Canto X: Requiescat in Pace

All seemed well in the world, many people thought! Fetail's little issue had been solved, so she had been able to return to her body. Imperator had opened her restaurant, and it was a huge hit with the villagers and both Magical Girl households… Even though Imperator left most of her work to her subordinates.

Meanwhile, Godofreda had been growing closer to Olivia and Fetail, much to the latter's exasperation.

Voytek had realised something was wrong with Zarambria: That she wasn't fully gone! She had vowed to keep her under control. Olivia had been practising baseball with some kids in the village, and her dream seemed to be getting closer to completion. The Briareo-Ascalón-Weathersby household's newest members had settled in nicely, and were now an integral part of the village.

In addition, Hadrinyan’s efforts had apparently worked , and the Mi-Go plot had seemingly been halted for the moment.

Not only that, but the international Magical Girl Conflict had settled down, with all parties finally coming to an agreement to cooperate and to avoid further conflicts between them. Thus, the world cried out in joy:

The year's at the spring

And day's at the morn;

Morning's at seven;

The hill-side's dew-pearled;

The lark's on the wing;

The snail's on the thorn:

God's in his heaven—

All's right with the world!

However, some didn't partake in the celebrations, nor did they chant the old poem’s lines : They felt that the conflict wasn't over yet, but merely slumbering, or that it was the prelude to something bigger. As far as Fetail knew, two individuals in Olivia's household had their suspicions: Godofreda, who could feel that something was wrong, but couldn't put her finger on it. It was mostly her rather refined animal instinct telling her so.

And the other member was Fetail herself, of course: Ever the pessimist, she didn’t trust the way things had ended. There had to be something else to the situation, someone or something must have been behind it! To the girl's chagrin, Chicxulub wouldn't answer Fetail's questions about the situation and refused to do anything which would give her any hints, citing a non-disclosure agreement.

"Haaaah. What a pain that is to be alive in such bizarre times. Professor, have you spotted anything yet?" Fetail had decided to continue the exploration of her Trapdoor Dimension. Perhaps she'd find something interesting which would aid her.

This time, she wasn't alone: She had brought Godofreda along, just in case. Her secret base ended up being not so secret, but Godofreda had pledged not to tell anybody else. And she would keep her word.

"Nope, Clocky: It's just spruce trees here!" They were exploring an area past the jungle: A forest which was mainly made out of spruce trees. To Fetail's surprise, it had a fair amount of animals in it: Deer, moose, birds, hares… She had barely seen any on her previous trips.

"Haaaah. Godofreda, you're heavy. Can't you walk?"

"Nope, I mustn’t get injured here, with such treacherous terrain! And this spot is excellent for scouting, apart from being very comfy!"

Even though she was a Magical Girl, Fetail was feeling the strain of piggybacking her swimsuit-wearing friend, who was in turn carrying a heavy backpack on her bag: Godofreda was not a Magical Girl, so she still needed to eat and drink. The bag also carried other items like maps, flashlights, and first-aid kits.

"Come on, Clocky! You're a strong girl: You can do this!" Godofreda cheered her on as they advanced through the forest, avoiding the occasional fallen tree or protruding root: That was Godofreda had been talking about when she mentioned treacherous terrain. They'd been in the forest for one hour or so, and Godofreda felt like eating a snack.

So she patted Fetail’s ears. ‘’Clocky, don’t you feel like eating a snack? Come on, let’s stop!’’

The fox girl didn’t want her friend to starve to death, so she stopped. Godofreda leapt off her back and landed on the ground, where she stretched a bit and then dashed to sit on a big rock not far away from them. ‘’Clocky, I found a great spot! Come on!’’

‘’Don’t call me Clocky… Never mind, it’s a pretty good nickname. " The lazy fox-girl joined her friend on the rock. "It sure is peaceful here, I sure hope nothing unexpected happens." Fetail said while taking a chocolate cookie from the cookie jar Godofreda was holding, and then munching on the brown cookie. "You jinxed it, Clocky! Now something wacky and terrible is going to happen!’’

Fetai didn’t reply, instead choosing to look at the birds in the trees around them. ‘’Haaaah. Professor, don’t you find it strange how things have fizzled out?’’

‘’It sure is strange, Clocky! It’s disappointing and boring! Come on, throw something fun our way, fate!’’ Godofreda ate another cookie and watched her friend slam her left foot against the ground.

‘’Cazzo. Godofreda, something or someone is interfering with the future by neutralising these conflicts. What a pain to deal with, I want to go home and sleep it off. But…’’ Fetail looked at the ground, watching a squirrel dart by.

Godofreda gently patted her friend’s head and finished the phrase for her after eating a few more cookies. ‘’It’s personal for you, isn’t it? The future is your turf, after all!’’

Fetail nodded and looked at Godofreda: ‘’Haaaah. Goddamn right it’s personal! I am the moocher from the future, Clockwise Fetail: Anyone who interferes with my sphere of work should drop dead.’’

‘’Well said, Clocky! Now, let’s drink a bit and continue our walk: It’s an adventure with my best friend, how exciting!’’

Godofreda then took a sip from a bottle of water, and passed it to Fetail, who drank a bit without touching the bottle’s lip. ‘’Aw, Fetail! You’re such a meanie sometimes. You avoided my indirect kiss, which I prepared with much love!’’

Godofreda, looking quite displeased, pulled on Fetail’s tails, put their things back in her bag, and climbed onto her friend’s back. With that, Fetail walked on through the forest. ‘’Why do you keep rejecting me, Fetail? Is there something I’m doing wrong? Why won’t you fall for me?!’’ Godofreda asked, recalling the countless times her advances had failed. It went way beyond being stubborn or not being interested in romance: There had to be another reason!

Godofreda was growing more annoying for each second Fetail spent in silence. Thus, to calm her down, Fetail would have to respond in kind. "’Haaaaaaaaaaaah.’’ She let out a long sigh and pulled on Godofreda’s tail. Hard. ‘’Ouch! What was that for, dumb fox?!’’ Godofreda headbutted her friend from her position, but Fetail walked on without even wobbling a bit. ‘’You’re so hard-headed, Fetail. But that’s part of your charm!’’ Godofreda started rubbing Fetail’s ears, causing her to jump: That almost sent them both crashing down to the ground.

Fetail was very sensitive there, and she wouldn’t allow such a slight to go unpunished. So Fetail restrained her friend with her tails, imitating the crucifiction of Jesus. ‘’You won’t drink from the same bottle as me, but you’ll faux-crucify me with what equates to gooey tentacles. You really like doing this, don’t you? You’re a weird one, Clocky! And that’s one of the many reasons I like you so much!’’

Fetail had reached the limit of her tolerance, so she put her friend on her back again and started speaking. "’You know my goal, Goddy. Immortality… Haaah. Life is so short. Tell me, Goddy: What will happen if I reach my goal?"

Godofreda replied, a sad expression on her face: ‘’I understand… You’d have to watch everyone else go, right? And you don’t want to get too attached to anyone just in case you accomplish your goal. So why don't you make all your friends immortal? That way we won't have to be separated!" There was a ray of hope, Godofreda believed.

Fetail shook her head. "Haaaah. You're too optimistic, Goddy. If that happened, everyone would demand to have their friends and family made immortal, and it would all be an utter mess and a huge pain to deal with. Besides, I don't even know if it's possible, and the things I'm trying out are dangerous and probably fatal for human beings. You wouldn't drink mercury, would you? You don't want to float around in space after the Sun destroys the Earth, right?" Fetail then swallowed a mercury pill.

"I understand, Fetail. I'm sorry for being so annoying sometimes. But I really do like you, and I'm not going to give up! I'm just going to try even harder and enjoy all the time I spend with you!" Godofreda declared that and raised a fist into the air. "Witness me, Clocky!"

Fetail sighed. "Haaaah. You're a really lively girl, Goddy. So take care of yourself, ok? I have to act like a Magical Girl sometimes, and since most of it is a pain, giving advice is the most I’m usually willing to do. And being Hadrian's Supervisor too. It isn’t going that badly: She is learning quite well… I’m teaching her how to get maximum results with minimum effort. Perhaps I should teach you too.’’

Godofreda nodded and leaned her head against Fetail's. "Thank you, Clocky, you're the best! I’ll take care of myself and ask you for advice when I need to. Can I ask you for romantic advice, then? Can I?’’ She was smiling broadly, happy at being with her best friend.

‘’You may not, Miss Wegener. I will not stoop that low. Haaaah. I don’t feel like giving romantic advice: Not now, not ever…’’ The forest ended and gave way to a rocky plain which had little in terms of fauna or flora. But the pair were not paying attention to that: They were looking at something unexpecting in the middle of the plains: A cemetery on a hill. ‘’It looks like a Baroque-period cemetery. I saw an identical site in Střílky, in the Czech Republic. Good stuff. I mean, look at those sandstone walls!’’ Godofreda remarked and patted her friend’s back. ‘’It looks interesting, right? Historical architecture is cool, isn’t it? For me, it was either archaeology, geology or architecture, and I chose archaeology: My parents and older sister would have rather seen me as a geologist, but I prefer archaeology! I wish they'd leave the Black Forest more often, though…"

Fetail looked quite surprised at the presence of the building. ‘’This means that we’re not alone here. Cazzo, there goes my idea of fun.‘’ Her surprise had turned to annoyance.

Godofreda got off her friend’s back and sniffed the ground. ‘’I can pick up somebody’s scent. Let’s go!’’ The pair approached the site with caution, with Godofreda leading the charge.

They went up the steps which led to the entrance of the cemetery, and they walked across the path which led to the chapel at the end, looking at the lavish decorations which the place contained. The inscriptions on the graves were almost unreadable, but the pair of friends still took a moment to mourn those buried there.

Suddenly, Fetail grabbed her friend’s hand. ‘’Haaaah. Somebody is coming. And she's a strong Magical Girl! What a pain!’’

Godofreda nodded and assumed a combat stance, prepared to defend her friend. But as it usually happened, their preparations were in vain.

Out of the darkness of the chapel stepped a young woman, but she paid them no heed: She was merely sweeping the graveyard path with a broom.

The girl was about 170cm tall, and had soft green hair styled into a ponytail which had its end dyed black. She had M-shaped bangs, like Imperator, but had long sideburns. Her eyes were a dark grey, and she wore round sunglasses. As for her outfit, she wore a black tophat with a pink band, and a black gravedigger’s uniform, including a grey cape, grey gloves, grey shoes and black trousers. For some reason, she had a green cat’s tails waving about in her lower back.

She lifted her head and looked at them, looking as if she had seen a ghost. She did a double take and quickly left her broom on the ground, bounding towards the pair.

They were on high alert: What would she do? Would she attack them? Their worries were in vain: The woman, which they nicknamed as Uno for the number on her outfit, stuck a hand into her top hat and produced two flower bouquets. Uno gave one bouquet to each girl while sporting a triumphant expression, as if she had done something great.

Godofreda carefully put the bouquets into her backpack and then took a step forward. "Hello! Can you understand us?" She waved at Uno, who gave a light nod in acknowledgement. It was then Fetail's turn to speak: "Haaaah. Can you speak, strange one?" Uno, who they guessed was a sort of gravedigger, gave another nod. She could speak, but she wouldn't…

Godofreda, who had relaxed significantly, approached Uno and was followed by Fetail. "So you can speak, but you won't. Are you allowed to speak?" Godofreda poked Uno around, who pointed a finger at herself and then crossed her arms to say I won't allow myself to speak… She pointed at the chapel's clock and then at her wrist. With that, she probably meant At least, not yet.

The gravedigger then led them to a simple, open grave they hadn't noticed before. The headstone read Until everything has been restored to its former glory I, Annie, shall tend to the Great Garden and shan't speak, unless it is necessary to restore everything to its former state.

"A heroic vow, eh? That's quite interesting, Annie! And what a cute name you have!" Godofreda had already warmed up to Annie. The gravedigger stuck her hand into her hat and produced another object: A plastic Halloween pumpkin filled with candy and sweets! Godofreda turned to look at Fetail. "Is it OK to eat it?"

Fetail and Annie both gave her a thumbs-up. So Godofreda popped a chocolate of chocolate into her mouth. Her face lit up: It was delicious! So she ate a few more before Fetail flicked the back of her friend's head. "Haaaaah. Goddy, you'll end up getting cavities at this rate. So stop that: Dentists are expensive, and you know how Olivia is when it comes to money."

Godofreda wiped her mouth with her sleeve. "Miss Annie, that was delicious! Thank you very much!" The gravedigger looked happy to be praised, so she gave Godofreda a quick pat on the head to thank her. Fetail looked at the clock and voiced a question: "Restoring all to its former glory… Restoring what?"

Annie pointed at the depressing landscape around them. ‘’There used to be something here, right? By the way, how are you planning on restoring everything back to its former self? It sounds tough!’’ She exclaimed that as Fetail looked at the graves. Annie simply shrugged: It seems that she didn’t know how to restore everything back to its former state.

Fetail then asked a vital question: ‘’How long have you been here? How many years?’’ To reply, Annie pointed at the chapel’s clock: Her finger landed on a 9, then a 6, and then a 9 again.

Godofreda looked incredulous, but an unimpressed Fetail patted her back. ‘’Magical Girls make no sense, it’s best to abandon logic and reason when dealing with them.’’

‘’I see…’’ Godofreda empathised with Annie’s plight, so she looked quite down.

Fetail tried to come up with something to cheer her up, but she was interrupted by a yawn from Annie, who had taken a blanket out of her hat and placed herself inside the open grave. " Pantocrator: Somnia," She whispered, and immediately fell asleep.

She had decided to take a nap and then revealed her Magic: Falling asleep anywhere and at any time! It sort of fit her, in a way. She considered napping necessary to reach her goal, and so she spoke.

That was when Fetail decided she’d had enough for the day: ‘’Let’s go home, Goddy… What about a bath when we get back?"

That cheered her up! "Awww yeah, it's a deal! Bye bye, Annie! We'll come back!" She waved goodbye at the sleeping girl as they exited the dimension. They then made their way to the living room after leaving the garage.

There, the pair found Hadrinyan and Imperator. They were sitting around the table behind the couch, playing a game of cards: It was exactly what they'd seen before leaving. Hadrinyan turned to wave at them. "Well, well, look at who's back? It's not like I care, but do tell me in detail about your trip, alright?!"

Imperator launched herself at Fetail. "Little Zoya, I missed you, gobi!" Godofreda pulled on the girl’s scorpion-like tail. "Hare-Hare, are you up for a bath? I sure am!"

"Sounds great, gobi! Let's go, gobi!"

"Haaaaaah… What a pain."

Godofreda and Imperator dragged Fetail across the corridor with broad grins on their faces, and they vanished after turning to the left and entering the bathroom. Thus, Hadrinyan was left alone: The lively three were in the bath, and Voytek was meditating in the cellar as a solution to her very particular problem, with Gladstone overseeing her.

Hadrinyan sat in silence, enjoying the moment of respite: No stalkers appearing out of her shadow, no catfights, no aliens running around, and no Magical Girls causing trouble. There was a faint ringing sound in her ears, probably caused by some bizarre Magical Disease, but it was faint enough to be ignored. "Olivia, is this what you long for, is this silence what you strive for? If so, I am proud of you: You are the best and most refined host one could wish for. Be glad I am being honest: Only you may see this, and nobody else!"

The cat-maid put her palm against the table and covered part of it in dust, which she then sculpted and hardened it until it looked like a cute little doll in Olivia's likeness. Hadrinyan then spent 10 minutes perfecting it and polishing it, until she was satisfied. "Hmph! Are you satisfied now, Riego? You better be, this gift wasn't easy to make! Be grateful and cry at my kindness, Olivia Del Riego Y Flórez!" A very flustered Hadrinyan vanished, and Olivia took her place. "Thank you, Hadrinyan. I will treasure this."

Carefully, she carried the doll to her room and placed it on the nightstand next to her bed, in her room. But before that, she stopped to listen to the lively voices of her friends in the bath, with Fetail’s slow and lazy voice standing out: She sounded like she wasn’t having a great time. She also heard a quiet song from the cellar, which was probably Voytek singing a folk song. Her friends were odd, but Hadrinyan was one of the strangest in their group: It was almost unheard of for Magical Girls to have Magical Girl Forms with their own wills, separate from their human form’s will. Usually, they were just powered-up versions of their original selves, with some appearance and personality changes. But Olivia didn’t dislike her at all: They were a great team, and she had all the skills to be the leader of the Carcabuey Protection Squadron.

‘’Most importantly, Hadrinyan is a justice-lover in her own way. She is also strong and goddamn cute. Just how a proper Magical Girl should be. She still has a lot to learn, though.’’ Olivia sat down on the bed and looked at the walls of the room: Before her comrades moved in, it was rather blank, having only a bookshelf with some history books and a bunch of alien-themed posters on the walls. But now, it was bright and colourful: The walls were lined with sketches and drawings made by her friends, photos of them together, and a significant amount of notes complaining about each other’s strange habits and poking fun at the dumb things they did at times. A few people from outside her household had chimed in, like a few villagers delivering thank you notes. Even Almudena and her gang had written a bunch of messages!

Her new life was a bit of a mess, but it was fun, very fun. With the unnatural end of hostilities and problems around her, she could finally stop to appreciate what she had built up until then. ‘’They’re all dear to me, they are. I swear on my name, on my heritage and on my status of a Magical Girl that I will protect everyone.’’ She took a piece of paper, some glue and a pencil from the nightstand’s drawer and proceeded to write Thank you, everyone: You are the best companions you could ask for! For you, I’ll bear with this cramped bed. And then she glued it to the wall, to the left to a sketch of Fetail suplexing Godofreda, and below a photo taken by Godofreda herself, which showed Hadrinyan, Voytek and Fetail throwing snowballs at the stalkers which plagued Olivia’s household, with Fetail giving everyone the middle finger in the background after being snowballed herself.

Oliva laughed a bit at the photo and nodded to herself. ‘’I am ready to give up my main dream if it means keeping these girls happy and safe. But they probably wouldn’t like that. What a nice bunch they are!’’

Olivia approached the shelf and drew two books from it: She was working on three books: The novel about aliens and Magical Girls, which was being posted online bit by bit. and reviewed by those interested. The other two were being handwritten: A manual on how to become a great Magical Girl, and an encyclopaedia on all Magical Girls, an arduous task. But she would see it through.

She sat down on the bed and smiled to herself as she heard the door of the bathroom opening and saw Voytek heading down the corridor, absentmindedly reading a book on chivalry. Olivia hopped over to her and stopped her from tripping.

‘’We thank you, dear rival. You have saved us from an embarrassing accident. Now we shall save you by telling you to watch your back!’’ But her warning came too late, as Godofreda leapt at Oliva and hugged her back. ‘’Oli, I missed you so much!’’

Oliva took the chance to pat Godofreda’s face and took a photo of it. ‘’This is going on our wall.’’ The eyepatch-wearing girl declared a look of bliss on her face as she patted her friend’s head.

‘’Oliiii, I am not a dog! But if it’s you, I don’t mind…’’

Fetail cracked her knuckles and joined in with the patting, being followed by everyone else present, including Gladstone.

‘’Like a dog, gobi! Just like a dog, gobi!’’ Imperator was having the time of her life ruffling her friend’s head.

‘’Haaaaah, Goddy. You’re making it far too easy for me to bully you. At least try… Oe Or don’t. What a pain.’’ Fetail was trying to get it done fast.

‘’How curious. We have never owned a dog. Is this how it feels?’’ Voytek was cautious and attempted to emulate her friends and her rival.

‘’Princess, I shall strive to adopt an artificial Magical Girl form one day to properly understand this world! I have been acting blind, but this has opened my eyes!’’ Gladstone said something weird, opening the door for future comedy and new laughs to be had.

Godofreda gave Olivia a hug, still unable to speak, which was then gladly joined by everyone else… Except for Fetail, who was forced to join in after Imperator gave her a noogie. She still looked very uncomfortable, though. "Haaaah, my rights are being trampled." That earned her a whip from Imperator's tail, to which she replied by attempting to force a mercury pill down her friend's throat. "Sic Semper Tyrannis." And a few flames sprouted from Fetail’s hair, her left leg turning into gooey jelly afterwards.

Fetail hopped aside and looked at the window, seeing three familiar faces taking photos of them from a ladder. Of course, she ignored them and kept quiet.

Everyone else would take a while to notice the three stooges from the Briareo household taking photos of them from the window, and Voytek would volunteer to kick their ladder down and send them back home, where they all belonged.

Before being kicked down, Regina told them all: ‘’There’s a festival going on at the village, you all better get over here and join us. Especially you, Prince Charming~’’

Fetail felt like even Godofreda, who she knew was aware the status quo was unnatural, was actually pleased with the current state of affairs. I'll have to do everything myself, or enlist help from outside forces. Haaaah, what a pain. Sic Semper Tyrannis! Those were her thoughts as she began her plan to save the world mostly by herself. Having pleasant days wasn't bad, but they couldn't go on forever, or else everyone would rust. Something had to happen. Then, she had a brilliant idea: She would ask Almudena for help! The one who lives in the shadows should know exactly what is occurring in them, she reasoned.

She could not tolerate how everyone was rusting. She would not accept them becoming hedonistic and content. Even though she was lazy and had an aversion towards work, she was not hedonistic:

She hated hedonism and contentment, as expected from the one who embodied the future: Her objective was not pleasure, she had higher goals! She wanted to finish her studies, she wanted to eventually move to Florence, and visit Tokyo again. She even wanted to finish writing her manifesto… And then there was her wish to become immortal. She said it was to slack off, but there was probably another reason behind it.

No matter what she wanted to accomplish with those goals, they were still goals, and she wanted to accomplish things, not to drift around idly.

Yes, as much as she appreciated the finer points of slowing down every once in a while, she could not condone stopping fully, and she could not stand everyone doing it. Yes, she complained many times about all sorts of things and about what a pain they were, but she knew that there were things that had to be done no matter what, and she would never let herself rust. She knew pain and suffering were an integral part of life too , and they could not be denied. Well, she would deny herself death, but that was about it.

What a paradox it all was!

Good grief, these people are forcing me to act. Oh well, I can't run away from this one. Time to get my hands dirty. Haaaah. Thus began Fetail's plan. Thus began her plan to obtain what others had failed at. First, she would have to get things rolling once again.

Watch me, Qin Shi Huang. Watch me, Gilgamesh: I will achieve what you two failed at.

                                                                            ☆☆☆