Are You There, God? It's Me, Reese

October 11

My name is Reese Winters. I'm 13 years old, I go to Rhodes Middle School, blah blah blah. When I was a little girl, me and my brother Murphy wanted to see the world. Mexico, Japan, Europe, Russia, France. All of it. He was gonna become a hit chart-topping DJ and take me to festivals all around the world. We dreamed more than anyone else could dream.

Of course, that did not happen for several reasons. One is that I got tired because my friends kept joking around that France " doesn't exist ". I don't get it. But the other was Murphy. He was a DJ. He'd been DJ'ing since he was 7 years old, so he'd be 18 by now. Used to be, he did a lot of family barbecues, my birthday parties, HIS birthday parties, basically any family gathering, he was there scratchin' records. One time, he was performing at my 3rd grade ball, and some boys slipped him some records that had some...very bad, adults only rap songs. When they came on, everyone was singing along to them. It was hilarious.

Now, when he wasn't at family gatherings, he was performing at clubs around town. I couldn't get in (duh) so I watched him on the local news and online. One day, he told me he was playing a " secret set " somewhere in Texas. I could only tell my mom, dad, and my older sister Britt about it. The set was really late at night and all of us were gathered around my dad's computer to watch the live stream. We had a lot of fun sitting back and watching his live stream. My father had to keep shielding my eyes when the camera was on some...really interesting looking clothes on some of the girls (and guys) there. Now that was funny. After the last song, the stream cut off and we all went to bed, knowing he'd be back in the morning.

And...he wasn't.

We assumed that he'd just gotten hung over and someone would call for us to pick him up, which my dad scolds him constantly about. We still called him anyhow. Nothing. We call his friends. Nothing. The guy streaming the event from last night. Nothing. The little record label he'd just signed up for that had kept him so busy lately.

Nothing.

We called the police to search through the city to try and find him somewhere. They looked all over downtown and everywhere in between trying to find my brother. He'd vanished without a trace. Murphy Winters had officially gone missing.

It took me a month for my family to get over it. I had to keep getting pulled out of class because I'd start crying out of nowhere thinking about him. Mom started overeating a bit. Some of Dad's plants died because of neglect. Fortunately, after a bit, we were able to at least eat with each other at the table again. Well, everyone except my sister. She was so mad and sad at the same time, I got scared thinking about what she was gonna do to herself. Dad says she's going through some " changes " in her life, and that I was gonna have to go through that soon too. If that's what that looks like...I don't wanna think about it. I don't even know if Dad's telling me everything.

I found out about this city from a Youtube video my friend told me about. I was incredibly desperate at the time and I had to do something. So, after a long process involving me having to deal with mom screaming at me, I managed, somehow, to get my friend’s mom Jasmine, who was a cop, to take me.

This has been a really long day. And I’m not happy about it.

Let me tell you about the city first: it's called Los Riveracci. There’s a lot of “ cool kids “ there with really big bikes and jackets and they walk around with greaser haircuts and mohawks and chains all around their necks, and they're blasting all that rock and hip hop that my sister always listened to (that my parents wanted turned down). Britt would’ve loved to see a place like this. She was always nervous about hanging around most of the kids at my school, so a place like this would be so cool to her. I started snapping pictures of the buildings with giant album advertisements on them and all the people walking by. Some of them played into it, but a lot were really rude and pointed their middle finger at me. One yellow suited guy was getting dragged by his collar across the street. His clothes were all burnt and stuff. Yikes.

I was so excited at the time that we hit a speed bump and my head hit the roof of the car. Ow. Mrs. Chen reminded me what my mission was about.

" Now, we don't want you losing your phone, okay? That could've easily been dropped out of the window and stolen on the fly. I get that this place looks cool to a kid like you, but as a cop, I am under intense scrutiny to carry my duty out, especially in a ghetto like this. "

Boooooomer. I didn't tell her this, but it was just funny how she was so worried about me that she used words like " scrutiny ".

Anyways, Los Riveracci. It's divided into four little " sectors ". One for living there, one for tech...companies, I guess? Alright. There's also a Farmer's Market, surprisingly, and one district that, when you bring it up, people just tell you " don't do it, man. Cockroaches. " They always say " cockroaches " whenever you bring it up. I'll just assume it's as shabby as they say. For once, I'm “ inclined “ to agree with Mrs. Chen.

My stomach growled. " Maaaan, " I groaned in the car, " Can we get something to eat, first, Mrs. Chen? I'm tired and my child body needs energyyyyy. "

" Well....I guess food is important if you wanna survive too. You brought snacks, didn't you? "

" Yeah...cheese crackers, fruit snacks, fruit cocktail, all the things Mom would prefer I packed...but do those REALLY compare to like...a burger or something? "

" I'm not pulling money that deep just to get you food. Well, not right now. Make sure you don't run out of snacks, alright? Don't eat everything at once, and don't starve yourself just to save on food, either, okay? "

I sighed and pulled out some of the fruit snacks. Yum. " So what kind of people are we looking for to ask about Murphy? "

Mrs. Chen turned to me. " That's what I want to know. Do you think anyone here can give you a clue? "

I looked around for a few brief seconds before thinking. " No....I don't know if anyone- "

That’s when I remember. The DJ he talked about...the mysterious...DJ CJ.

" Yes! Yes! DJ CJ! She's a DJ who Murphy talked about. He says she's really mysterious, and if my brother went somewhere like here, she might be near him andprobablyonadatewithhimrightnow. " I blurted that last sentence out having almost choked on my fruit snacks.

" Alright, DJ CJ, huh? Alright, who do you think would know about DJ CJ? "

" Hold on, I'm smart, I'm smart...she might be...somewhere in a reeeeeally mysterious place. "

" Very specific. "

" Like...hm....didn't they say...that Sector...Four. But, they said it's really dangerous... "

" You know what, Reese? I'm a certified officer. I have my gun, I have my badge, and that’s all that matters. I've been trained in karate since I was 9, Brazilian Jiu-jitsu since I was 13, Aikido since I was in college, and I'm studying tai-chi and capoeira at this moment in time. "

" How...how do you have time for all this? " I asked, raising an eyebrow.

" Instructors at the station. I help with them for new recruits every day. Oh, and can you keep a secret? "

" What? "

She slid a picture out from the car's glove compartment and showed me a picture of some woman wearing a glittery purple singlet and white boots. Her mask was white and purple, too. Now I wish I could tell everyone who Mrs. Chen really used to be.

I slipped the photo back into the glove compartment for safe keeping. Just for her anyhow.

The car pulled into Sector 4 as I took a deep breath and shifted a little in my seat. This was definitely " cockroaches ". Everything was so dark and rundown. Mom says this is what California looks like.

There weren’t many people there. We didn't see a single person for like, 20 minutes trying to look for her before we found a small pack of boys standing around. They look like some of the high schoolers I see Britt walk past sometimes. She kept driving, but I could see the boys behind her following her around. Every turn we took, there wasn't a single empty alley without one of those gang members sitting around. Some of them were just squinting at us while others were just chuckling it off.

That's when suddenly someone just LEAPED out in front of us and straight up hit the hood of Mrs. Chen's car. She slammed the breaks before getting out to check the injured person. She was a really friendly person and hated seeing people get hurt.

" Damn it! Sir, are you alright?! " As she turned him over, him being another one of those idiots from earlier, we heard someone call out to us.

" Yo, what the HELL, you fuckin’ pig?!? That was my boy, and you KILLED 'em, bruh!! What is UP, bruh?! "

Some blonde haired frat boy chuckled alongside his other friends, patting each other on the back. Did they...throw him into this? Why was that?

A few more of the same punks rolled up to chuckle and sarcastically frown at us. I didn't feel at risk, but I didn't feel safe either. I slowly merged with the floor of the car, unbuckling my seat belt. I could hear Mrs. Chen talk to those punks.

" I've seen those mannerisms before, young man. Why are you sacrificing your own frie- "

Bang. A gunshot went off. I yelped. I couldn't hear a single voice for the next 10 seconds except for more gunshots and hearing something, or someone, tumble to the ground. I prayed it wasn't Mrs. Chen. I could hear some boy-ish screams ring out, so it looked like she was okay. I heard feet scattering and running away. Fortunately, it looked like Mrs. Chen drove off the attackers. I peeked my head back up as sweat ran down my forehead.

She was okay. Thank goodness. Except for her clutching her arm, she was completely unharmed. Wait, why was she clutching her arm?

She stumbled back to her car and slipped into the driver's seat. " Let's...let's keep going. "

I wanted to find Murphy badly, but I couldn't help but panic when I saw her arm, which was dripping blood every second. " M-Mrs. C-Chen, but- "

" I learned-urgh-to tie tourniquets in college. There's a first aid kit...parallel to my seat, underneath. " I grabbed the white handle peeking out from underneath and quickly ripped it out, placing it on the middle console. She opened it with her good arm and grabbed some white cloth, quickly wrapping it around her wound. I almost shrieked when she uncovered it. A gunshot wound. Something I’d literally never seen before. I panicked again before Mrs. Chen had to keep assuring me to breath. I did. A lot. I could still feel a few nervous tears falling down my face. It really sucked.

Good thing it was only getting worse from there.

At that point, I just wanted out of that sector. I swore to Mom and Dad I was going to make it back alive. Not like this. Not like this. Not like this. Sis and mom would lose their minds if they saw her here. I silently cried more and more. I turned my head and closed my eyes.

While I had a billion anxious thoughts flying by me, I had no choice but to keep breathing as Mrs. Chen started driving again, this time using only one hand to steer and going a little slower than before. I could feel the car swerving left and right quite a bit. She turned to me. " You've never seen a gunshot wound before...? " I shook my head from left to right, keeping my gaze away from the wound.

" I thought I'd...at least had someone to protect me today, " I said. " But...not even you could get out of that...without being... "

" Reese...this is the last time I am going to tell you. I am a trained police officer. I've seen my allies get shot down just as much as I've seen their killers. Whatever happens at the end of today, we're going to find Murphy and we're going to get him home. We can't control our emotions, but we can absolutely control our reactions. But...if you need to cry, I'm in no position to stop you right now. As long as you know it's okay, I don't care. Go ahead. "

So, I did. I did cry. I wailed just a bit. I tightened up. Through all of it, I knew to follow what Mrs. Chen was saying. I need to keep my head up through all of it. That's all that mattered, and nothing more.

10 minutes later. I'd cried out everything, we'd driven through the whole sector. Not a clue on where CJ was. I'd seen so many dark buildings and cobwebs that I swore I was locked in my grandfather's basement. Not that I would know what that was like. It's not what you think it is. Anyways.

We could both hear voices coming out from near a worn-down forum of stores. Mrs. Chen tightened her wheel again. The car slowed down as Mrs. Chen got out her gun. I slid back to the floor again. We hear something click, along with a few giggles and shouts. I couldn't make out a word of it, but we could hear it again a few seconds later. Someone yelled something in Spanish and ran out. It's one of those boys. Again. This time, he had a gun too.

Time for another gun fight. I yelped louder and breathed in and out in rapid succession. Mrs. Chen ducked and got out of the car. " Stay right where you are!! " she yelled. So I did. But I couldn't bear to just hear all that gunfire and not know what happened. I peeked up to wade just some of my anxiety. I saw Mrs. Chen get behind the car and start firing at the boys again. They were fast, but so was Mrs. Chen. Neither of them were getting a single shot in. There were lots of boxes and buildings to hide behind, and Mrs. Chen was smart enough to use them and avoid the gun fire. Unfortunately, so were those boys. Mrs. Chen was firing from above so she could try and ward them off with falling debris. So, the boys were jumping over it and tried to knife her, which she rolled out of the way off and punched them square in the head. They hit her back with punches, and so the two just...kept punching each other. A lot. Mrs. Chen wasn't bothered a bit by it, but the boy had this weird smile on his face that creeped me out. He was warded off as Mrs. Chen grabbed his collar and threw him to the ground.

As she did that, more boys with guns shot at her. A shot grazed her shoulder as I screamed again. Not again, not again, breath, Reese, breath. Breathing worked this time as she fired back as they got hit without dying and ran off. That was it, the fight was over...until Mrs. Chen did something I totally didn't expect. She lifted up pieces of rock by her side and started chucking them at the punks. I guess she really wanted them to answer for their crimes. I mean, what can't Mrs. Chen do? She's awesome. At least, now I know she is.

She was about to slip back into her car when we heard another gunshot, but this time it wasn't from someone in the front. " SURPRISE, BITCH!!! " the boy yelled as he ran up to hit her with the knife. I gulped and fell to the floor again, ready to accept that Mrs. Chen was going to get hurt again.

That’s when I heard/saw feet dropkicking the guy. I didn't hear any sort of...uh...stabbing noises. A kick hit his knife as it fell out of his hand.

I peeked and then tripped again as someone literally jumped onto the hood of our car. Mrs. Chen and I stumbled back in shock as she aimed her gun at them. I could see they were wearing a black suit, and their face was covered by long red hair. One of the boys started talking smack to them. " The fuck is dis?! " he. " We got the Knights of Ragnarok?! Hell naw, I ain’t scared of you!! get the fuck outta here!!! FIRE!! "

I just wrote a swear word. Great.

He started firing away at them, and I could hear the guys in the back scream at him not to fire. They looked very panicked to see her. I saw them crack their knuckles as soon as he yelled “ fire “. They started throwing punches directly at the bullets, DEFLECTING EVERY SINGLE BULLET THEY FIRED. They all flew out into the distance as the boys were silent. A few seconds later was when they would start running away screaming. Well, except for one.

That brash dude with the stupid blonde faded hair pointed his gun at them. " You wanna step up, huh?! "

The girl nodded and calmly held her fists in front of them. I couldn't see it then, but a stern look was on her face. The boy was visibly frustrated and fired right as the girl ran at him, dodging all of his shots and running faster. She got close and kicked the gun high into the air, elbowing the man in the stomach. He gasped and shrieked angrily and threw a punch at her. This was deflected with her other hand as she grabbed his wrist and spun the boy to the ground, grabbing the gun in the air, and pointing it at his face.

He kicked her away and ran at her with his fists before she outright threw her gun at his head and kicked him in the head again before hitting him with more across his entire body. The boy tried throwing punches at her, but she dodged every single one so gracefully. She smoothly swung a punch at his rougher, more direct punches to throw him off guard. It looked like she'd trained in martial arts for a while now. She caught his fist again with a forearm and kicked him in the head one more time, this time letting him stumble around drooling before he hit the ground.

She laid still, ashes falling from her fists before she sighed and put it away carefully, her dark red hair flowing in the wind. " Every week we tell these kids you can’t win against us, and sure enough... " I heard her say as I got out of the car.

" Ho...ly...crap, that was AMAZING!! " I yelled as Mrs. Chen was boggled by all of this, lying against the front of the car. She squinted as the stranger turned around.

" Ma'am, can I ask…your name before anything else? " Mrs. Chen said.

" Trina, " she replied. “ I’m in the Knights of Ragnarok. More importantly, are you two okay? “

I was a bit taken aback at the name. “ The Knights of…whaaaa? Don’t know what that is, but that sounds awesome. “

Her eyes widened. “ Are you…are you new here…? What the hell is a kid like you doing in Los Riveracci?! “

“ Well, u-uh…there’s someone I’m looking for… “

“ Little girl, you could’ve sent anyone to come find them, and you went in there yourself?! “

“ I-I’m sorry, I just…he’s the only sibling I ever talk to anymore a-and- “

“ You could’ve been killed SECONDS ago! What the hell is wrong with you kids these days?! I swear, I don’t know why children aren’t just banned here outright…. “

“ I’m not a child, I-I’m 13!! “

“ So it’s a typical teen runaway case. “ She walked over to me. “ Listen, this is the last place you want to be if you’re a runaway. We need to get you out of here now before you end up shot and killed like your police friend. “

“ Shot and…b-but you made it out alive! Right? “ I turned to Jasmine. “ …J-Jasmine? “

Everything began to sink in. Jasmine wasn’t moving. Her eyes weren’t blinking. The blood on her shirt had dried up. Something was up. I started to get a little panicked and ran by her side. I shook her. I shook her violently.

“ Jasmine…Jasmine….g-get up! Please!....Jasmine…nononono…. “

I tried to deny it multiple times. I asked her multiple times to get up, to say something. I turned to Trina multiple times, telling her she was okay. She didn’t say a word. I stopped speaking and just started mumbling. Then I started crying. I started crying a lot. That was the plot twist all along, guys. Jasmine is dead. Shot up by some stupid thugs. I hugged her. She wasn’t gonna hug back, but I didn’t care. I’m weeping into her dead chest. I was screaming so badly. I started slumping to the ground. I’m pretty sure Trina took pity on me as she started walking over to me and kneeling down.

“ I wanna go home…I WANNA GO HOME!!!! “

Trina shook her head, reaching her hand out. I stared at it before I tried slapping it away. When my hand hit hers, she wouldn’t let go. “ GET YOUR HAND AWAY FROM ME!! “

Trina didn’t smile at me, but she helped me up as I struggled, staring at her as I felt myself calming down. She sighed.

“ …fine. Let’s go find your brother. “