Merits Are Important

There was a problem, one blaring obstacle——one I would have never perceived.

A quarter and a half has passed, and I felt like I wasn’t making any progress. My class has yet to unite, and I’ve fine-tuned the small details that I thought would work. There seemed to be an oppossing force; I should determine what was what.

Problems stacked upon another——a pattern that seemed to occur seldomly in this academy. I had no time for those other problems, but I cannot progress without solving them.

Time was running out; trust was diminishing.

Over there was Miyazono; over there was Morisaki; over there was Ito and Ryuu, and over there was the acquainted ‘conservative’ group. It was too divided, but there was one little change that mattered.

“Alright, class, turn to page—”

Most of the class paid respects to our dear teacher——that was that.

“Hey,” Ito silently hollered at me, “can you help me with this later?”

“Takuya, you do know I can hear you,” stated Teacher Jitan.

Some weakly laughed; most didn’t react——maybe some smirked, but there remained the stiff atmosphere.

Distrust remained, and the remaining trust dwindled.

In a rare instance, Miyazono came over to me when lunch break started.

“We have to talk.”

No one is omnipotent. Even I have some things I didn’t know, didn’t notice, didn’t realize. It was too late for me when I knew gossips were swirling around; people glanced at me and whispered to one another as if I did something wrong.

This was making me self-conscious——more self-conscious than before.

What did I do wrong? Where have I gone wrong—no, did I do something wrong? Was there something I did in distaste? Or…

“Yajima…”

Did they…

“Yajima?”

…find out?

“Yajima!”

“I hear you, Miyazono.”

“That was rather cold.”

Cold? Replaying the few seconds, I might have slipped up in the moment.

“Sorry, I mean…” My thoughts leaked out? “Yes, I hear you.”

“You were spacing out suddenly; don’t give me that crap.”

“I seriously did hear you though.”

“Enough of that,” she twirled backward to take a seat nearby. My initiative thought she wanted to drag the seat in front of my table, so, I grabbed a seat and placed it in front. “What are you doing?”

But, I was wrong.

She just sat there, with space between us. She was still wary of me. That broke my heart.

“Yajima, have you heard what’s going around?”

“There are many things that goes around; which one?”

“I surmise you know nothing about this.”

There was no need for this dramatic reveal. I started to shuffle things in my bag in search of something. “Lunchtime is short; Ryuu is waiting.”

Miyazono sighed. “Could you stop with the act for just a second?”

Her cold words froze my movements.

“Excuse me?” I started to move again.

“Kazuya Takeuchi.”

And she froze me again.

I bowed to the ground in respect, “It’s a shame what has happened to him.”

“Yeah, suicide and all that,” she blurted out in such a casual tone.

“Hey now, you should respect him—”

“He didn’t kill himself, did he?”

I looked into her eyes——her eyes unflinching in resolve. It seemed like she was trying to pierce into my soul, again. This was her employed tactic she repeatedly used without fail, until recently, when I could handle pretty eyes staring at me.

“I’d rather not delve into this topic,” I pulled out my plastic lunchbox. “Death shouldn’t hinder appetite.” I excused myself from my seat, briskly walking to the elevators.

I wasn’t trying to escape the threat of discovery. I simply didn’t want to hear another word from her, because—

“Kana Chinatsu, Class Iridium.”

—she had a piece of my mind.

I’ve just reached the elevator; my hands barely touching the button.

“Of CHINA-Made, one of the most powerful companies in Japan, harshly competing globally. Her company is only hindered by the all-powerful Ginto Inc., but her true obstacle is you—were you. I only have to spare you the details, because you know her, don’t you?”

I looked back, gripping my only item in hand tightly. “I suppose you’ll do something with this information.”

She took a step toward me. Her shoes clicked and tapped; she wore short high-heels, complimenting her semi-formal dress. We were lucky airconditioning was a convenience, not a luxury, for it was a necessity, lest she sweats in the humid-looking outfit.

Yet, she didn’t accelerate her strides. Miyazono stylishly walked assertively, as if she won over something, perhaps more accurately, someone.

As she closed the distance, she pucked her lips and then made a little smile, captivating my eyes towards it.

It was the right amount of gloss, neither too thick nor thin. It suited her aloof demeanor. Her lips opened.

“Don’t worry, unlike you, I won’t be blackmailing.”

A strong accusation that was false.

“There was only one reason she met you on that day.”

I kept calm, questioning her words. What day?

“That day before he died.”

There was no relationship between his death and our meeting.

“And it was made clear to me.”

What were you trying to “Say?”

I startled her with my sudden single-word outburst. She observed me and smiled, “Feeling a bit tense, aren’t you?”

I diagnosed myself: My breathing was ragged, my hands were trembling a little and were a bit sweaty, my eyes couldn’t focus on one area, my foot was tempted to tap the floor in impatience, and my throat was dry.

I wasn’t calm; there was something wrong with me.

Instantly, I realized the reason. This was how it felt post-murder.

Next, she’ll say,

“You like her.” ’You killed him.’

My mind became blank. My brain was confused. My heart also stopped in consideration. Too much blood in your brain makes you dizzy. I needed the blood more on my face because I was sure my face was pale.

But, all my activity stopped: My breathing ceased, my hands froze, my eyes focused, and my feet firmly planted.

After what seemed like a minute, I cleared my throat, “No, I didn’t—don’t.”

Her eyes wavered in confusion. “Weird.”

No, she was the weird one. I expected her to mock me for that slip-up. Like, she’ll tease, ‘Be honest, you like her, don’t you?’

Then, Miyazono went past me and pushed the button. She didn’t speak or look back at me again until the elevator opened.

I wanted to ask her why she mentioned Chinatsu since she didn’t bring her up again, but we only stared at each other (probably, she was glaring at me) before the doors closed between us.

It was better this way; I’d rather let the topic flow out of the river.

At the usual table where I and Ryuu’s group ate lunch, Ito triggered an interesting topic.

“Yajima, you’re such a lucky man!” he exclaimed, causing me to repulse away from him.

“Yeah, Yajima, why’d you keep this a secret from us?”

I had no idea what they were talking about. I was brought out of the loop only to be shoved into it again.

“I suppose I am a lucky man, but I haven’t kept a secret from you.” Aside from the fact that… I quickly took a spoonful of my lunch.

“Oh my gosh, don’t piss me off!” Ito flipped out and started to shake me vigorously. “How could you abandon your virgin brothers!”

I tried so hard to not spit the food out on his face. I couldn’t beg him to stop his body-quake to prevent such an incident. I wasn’t a lucky man after all.

Thankfully, he stopped his jeopardizing actions, and I safely gulped my food.

“What’s between you and Chinatsu?” asked Ryuu amongst the raising voices of envious elation.

“Between us?” I asked confused. Having no grasp of the conversation, I took things literally. I scanned and found Chinatsu at another table with her numerous friends, then I estimated the distance between my table and hers. “About ten meters, fifteen at most.”

“Your sarcasm is about to annoy me, Amahiko.”

“I’m sorry, I wasn’t trying to be sarcastic.” I seriously didn’t know what they were talking about.

“Could you stop hiding it? We know Chinatsu likes you!” Ito said.

“I’m glad she does; wouldn’t it be bad if she didn’t?”

Then, the entire table unanimously sighed.

“There’s no way you’re this dense!”

“No, are you just dumb?”

“If you’re just acting to be pure, please stop.”

“Harem protagonists are the most annoying!”

They started whining, grumbling, complaining, and lightly mocking me. I should admit I was getting a bit guilty.

“I—I’m sorry guys. I don’t understand the topic. Could someone please explain it to me?”

Ito grabbed me close, our foreheads pressing. “I must drill this into your brain right now. Chinatsu, likes, you. Do you hear?”

I slightly nodded, restricted by the space.

“You still don’t get it. Chinatsu, likes, you. Do you get it?”

“Y—yes, I get it,” affirming, albeit still confused.

Closing his eyes, he deeply sighed, and whispered, “So, it’s true that people who are good at academics are dumb in the test of love.”

“Excuse me?”

“No, nothing.”

I heard you, you know.

“You’d better understand this. If you don’t, I’m slapping you to the ends of the earth!”

He seemed genuinely irritated now. I must say I feared what he will do. I’ve never seen him this agitated before.

“Chinatsu, loves—loves! You!”

“A—ah, I get it…”

We stared at each other, blinking our eyes.

There was a swirl if I could describe it, like a rainbow of thoughts and emotions mixing into a sweet and warm feeling. My logical side of my mind threw me into a panic realizing the meaning of those words.

Ito released and backed away, observing my reactions.

But, I suppressed my surprise, but my warming face gave it away.

Ito began laughing loudly, “We got him!!” The group joined him.

Sometimes, I wished I was a child——this was one of those times.

A child takes anything at face value with the most innocent meaning. Undefiled and pure thoughts and emotions emanated an angelic glow. If anyone told a child they love them, they’ll think of parental love.

Naturally, as I grew up, I knew these things. They were unavoidable. Even if you were placed in isolation, you’ll find yourself desiring this unknown feeling. Some call it a fleeting emotion; they were mistaken.

Love is a strong desire.

And I wasn’t ready for it.