Chapter 19:

Mistakes - Part 3

Skipped a Beat


(Months later)

25th December, Sachi told me some days ago that her dad told her that they are leaving early. And I told her to tell it to everyone… She didn’t care for everyone, she got so close to me that she shared this with me. last time she didn’t. but this time it’s different.

Today we decided that we will hangout the last time… kind of goodbye today. I’m on my way to school, we decided to meet there. Then if we want to go somewhere, we will.

Honestly, I don’t want to meet her knowing that it is the last time I will… but for her I have to…

Oh, they are all here before me…

“What took you so long” (Hina)

“I’m on time, you guys are just early”

“Yeah…”

“Where do you want to go Sachi?” (Takahashi)

“Inside…”

“The school?”

“Yeah… I want to spend the last time with you guys in the classroom… where we met”

“I see… then let’s go” (Takahashi)

(Some hours later, at home)

What did I even expect? Everyone just sat there, quiet, and awkward… then we went out. Walked around the school for some time then went outside and sat in the park…

We’ll just see her off at the station on 28th… last time I’ll ever talk to her…

(28th December)

It's 08: 23 right now, we are all standing on a train station. Sachi will leave in about 7 minutes. Her dad took the plane, she'll go by train… last meeting and I can't do anything but stare at her face…

"Why isn't anyone saying anything? She is about to go away you know..." (Hina)

"What can we even say, take care?" (Takahashi)

"It's okay, I understand why everyone is so quiet." (Sachi)

"All we could say is how we enjoyed our time with you" (Aoi)

"Glad we were able to meet you" (Hina)

"Sorry I couldn't think of any way to save you." (Eiji)

"Don't worry about that, if a person's time has come, they will die. Death is inevitable. I wasn't even expecting you guys to come up with something." (Sachi)

Takahashi: she’s a lot relaxed than the first time I was at the end of second year.

"Yeah…" (Takahashi)

"Yeah, so don't get too sad over that I’m going away. Just be happy that you were able to spend time with me"

"I'll try" (Takahashi)

"Good" (Sachi)

"..."

"Are you sure you packed everything?" (Eiji)

"Haha, my suitcase could be empty right now, it doesn't even matter."

"Yeah..."

"08: 29..." (Takahashi)

"Train is here..." (Aoi)

"I'll be going then" (Sachi)

"Goodbye..." (Aoi, Hina and Eiji)

"Takahashi..." (Sachi)

"..."

"(Sachi hugs Takahashi) take care then… I'll go now..."

"……. I will" (Takahashi)

Takahashi: I didn't want to let go… but that would have been childish, and I decided that I'll try my best to get over her… I hope I can do it this time. Because I probably won't restart, so I won't get another chance.

(Later that day at night)

She got onto the train and left… and after some hours, we saw the news of the trains colliding. Seeing her die the second time hurt less actually, because I was expecting it to happen… and I know I couldn't have done anything. But that's that then. Now I have to complete my second year, focus on my studies more. I haven't been through third year yet, so I will have to study for it, unlike first and second.

(Months later)

Just like every time, I'll go to sleep and hoping to wake up for the next year, but instead end up somewhere else. But this time I think I should wake up normally.
I have been feeling a lot better about Sachi now. Though I know that I'll be separated from my friends, I'm fine with that.
It's 22: 56 right now, and I'm going to sleep.

(Goes to sleep)

*Phone buzzing

Takahashi: … My alarm!

What year is it? It has now become a habit, every time I wake up for the new year, I check what year it is

This scene… shit…

I know it’s 2018, I remember it well. So, I’m back… again… WHY? I didn’t kill myself this time, what the hell happened? I was fine the last time; I don’t think I hit my head that I could have died of internal bleeding or something…

Another chance? No, this is torture… making me go through Sachi’s death multiple times… WHO THE FUCK IS DOING THIS (Punches the wall on his left side). Fuck that hurt… I’m done… I’m tired of trying to save Sachi. I’m just going to stay here in Tokyo and complete my high school… but I still don’t know why I restarted. Is it because I couldn’t save Sachi? If it is because of that… then… what can I even do? I know she can’t be saved…

I can’t be sure if it’s because of that or something else. For now, I’ll just stay in Tokyo, I’m not going to Kyoto to meet her and tell her about her death.

I didn’t check what year it is from my phone, though I have a 2018 calendar on my table.
Yeah, it is 2018. It’s 07: 44 right now. I should just go to school.

08: 08, I’ll walk to school today. Since I’m not in a hurry.

08: 24, I don’t even need to check my name in the list, I know it’s 1 – A. I’m sitting in my classroom. Only Eiji is here. Aoi comes around 08: 30.

Yeah, 08: 30 and Aoi just entered the classroom. I’m not going to talk to them this time. Let’s just see what happens. If I become friends with them or not. Though, being with them reminds me of Sachi… Hina enters the classroom after around 3 4 minutes of Aoi. This is my third time I am going through my first year.

(A year later)

So, tomorrow is 1st April 2019, Monday. Right now, Aoi, Hina and Eiji are my friends. Became friends around the exams of first term exams, just like last time. Because I’m a smart student.

And since I know what questions will appear in the exams, I wasn’t studying much. And they found it really weird that I didn’t study and still got the highest marks in exams. Well, I won’t tell anyone what I have been through, I’m just going to spend my time like a normal high school student. And see if I restart at the end of second year or not.

Also, Aoi didn’t confess this time… Maybe because I went to Kyoto with her, something happens there that she starts liking me? I don’t know. And I don’t care much. I never had feelings for her, she’s just a friend for me.

23: 22, I’m lying on my bed, thinking if I should try to stay awake to see what happens. But I think I restart at the end of second year, never first. So, I should just go to sleep. Will try this next year.

Oh, that’s why my phone was dead at that time, it’s on 2% right now. I should charge it a little before going to sleep. So that mom doesn’t have to come up and wake me up.

00: 07, I left my phone to charge and accidently went to sleep… and it’s still 2019, I didn’t restart. So, I guess it’s fine. I will wake up for second year tomorrow. My phones 77% right now. I should just go to sleep else I’ll be sleepy the whole day tomorrow.

(Goes to sleep)

*Phone buzzing

Takahashi: my alarm… what time is it? Oh yeah, I don’t need to check. I know that I didn’t restart. And I have a 2019 calendar on my table. So, it is 2019.

It’s 07: 33, and this year, Sachi comes… what will she be like? Without knowing that she’ll die at the end of this year, what will be she like? I’m kind of happy that I didn’t tell her that. Now she’ll be living a normal life without the stress of knowing one’s own death.

Wait, she won’t come today, but tomorrow. I never asked why she doesn’t come on the first day.

(Next day)

08: 20, I’m in my class right now, Eiji is here. Hina is late as usual, and Sachi and Aoi aren’t here yet.

“Good morning Eiji”

“Good morning”

“Hina is late as usual”

“Yeah”

Takahashi: Sachi is here…

“… Takahashi?” (Sachi)

“Sachi…” (Takahashi)

“Wait, you know me?”

“Same middle school…”

“Yeah…”

“Yeah…”

Takahashi: this is awkward…

“Oh, you guys know each other?” (Eiji)

“Yeah, he was popular in middle school, so everyone knew about him.” (Sachi)

“Because of his grades?”

“Yeah…”

Sachi: Can’t say his looks… don’t want to show I was ever interested… though this is a really big coincidence, and a great chance…

“You both friends?” (Eiji)

“NO… we have never talked before” (Takahashi)

Takahashi: it is a lie though… not a lie but a secret

“I see…”

“Good morning Eiji, Takahashi” (Aoi)

“Good morning Aoi”

“Hina isn’t here yet?”

“Yeah, it’s 08: 27 right now, no way she’ll even come before 30”

“Haha, yeah” (Aoi)

Sachi sat a seat behind me, just like last time. But she didn’t talk much. I don’t know if I’ll become friends with her or not… maybe I should talk if she can’t… she did say last time that she had liked me since middle school. So, there’s a chance that she won’t mind if I try to be friends with her. I should ask her to eat lunch together. Maybe we can become close from there.

Wait… why am I even trying to be friends with her? I’m just going to repeat the same mistake again. I should try to stay away this time. So that it won’t hurt when she goes away

(Days later)

Or so I thought… but I didn’t think of this. Sachi became friends with Aoi and Hina… so she’s always hanging out with us… I thought I might be able to stay away but now I can’t… whatever. I’ll just try to be friends with her. the park and everything won’t happen so… I’m sure I won’t catch feelings for her this time… though I still like her…

(27th December)

Nothing changed… everything went exactly the same… she confessed, and I couldn't reject her…

Today is the last day I'll see her. But no one knows that it's her last day except me...
It's 08: 25 right now, we are all at the airport.

"How long will it take to reach Kyoto?" (Aoi)

"I don't know, probably around 1 to 2 hours" (Sachi)

"Message us when you Get there" (Hina)

"I will" (Sachi)

"Takahashi, you alright?" (Sachi)

Takahashi: Should I tell her or not… What am I even thinking? This is way better than Last time we were waiting at the station. They'll find out from the news. Like a normal person does… I shouldn't say anything

"Yeah… I'm fine"

"Are you really?"

"I… I'll miss you"

Takahashi: forever…

"Really? Are you sad just because of that?"

“Yeah...”

“We can talk on phone, and it’s probably just for 3 or 4 months, I’ll ask my dad to let me stay in Tokyo for third year”

“I know but...”

“But?”

“Nothing, I can wait. it will be fine”

“Yeah, it will be. and don’t get too attached to me silly, what if something happens to me? you’ll break, and I don’t want that to happen”

Takahashi: something IS going to happen… how can I tell her… how? just let go… not everyone you meet is meant to stay with you forever…

“Don’t worry, I’ll be fine”

“Good. I’ll be going, or I’m going to be late for the flight”

“I know...”

“Take care guys, will meet you in about 4 months” (Sachi)

“You too, Take care” (Aoi)

“Call me when you get there” (Hina)

“I will” (Sachi)

“...Bye” (Takahashi)

“(Sachi hugs Takahashi) just call me when you miss me ok?”

“Ok… I will” (Takahashi)

Takahashi: Tell me how to call a dead person…

(Later that day, at night)

Nothing… Exactly the same as first time, the news and everything, just their reaction was sadder than before… I don’t even want to think about it…

(Months later)

I couldn’t understand the reason behind why I restarted so I’m sure this time too, I’ll go back to first year. Tomorrow is 1st April, Wednesday… for Eiji, Hina and Aoi. For me it’s probably, 2nd April 2018, Monday.

It’s 21: 58, I’m going to sleep… or not. what if I try staying awake, what happens then? I don’t know but I should check, what if I can escape this loop.

(10 hours later)

I have been using my phone since, on full brightness and listening to rock music on full volume so that I don’t go to sleep, and I am sure I haven’t dozed or anything because it’s still 1st April 2020.

It’s 07: 50 right now. I’m going to get ready and go to school.

08: 05, I’m on my way to school on foot, I have been consistently checking the year on my phone. It’s still 2020. Since I don’t know why and how that restart occurs. I’m checking incase I’m going, and the year suddenly changes. Of course, if that happens, my surroundings will change too. But it’s making me anxious… what if I sleep now? Will I go back? Does it only happen if I go to sleep? Just night before first day of new year or could be any night after the new year starts? I can’t be sure, but I will find out today for sure.

08: 25, I just remembered that I was in different class than my friend’s last time. Let’s see what happens now. I can see Eiji and Hina standing there.

“What happened? Which class am I in?”

“Takahashi, you are in…

Takahashi: 3 – C

3 – C” (Eiji)

“Oh… You guys?” (Takahashi)

“Me and Hina are in 3 - E”

Takahashi: good for Hina, since she liked Eiji…

“And Aoi”

“Aoi is also in 3 - C”

Takahashi: oh, she’s the same class as me. That’s nice, I’m not completely alone… Ahh, my head is starting to hurt a little

“Oh, that’s nice”

“Yeah, we’ll see each other in recess then”

“Yeah”

Aoi isn’t here, maybe she’s already in class

Yeah, she’s sitting there

“Good morning Aoi” (Takahashi)

“Oh, Takahashi, you came. Good morning”

“We are in the same… class as last time”

“Yeah… Takahashi, are you ok?”

“Yeah, I’m fine”

“You don’t look good”

“I just didn’t sleep much last night; I’ll be fine after I sleep”

Takahashi: I don’t know if I’ll even be here… I hope I do, I’m tired of repeating these years.

“Why didn’t you sleep? What were you doing last night”?

“Nothing, just watching anime”

“Seriously? Act a little your age at least…”

“Haha, don’t worry… I’ll be fine”

“Okay… don’t do this ever again though”

"I know, I wo..."