Chapter 1:

Built up Emotions - Chapter 1

My Smiling Boyfriend


                                       As I wake up to see that Hiro wasn't next to me.. again...
                                        I groan as I get up and see a note on my desk saying.

                                     "I'll be at my mom's house, she's sick be back at 6 -Hiro"

                                          Again.  it's like his mom is some virus or something
                                    that separates us more and more when she infects him.
                                 I chuckle at this thought yet I still feel like something's wrong

                                                                       "He'll never cheat.." 

                                           I doubted my own words but I just crumbled the note
                                                     and I went to the kitchen where I saw. 


                                       I wondered who made it until I saw another note saying.

                             "Sorry I was in a hurry, made you breakfast though! your fav enjoy -Hiro"

                                                                     "At least he made me food" 

                               I smile yet I still feel disappointed he wasn't here. I want him to be                                      here more, but I guess his mom is "sick" I groan but I couldn't resist Nigiri..                                  especially if it's by Hiro he always cooks good food, but I wish he could                                                be there to eat with me as we used too this is pointless 

                                                           "Why do you have to be so distant"

                                           I sigh but I just finished eating and got ready for school 
        I wish I could get ready with him like we used to.. he would always help me with my tie


                        I gave up on tying my tie and just started walking to school until Kiriyama
                           Walked with me  and asked where Hiro was, and why my tie was gone
                         I explained and she said she could do my tie but I declined by saying

                                                "Hiro just makes it more special now.."

                   She looked pissed yet she smiled and just wrapped her arms around my arm
           I ignored her then we entered the school and there I see Akoa so I ran towards him
                                          leaving Kiriyama alone at the front of the school

                                                                     "Finally I'm free"

                                                I breathed heavily as Akoa patted my back 

                     "why can't you just accept her man? she's kind and she's totally into you"

                          I laugh knowing that he's only saying that because she's his sister

                                                      "Oh sorry I'm not interested, and I'm loyal" 

                      "no pressure I know how much you love Hiro-Kun so I won't say anything"

                                    I chuckled as we started walking to our classroom

                              "By the way where's Hiro-kun anyways. I haven't seen him in weeks"

                                             Akoa suddenly blurted out  while we talked

                                 "His mom's been sick I don't know though I just...-"

                                           "W-w-wait- do you not trust him or something?"

                                       "i-i don't know I just feel like he's been distant lately.."

                       Akoa raised his eyebrow giving me a small frown but he still smiled at me
                         I felt terrible but I just continued walking until I heard the bell ring
                                      so I and Akoa separated and I entered my classroom

                                            "Why does he have to be so distant nowadays.."  

                    I get lost in this thought not noticing sensei calling me asking if I was ok 

                                                                         "Hikhoro Tutsaya!"

                                                               Startled I asked what he needed 

                                                                              "Y-yes sensei?"

                                                  "Go to the nurse Muiko's office you look tired"

                                                                               "Yes, s-sensei!"

                    As I walked to the nurse's office I noticed Rokuku Walk into the nurse's office
                       so I wondered if she knew what Hiro's been doing so I walked in knowing
                                                     I was supposed to go there anyways


                                                                  She turned around and waved

                                                        "Tutsaya senpai What are you doing here?"

                                                    I waved back and waved at the nurse miss Muiko

                                             "Sensei told me to go here then I saw you walk in oh and-"

                                                      "you both should sit down, you'll get tired kids"

                                               Nurse Muiko Said, so we sat down on the infirmary bed

                                                                    "Continue now Tutsaya senpai"

                                                 "Do you know what Hiro's been doing these past weeks?"

                                                                       "O-oh he didn't tell you?" 

                                                  O got shocked at how her face changed and how 
                                                              she looked like she was about to cry

                                                                        "Did something happen??"

                                                         "His brother Haroto d-died in a c-car accident-t"

                                    I was shocked at the fact that Hiro never told me.. but the fact that                                                                           Rokuku-Chan was crying.. got me confused

                                                     "Rokuku-chan? did you know Hiro's brother?"

                                    "He was my boyfriend.. but I never thought it would end like this..."

                                                            "I am so sorry I said that rokuku-chan.."

                       I hugged her because she was crying so much, I told her to lay down and I told                                                    the nurse to take care of her for me as I left the room                                                                                                             it was already 7:54 pm

                            I went home thinking about it as I walked home I saw Hiro doing something                                                           outside our door speaking to himself about something

                                                               "Don't cry.. you don't want him to worry.."

                                              I just listened in shock as I hid behind the gate of our house

                                            "I wonder if he notices I'm distant.. does he even care.."

                     I just stood there as I hear the door open and I walked out from my hiding place

                                                                  "Is that really how he thinks.."

               I walk into the house and I finally see his face while he took off his mask and hoodie

                                                                          "oh hey Saya-Kun"

                                      I just stood there not responding, he notices and walked
                                                       up towards me and asked if I was ok


                                         I hugged him tightly and he dropped his hoodie on the floor

                                                           "I know what happened to your brother"

                                                             "H-hah... what d-do you mean haha.."

                                      I hugged him tighter not letting go yet not too tight I felt water                                                                                                  dripping on my left shoulder 

                                                                            "H-hah! I'm c-crying"

                                                                     "It's normal Hiro, just cry.."

                                    "I-i have too many emotions i-i don't know how to e-express"

                              I patted his back and hugged him tighter as I hear him sniffling on my                                                                   shoulder so I told him to rest in my bedroom

                                                               "I'm gonna go sleep on the couch"

                                                             as I said that I felt a tug on my sleeve

                               "S-stay... we haven't slept in the same bed in months it was my fault too.."

                                         I was shocked yet I smiled and kissed him on the forehead

                                                         "Sure I'm just gonna go get some pillows"

                                He nods and hugs a pillow covering his face as I went to get the pillow


           He's asleep... I smiled and just cuddled up to him from the back and I hugged him tight


                                          And I fell asleep hugging him close for the first time in months
                                                           I hope he'll still be here with me tomorrow...