Now thisーthis is a part where I introduce you to Poro. Ah, speaking of which, I haven't introduced myself, haven't I? Oops, it's quite ironic isn't itーboasting about how all of this is about me, and yet I forgot to introduce my very self, my bad sorry.
My name is Rubiーoften mispronounced as Ruby but honestly, I don't really mind at all. Being cocky about small mistakes doesn't seem to be worth the trouble I think. Appearance-wise I don't have anything that stands out, but you could recognize me easily from my glasses, a rimless one, and I always do my hair in a ponytail.
And... that's pretty much it in my opinion, I mean aside from my personality thatーOne, I cannot say what makes me different from another girl; Two, isn't it impossible to tell your personality objectively unless it is seen by another party but yourself? Thus, in that caseーI'll leave that to you, judge me as you will as the story goes.
If there's one thing I can tell you.
One thing that might raise your interest.
That I was an undercover detective.
Not an aspiring one.
But a legally employed one.
Even though I'm still in the 2nd grade of high school.
Of course, not anymoreーsince I said it to you out loud. So don't have to worry about the government abducting you for knowing this secret, at this point the one who should worry about that is me. The government really loves their secret being nothing but a secret. I'm pretty aware that many citizens of this lovely country already acknowledge our existence, they just have no idea which one is spying on them, nor have they heard this fact from the government themself.
It was just a rumor among us.
Therefore by me, a former government civil service employee, confirming the truth about the rumor is basically not different from digging my own grave. I really don't care anymore, I'll accept whichever fate that I'll meet. I won't be angry about it, because it wasn't my fault in the first place. I'm not the one who decides which fate I want to path, the government is.
Even entering this school was anything but my sole decision. It was just another case that I need to solve. Even when that case was solved I can't enroll in another school. It would be suspicious, they said. Ah, have I ever said that being an undercover detective wasn't my option? It was a story too long to tell, maybe I'll tell you in later chaptersーIf I recall.
I'm basically their slave that paid by money instead of food, water, and shelter.
Nothing more nothing less.
So don't be afraid if I can't hold my smile when speaking about that massacre. I'm not fond of the whole mystery behind that caseーno. I'm just glad that folk who are responsible for my fate are finally dead. That doesn't change my life whatsoever though. In fact, I was commanded to get on with my job immediately.
And back to our main focus, Poro.
He was my classmate.
Based on my perception towards him, being 3 months in the same class, before the massacre, as a mere acquaintance, he is just your everyday high school boy.
Even though he is kind of introverted, he never hates socializing with otherーhe just simply prefers solitude. Something worth mentioning so far, he is forte-ing in history and geographyーmost of the other subjects meanwhile, they're nothing to be proud of. That's it more or less.
That's really how plain he is.
Nothing remarkable about hisーoh, he's also wearing glasses like me, a full-rimmed one, in his case.
Aside from that, nothing else.
He was my boyfriend.
English is such a confusing language, the "was" in the earlier line could be interpreted differently. One might assume that he was my boyfriend in middle school and somewhere before the 2nd grade we broke up. Another one of you might be quite daring and conclude straight to the worst possible outcome, that he was deceased. While this is not so much a compliment, I personally don't see that as weird at allーIt's even somewhat admirable. Keep your expectation as low as possible and you won't be disappointed at whatever the result is, isn't it? Besides, it's just an assumption, it does zero harm to anyone.
Nonetheless, he was once my boyfriend, that's the fact you need to know so far. After all, I'm writing a story, not a Wikipedia page. But seriously, what's up with this abomination of a tense called "past tense"?
Just in case there's a non-native English speaker reading this book, I want to go to the very basic, so we have a common ground. One example in English, to refer to a deceased person you might want to use the past tense, especially when you referring to their very persona. On the other hand, you use "present tense" to mention their achievements.
He was a kind personーMakes sense since a dead person couldn't do anything but lying dead, thus why he is not able to act kind anymore, or anything generally speaking. Simply said, all of the things that require an action would be nullified from the present tense. Anything regarding those things would be removed from existence.
But we still recognize all of the ideas and legacies of the deceased by pairing them with the present tense. Benz is the inventor of the automobileーNothing in the world could change the fact that the automobile was invented by Benz even if the existence of his persona is nowhere to be found in this living world.
Following all this logic I couldn't keep my mind away why their name paired with "was"ーegoistic perhaps a perfect word for the person who created this rule.
Don't worry, I'm not going to judge you for following this rule. I just want to object to their ego with my ego
Wait, why did I assume that you already sympathize with me? My, my, I'm probably correct about I being an egoist.
Anyway, back to my egoisms.
Remember when you were born?
Heheh, that was a joke of course.
But seriously, your name was probably one of the first things that were given to you after your first breathーhell, some of you maybe already have a name while still in the womb. Now think of this, why did I able to pair the automobile with Benz? Because he has a name of course. Still don't believe me? I'll prove it.
Right? Their legacy just pop from your mind just after reading their name. Really easy, really simple, really short, simple yet efficient. Now let me do the otherwise in case you are still stubborn.
They are infamous for killing several Londoners, specifically women, in the late 19th century. Known for their brutal treatment of their victims' bodies by removing and tampering with their organs.
To be honest I don't know who they are.
For real, that's not a lie.
People knew them as Jack the Ripper but that's about it. No one until today sure what's their real name.
The culprit gave themself a new name instead.
Name is inevitable.
You see my point right? must I explain more than I should? That's why we have a name, no matter how boring your life is. You could say your name is a variable that is connected with your personality and legacy. When you mention certain information about a person you'll always depend on their name, even "He" and "She" do the same thing.
Then why is the use of past tense when they are dead socially acceptable?
If someone says his name was Bob when he died, then what's the point of his name being mentioned?
Bob's name will always be Bob. However, the "was" is nullifying the statement that comes after that.
Sure the person itself is the most important, then what's the point of a name?
It is what is visible with our eyes, just like the book cover and title.
Isn't that disrespectful for society and the deceased?
For a person like me?
Just because that person is dead his name is forgettable?
Including those murder' victims?
Sorry for the rant.
Maybe people were right when regarding teenage years as a rebelling phase.
Maybe I should keep obeying what people said.
Even if my life is in constant danger.
Even if my home could be gone anytime.
Even if the danger came from my own "people".
Maybe everyone else has the same problem with me deep down.
Maybe meeting him was fate after all.
...Knowing him really does open my mind in a certain way.
The phrase "Don't judge a book by its cover" exists for a reason. Every human being has a secret deep downーand in many cases best to keep it hidden. Not that I'm not aware of this human phenomenon before, I was a detective after all. For my job, the cover almost isn't meant anything but a mere ornament, there isn't anything to dig throughーof course, compared with its contents.
Talking to a person is more or less like reading a book, except you have to pry every page with a crowbar only to found all text covered with a black block (like those in lottery ticket) except for one sentenceーor word if you are unluckyーbut don't worry, if you pry them correctly then congrats, you got tiny sandpaper, which used to erase the block. You could sand them slowly if you want to waste your time, sand it too rough, however, you might destroy the book. Finally, just keep doing that until you are satisfied.
For the average person, they only do this of their will with mostly a minimal risk if it failed. But what I did until that time is a job, the difficulty is tenfolds and the failure cost is at least my own life.
And this is my story about reading a book with the title "Poro".