HI TO AI/FIRE AND LOVE

Returning to this precise moment is one of my few joys in life.
This moment and the birth of Sakura,no other moments I care to relive as often but these two are worthy of the utmost joy.

This though.

This moment the first time,changed my whole course.

Maybe it would have been better had he just died in the fire that day,I could not ever let that happen though even if it would have made him happier.
I watch the night before I properly met him the first time,I watch as a young man pulls out a raging older man from a fiery home.

Oda Nobunaga,he no longer looks the same as before.

There was a time that he was handsome and even in his darkness he was vibrant in my eyes,now only scars and blackness remains as his visage.
Dark and vicious but not lacking in cunning eyes,still watching for foes even now as his body is burning and the young man tries his best to put out the flames with his bare hands.

Honno-ji was a mess of panic,But Nagareboshi was calm as the wind like his father that he is carrying out on horseback.

It always amazed me even now, how Mori Ranmaru never even saw his lord being carried off on horseback by a young man he had not known except by one meeting to inform Nagreboshi of his actual lineage.
Perhaps it was only to ensure that his master would live by any means,that I full well understand and admire,though he did not last long on this day.

Even covered in farm filth and soot,not a weapon or armor to grace his strong built shoulders I can not bear the sight of looking from my love for as long as I can,I wait on and on for long minutes until I cannot see Nagareboshi any longer.
The samurai vanguard screaming and hunting wondering what is really going on here,crying out in failure.

I laugh.

Once more after this time and I will have no more of this sight,Oda Nobunaga will have no power except if my love allows it.
The scent of the fire is too intoxicating for me so I take myself away,trying to restrain myself from dancing my heart away as morning time nears and I can meet him again for the first time.


THE NEXT DAY.

It never ceases to be the purest form of joy,ecstasy.Seeing him for the first time as he looks at me.
Nagareboshi stands before my eyes,healthy and strong as a bull while he puts a hand to my lips to silence me as he has every time I arrive to his families farm.

He does not know yet that I have done worse than lie for him,that this moment is one of my most innocent.

"You have to go,I don't want anyone to be by here now.Please for your own good,here is all the food I have on me and my coin.Go."

That man,we are standing in a field at dawn by the largest of his families farms and he does not know that I am not a spy,nor does he know that at the first I was just entering Honno- ji to find a new place to thieve my life away for awhile.
Until I laid eyes on him,that day...

I became devoted to him on sight and when I actually said those words to him,as I repeat now before him again for the two hundredth time it never fails to leave him so struck.

"What do you mean?"
"I will not go,I cannot go now.My life is here."

From that moment on,he could not at all whether by strength of will or arm and body,he could not drive me away because I came day after day being his eyes and ears.
A nurse maid and a listening ear to comfort him to which he never even the once had in all his days,I watched as he would tend to Nobunaga day after day until a month passed and his wounds healed just enough to begin a new work.

The beginning of my loves end,where I became mad enough to wreck history for and turn it into my corrected life.

He kissed me just one day before his world ended.
That is a story I hate to recall but for my task I must,for now though I recall the feeling of seeing him happily cutting away at bamboo later on preparing to get rice and I was always there barely able to stand the wind for lacking in weight that Nagareboshi would scold me for.

That large built man would give me most of his meal to fill me up and it made my heart glad and broke it so much knowing as I do now that a true heart like his became black as his fathers just a day from now.

Now though.
I relieve the first joy of my life as I feel the hasty kiss of a man who had not fully realized his own heart towards a young girl of seventeen,he being only nineteen himself.
He had no idea what he was or would lose in hours time.

"Only once more my love,I will fix all of this for good next time around."