Seeing Red

Junko stood there with the same confidence she always wore like a jacket. Leaning on her hips, arms crossed, and a smile I used to think was so beautiful. Now, it was just a memory I was bound to forget.

"How rude," she scoffed. "I went through all this trouble to look for you, and that's the first thing you say to me? That hurts, you know."

"Whose fault is that for even trying?"

"Well, that's true. Still, I wanted a chance to talk to you."

"...About what?"

Her smile grew wider as she approached. Each step was intentional, from the way her hair swayed to the way her legs moved. Clearly, she was trying to suck me back in, but unfortunately for her, I've long since erased her from my thoughts.

Junko inched closer until she was directly in front of me. I was taller than her, so she had to look up at me. Then, she placed two fingers in the collar of my shirt and lightly dragged me down.

"Kinoshita Kazuha. I'll take you back."

At first, I thought I couldn't be surprised. No matter what she threw at me, I could handle it. But this... I wasn't expecting this at all.

And this gesture — pulling me down by the collar — was always how she persuaded me to get what she wanted. Whether it was gifts, boba, tickets to concerts, whatever.

Looking at it now... I'm wondering how I even became so entranced these last two years.

"What did you just say?" I muttered.

"Heh. Didn't hear me the first time? I said, I'll take you back. As in, I'll let you be my boyfriend again."

"...Seriously?"

"I know. It's a great offer, isn't it? Even after the... falling out... that we had, I'm still willing to do this much. So come on. Let's go celebrate with a date."

She took a step back, still keeping her fingers tucked inside my collar, but I didn't budge. She tried again, only to meet the same outcome.

"Let go of me, Junko."

"Hmm? What's this now? I thought you'd be on your knees, crying out of joy. So why does it seem more like you're disappointed? Surely, I'm wrong."

"I can assure you that you aren't wrong. Not even close. Do you really think that after what you did, I'd be so willing to get back together with you? You're out of your fucking mind, Junko."

"Oh, come on, Kazuha. It was just a one-time thing. I got too drunk, partied too hard, and did something I probably shouldn't have done. So what?"

I couldn't help but chuckle.

"You... You're being serious, aren't you?" I asked.

"Was that not obvious?"

"Maybe it was. I was giving you the benefit of the doubt because what sane person would think the way you do? Now I know just what kind of person you really are. Deluded and psychotic. So, let me explain myself in a way you'll understand..."

I snatched Junko's wrist away — not hard, but firm enough to make sure I get the message across.

"Don't treat me as if I'm some kind of product you can just buy back on a whim."

Then, I threw her wrist aside and walked away. But, of course, it's Junko. She would never let me have the last laugh.

"It's because of that first-year slut, Chihara Ouka, isn't it?"

I froze mid-step, glancing around to see that the confident façade had shattered completely.

"...What?" I muttered.

"You're not deaf, Kazuha. I know that much, so don't make me repeat myself. I know you're talking to her. I know you meet up at midnight. I know... that you like her. Is that why you're tossing me aside so easily? Found another girl, and suddenly, I'm the leftover trash."

"What the hell are you—"

"Yeah, I cheated on you. With her ex-boyfriend, no less. And you know what? I'm proud of it. In fact, I'm glad, because now I know just how much I hurt you. It was enough to get you to go after that little bitch. That's why you chose her, right? To try and make me feel like shit? Well, here's the news flash. It won't work because she's also someone else's leftover trash, so go ahead. Take her for yourself, and you'll see that I was the better option in the end."

I didn't even bother asking if she was serious because I knew she was. So, instead, I just sighed.

"Are you done?"

Maybe it's my demeanor, lack of empathy, or the fact that I'm just sick and tired of all this, but Junko... she looks the most defeated I've ever seen her. And even though she has hurt me so much, I can't even be grateful that I came out on top this time.

For the rest of the day, I stayed on my bed, staring blankly at the ceiling. My eyes were closed, but sleep never came. The cold seeped into my bones, but I didn't bother to move or reach for another sheet.

I just... couldn't bring myself to care.

Then came a thought. Chihara Ouka. She'll be going out to the courtyard tonight.

Should I meet her? No, I shouldn't — not when I'm a complete mess right now. At the very least, I should probably let her know.

I grabbed my phone off the nightstand.

[Kinoshita]: "Hey, Chihara. I'm not feeling too well, so I won't be going out tonight. I'm sorry."

Just as I was about to drop the phone, it dinged.

[Chihara]: "Oh no! Are you okay? Did you come down with an illness? Should I come over? Maybe I can bring some food! Food always helps me when I'm sick."

I let out a small chuckle.

[Kinoshita]: "I'm fine. There's no need to come over. I just need to rest for a while, then I'll be back to my usual self."

[Chihara]: "If you say so, Kinoshita. But if you need anything, let me know. Okay?"

[Kinoshita]: "Yeah. Thanks, Chihara."

It feels weird being on the receiving end of someone else's worry, especially someone like Chihara.

I won't reach out.

I can't.

Her efforts... shouldn't be wasted on me.

Maybe if we were together, I would've welcomed her concern without hesitation. But instead, all I could do was laugh bitterly at myself.

What an absolutely twisted thought.

But still...

With that, I flipped my phone off and tossed it aside. I finally lifted myself off the bed. Without even bothering to put on my signature jacket, I stepped outside the dorm and out onto the quiet courtyard.

She'll be there, right? Just like she always is. Maybe I won't go up to her. At the very least, I wanna see her.

Then, the moment I reached the intersection... Everything inside of me just stopped.

Chihara was there, but someone else was with her. A guy — the same one who approached me the other day.

Jizou Kenji, her ex-boyfriend.