’’ he said gently. He gazed at the alcove, the faded scroll, down to the polished wood.

A small trail of footsteps lingered in the dust. Kaoru let out a sigh.

‘’There you are,’’ he said, relieved. He kneeled while there was barely enough space, bowing his head deep to the tatami mat. When he looked up, the small figure was bowing back at him from the small corner between the boxes and the tansu. They appeared solid, but their form was even thinner than before - or perhaps it only seemed that way, as now the figure only wore their red inner wear. Kaoru frowned at that.

‘’Why are you back here?’’ the watery voice spoke, clearly suspicious. That seemed to be the end of formalities. Kaoru did not answer that, for he honestly was not sure himself.

‘’More importantly, why are you still here? Even while you don’t want to be?’’ he countered, just as bluntly.

The apparition said nothing. Kaoru did not feel their reluctance, nor anger like last time. He felt absolutely nothing, which was worse. For a long moment, the two sat in silence.

‘’How long have you been here?’’ Kaoru finally asked, more gently.

The being slowly lifted their head, the long dark brown hair falling around their pale face in unkempt tresses. Finally, Kaoru could see what they looked like.

Despite the traces of neglect, he saw beauty. A high forehead preceded those captivating dark eyes, then a straight nose and sharp cheekbones stretched their tired but flawless skin. Their lips were thin and slanted, the jaw finely squared. A beautiful balance throughout.

But where Kaoru had expected to see a child or young teen, he saw a young adult, like the one whose disguise he was wearing. That startled him the most.

‘’It must have been… a while,’’ he understated. The dark eyes still scanned him with some distrust, but then they drifted to the hanging scroll in the alcove. Kaoru’s eyes followed.

‘’The family that lived here before… They were good people. This was a good house.’’ 

The words came slowly at first, but the being kept speaking.

‘’I barely remember when I first moved in, but I know they always treated me kindly. I played with their children, watched them grow into adults, then played with their children. This was a good house,’’ they repeated, longing in their voice. ‘’But then… they left.’’

Kaoru dared not ask what exactly had happened, but he could guess. ‘’And you stayed… but why?’’

The being shrugged their shoulders. ‘’I did not know where else to go. Besides, soon new people came. And not all of them were bad.’’

Kaoru hummed. He found himself enjoying the sounds of the fluid voice, though their story was a sad one. ‘’But they don’t treat you well, do they?’’

‘’Most don’t even know I am here. I do not reveal myself to many.’’

Now Kaoru’s interest was piqued. ‘’Oh? So who do you reveal yourself to?’’

‘’Sometimes I speak with the women. Rarely with the men.’’

His ego stroked, Kaoru grinned.

‘’A few times, guests left with compliments of our conversation, but my description never matches anyone employed here. It has been driving the owner mad.’’ For the first time, a hint of a smile shone through in the watery voice. Kaoru guffawed, his bellylaugh filling the room. The being sat quietly, waiting for the man to calm.

‘’Mostly, I speak with the children. I tell them to be brave, but also that it is okay to cry. I try to make them smile again. It helps, sometimes.’’

Kaoru had the grace to be quiet now. He pursed his lips, looking at the floor uncomfortably.

The image of a large hand on a small back sickened him.

‘’This should be no place for children,’’ he mumbled.

‘’And yet, it is.’’ There was a deep well of scorn and sadness behind those two words. Too deep for Kaoru to understand.

‘’Why did you speak to me, though?’’ he finally asked, after a long silence.

‘’I don’t know… I suppose it had been a while since I had spoken to anyone. And it is very rare that they can hear me.’’

‘’... I also hate being lonely.’’ Kaoru mumbled, granting the other a little smile. The being seemed to blush, and looked away.

‘’When did you guess what I am?’’ they asked after a while, as if to change the subject.

‘’That was easy,’’ he lied. ‘’When you never gave me your name when I asked, I understood. It is because you don’t have one, do you?’

They nodded, looking down. “Over the years, the children who could see me sometimes called me Toko, so they could talk about me in front of the adults… I did not mind the name, but-’’

‘’You deserve a name more grand than that,’’ Kaoru chuckled, but he meant it. He couldn’t bear the wasteful thought of this person being forever confined to this small forgotten space. Suddenly, it was so obvious what he had to do.

“Why don’t you leave here with me?’’