Chapter 28:
ALTaccounti's Roasting Book! (Reopened)
Parody summary:
For only one night every year, on July 7th at 6 PM after the usual daily to Hentai session, gates to other worlds open all around joe mama.. I mean Shibuya, Tokyo. However it isn't 300 year old loli waifu's, lovely furry hybrid gals or juicy shotas that come trough those gates. It's the snobby little shits that think they are the real deal just because they have 1 more cent on their bank account then yours, you guessed it they are Royal Families and their kingdoms of other worlds, and they have arrived in Japan to flex on the poor during the summer festival!
"This Year Again, We Flex On The Poor" follows 3 people that should not become heirs by any means (because else their empire will go to shit) Fior Deniev heir to some random mountains since they can't entrust him with the Deniev Empire, Alistar Vermillon the prince of wannabe steampunk-like island Kingdom of I played Cyberpunk 2077 once and now based my whole island around it and Veil Eden, the princess of the plain as fuck just like her looks Chartreuse Kingdom.
Able to only reunite once a year, since dimension travel is even too expensive for rich people, Fior, Alistar and Veil make a most out of a night out of the royal court life before going back as probably still a virgin to their worlds at midnight, but as they grow older and closer to succeeding the throne, they must learn how not to be beta cucks and manage a damn kingdom, and again since all of them are beta cucks their friendship is severely effected.
Will they ever manage to grow into decent people? Read " This Year Again, We Flex On The Poor" to find out!
(Its been a while since I have roasted I hope I can still do justice!)
Prologue (Chap 0)
We open the chapter by some 9 year old snot called Fior Deniev that instintly starts complaining that its stuffy (tf does that even mean) she is lost and hungry. She is at the weeb festival and complains that its hot and bla bla my kingdom is cold we wear fur-coat made by the fur from furries and her parents thought it was a good idea to let her 9 year old child wear a TANKTOP LIKE YOU BASICALLY ASKING PEDOS TO KIDNAP HER!!! Her parents are so stupid that I secretly think that they are fukin dinosaurs in disguise!!
Yada yada she went to the pawn shop where the owner told her that her empire's currency is absolute dogshit and left the place to look at the Japanese doing typical cringe stuff. Btw she is still hungry asf but guess what? We do not care XD (lmao I am so rude, but too bad you signed up for it). She started crying because she a beta female who needs that Daddy energy which is sus but we don't judge.
Typical young boy comes to save her trope, I know the boy is smart by saving her, by saving her he can maybe get guaranteed coochie in the future to avoid the beta cuck lifestyle. But in fact another girl was behind the boy so he is planning for a future 3some, anyways the girl is from a kingdom that Fior's empire is at war against. I hope the girl's empire wins screw Fior she is ass!
The boy said that after crying like a little bitch that you need to consume sugar, which is his dad's advice, he probably got that from watching his wife cry at korean drama shows while consuming Ben & Jerry's.
17 year old Fior has them nostalgia goggles on looking at the past, but none of that matters since her incompetent ass caused some big brain trouble, but what I don't know.
chap 1
Some info I don't give a shit about.
Fior was just sanding around until 2 grannies wanted to kidnap her and yeet her at the police station because she doesn't have Asian eyes, therefor is considered a lost person. The sheer stupidity of these babbas make me wanna commit neckrope lmao.
At this point from Alistar perspective she is getting overpowered by hurny grannies that want some of that foreigner booba XD. DAYUM he used solar flare to blind da ladies and escape he is contender to get some of that F-chans coochie juice, I can feel him escaping the beta cuck fate already (at least I hope so he is my fav character for now)
Nvm Alistar used some flash bomb their kingdom must be modern Call of Duty level lmao.
bla bla pawn shop sht bla bla conflicts between empires because fuck peace yada yada, listen Bitch we do not care go cope loser!
NEXT!
chap 2
Some description about tokyo that we don't give a sht about, bruh each time Fior is in Japan, she sounds like a weeb that wasted all his life savings just getting there, cumming at each step since he is walking on Japanese grounds, as if that had some special thingy going on lmao XD.
Oh she has a brother called Erik okie and he is talented. Of course Foir being the black sheep because she's dumb asf, uglier than my imaginary 500 pounds gf and not worthy of the throne since her future being a beta cuck.
NVM FIOR IS A DUDE THE SUMMARY DIDN'T TELL ME!!!! LMAO
Ight Fior x Alistar gay fanfic here we GOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
But for real who names their male child Fior? Bruh parents hoped to get a trap but got a normal boy instead, damn must they have been sad. Fior is basically a incompetent bastard that can't run a kingdom and will also be a beta cuck for sure, I guess these fools will never be able to out run their fate.
bla bla politcs bla bla Foir got threatend, everybody is horny for Erik yada yada A new hot lady called Irette showed up.
NEXT!!!
chap 3
Alistar is being a degenerate weeb while never having touched anime and manga, building models.
bla bla kingdom history, if there is one thing I don't care about its that. YAWWNNNNNNNN YALL ARE FUKIN BORING!!!!
YOOOO A 12 YEAR OLD BOY BATH SCENE THIS AUTHOR IS DOWN BADDDDDDD!!!!!!!! TOUCH SOME GRASS DUDE!! UWU XD LMAO.
lol the kingdom being kinda modern is pretty cool tbh ngl.
Alistar thinking of Veil and Fior and coping that he is a only child, how about you grow up a bit more and try to seduce Fior because homiesexual is the new meta, if you ever need a child just ask Vell to be the birthmother 0-0 *Insert skull emoji*
NEXT!
chap 4
Finally Vell's perspective who has she simp for that is question all I care about lets see who it is!
Vell has a sick sister:
We don't care + cope + ratio + L + I know you didn't ask but I don't care + seethe + virgin + beta + cuck + you suck ass!
Bruh I don't care about tea parties and your whole palace life JUST TELL ME WHO YOU ARE INTO!!!!
BRO ALL THIS BORING TALK I DO NOT FUKIN CARE DUCHESS WHATEVER SUCK DEZ NUTS YOU ARE MID ASF AND I AM NOT INTERESTED IN YOU!!!!!
(The chapters are getting longer and longer and its giving me chronic depression)
omg Vell is reading a book to Filaine the sick bish I have no interest in PLEASE STOP BORING ME OUT YALL ROYAL CUCKS NEED TO GET MORE INTERESTING LIVES, LIKE GO OUTSIDE ON A DAILY BASIS AND NOT ONLY ONCE A YEAR AT A WEEB FESTIVAL!!! jeSUS!!!!!
Bruh getting hyped again at going to the festival BRO YOU HAVE BEEN TO THE SAME FUKIN PLACE FOR YEARS!!!! DAYUM!!! Like what about Canada, Murica (You don't really want to visit the 2nd one but its just a suggestion.) heck Europe, South America, but why the same place again and again mannnnn..... these royals are weeaboo asf and they don't even know it.
FINALLY I AM FUKIN DONE!!!!! YESSSSSSSS!!!!!
Final Review:
This story is basically what if isekai is reverse and its more boring than a history class given by 80 year old grandma that does not even want to be here. I would rather read Dr. Seuss because even that shit is more exiting than this, heck Redo of a Realer is a masterpiece compared to this garbage. Author was probably imaging life in tokyo, while not having gone outside for at least 6 months go outside and touch some grass.
Trash Reserve Isekai/10 would rather commit reverse living then read this again!
XD XD XD XD XD XD XD XD XD XD JK JK JK JK JK JK JK!
Okay for real though this story is not bad it has some good worldbuilding, characters and a plot which gets more explored with each chapter, but this is just not a cup of tea since all kingdom politics and some of the character interaction were like a chore for me, still if you like reserve isekai with an once a year portal hop for a few hours, then this is for you!
P.S: If you want to enter too, please apply at the form!
P.S.S: (I got nothing to say I am suffering from exam fatigue)
Now see ya at the next reactionary/roast chapter!
Author Link: https://www.honeyfeed.fm/u/5766
ALTaccounti's Roasting Book The Game
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Pro tip: Did you know that it takes ALTaccounti 2 to 5 hours for every review, where after he questioned for why we are still here? The answer being just to suffer?
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