My bloody messed up life!

Oh god for heavens sake!
my life is so fucking messed up!..i cant bloody handle it!..Iomhara told me that she told tears to ignore me until our exams finish..like what!?..i mean i understand he wants to win my heart and shit but you just cant totally rely on my best friend!...i mean dude why!..can't you make your own bloody decisions!?..and i want someone who can make his own bloody decisions and does not need to pretend when i am around him..ugh!
anyways..you knowijustmade an instagram account and panasonic sent me a follow request he then also liked my post..(yay!!) and i purposely by mistake sent him a message related to Eminem and then he replied by saying that he likedNowhere Fast and i was like -'omg you listen to him!?' and then we kind of cracked jokes,laughed(all this was through text)..it was a nice conversation..i told him that my birthday is on 1st..he asked about special plans..and then well we started talking about cakes..
he asked me what kinda cake i like..unfortunately i had to go and saw the message after a few hours..i then replied with chocolate or pineapple but then i thought if kind was different from flavor..so i asked him(i know it really is stupid..)..he replied that he just wanted to ask about the flavor not the kind..with that i replied by saying 'are there even different kinds of cake?(with a laughing emoji)'..he said'not for me(with a laughing emoji)'..and then after few hours..i sent back a laughing emoji..he has seen the message but not replied yet..its been a day..why isnt he saying anything..its awkward...maybe it is because it was kinda awkward that day we talked..
FLASHBACK(i love writing these!)
"omg im! i am so relieved that the exams have finally finished!!" i practically screamed
"so am i lara!" replied iomhara
"do you think the buses will still ply since we did not go on the given time..i think my bus's driver must have gone to pick up other school's children..i am a bit scared..i dont want to be on the streets all alone..maybe i'll ask aura!..i can go in her bus..and panasonic is there too!"i said..
our exams have just finished..i am so relieved!..(this is the day after my convo with panasonic..but this is not the day i sent the lauging emoji..)
we were walking along the corridor when we saw panasonic...and he saw us..he,i dunno did a weird kinda wave..i dont even know if he was waving at me..it was just awkward and weird..
we were now on the ground floor and i saw aura..i asked her about the bus but she said she wasn't sure about it and was going to take a cab..my mom does not allow me to take a cab for safety reasons so i kindly said no..i then spotted panasonic along with some of his friends and asked him about the bus..being like
"uh..the bus" i  stuttered 
"yes i am going there" he replied
i informed iomhara and she gave me the 'go girl smile!'
and then very shyly i walked down the stairs..he then told me that he was confused whether the bus will be there or not..then went with his friends to board a cab..and then i was left all alone..i was very diappointed and the encounter was very weird..
FLASHBACK ENDS
see?..now this is hella awkward he hasn't texted since..even though he saw the message..i mean he can start any topic i wouldn't give a freakin' damn unless and until i talk to him..he asked me the kind of cake i like just to get the convo going..why cant he do it again..
FUCK!

LaraAngel