The Shock

Victor knew that if I wrote him such a message, I was not kidding and I really needed his presence. He came back after a while, I managed to cry a little, but when I saw him, I started to cry again. He asked what happened, and I didn't have the strength to hide anything anymore, I wanted to tell someone about what happened to Hyacinth, that my safe love bubble burst because of Ginny and her stupid experiments.

"I'll talk to him and then he'll kill him," he said firmly as he listened to me, though he was already burning with enormous anger as I told him.

"No," I said sadly. "Hyacinth is not to blame for anything, it all started with me, and let it end with me. I have always been aware that because of the power I have no chance of a happy relationship. We need some time, we'll talk it over some time and it'll be like it used to be, right?"

"Yes, Lulu. Everything's gonna be okay," my brother tried to comfort me, and he held out his arms to hug me.

But I felt that he didn't really believe it himself, but at least he had good intentions to cheer me up somehow. I also needed some assurance to believe my own words. Somehow I got through another day, although I saw that Flora wanted to talk to me and find out why my eyes were so swollen. She knew too well what it looked like after a weeping night. I put it off, it was too heavy for me to confide in Victor earlier, I wouldn't be able to do it again, even on a smaller scale.

After work, I went to my parent's grave. On the way to the flower shop, where a bouquet was waiting for me. This shop had been run for years by the same woman who remembered me during my first visit years ago. Initially with David, then I came here alone, she always knew when to expect me. The florist smiled warmly as she handed me the flowers.

"I'll be retiring soon, child," she said to me. "But I will pass on to my successors so that every year such a bouquet awaits for you."

"Thank you," I whispered. "It means a lot to me," I said honestly.

Before walking through the cemetery gate, I removed my lenses and put on my glasses. Dad didn't like it when I hid my true eye color, he only tolerated it when other people were around. Now I was all alone, I didn't have to be afraid of hurting someone. When I completed the path I knew so well, I lit candles, put flowers on the grave, and sat down on the ground for a while.

"Hi, Mom and Dad," I said softly. "Nice to see you. For me, everything has fallen a bit, but I don't want to worry you about that. I talked to Victor, it helped me a little. I guess I'm doing pretty well at work. The kids are nice and fun, you just have to let them be themselves. Martha and David are fine too, I'm going to see them tomorrow. They always organize a dinner for my birthday. I just don't know what will happen next… Please just keep your fingers crossed for me and don't be too disappointed with my mistakes." I laughed softly. "You would probably have some wise advice for me, I wish I could hear it."

I informed my parents about what was happening and said goodbye. This visit did not bring me the relief that I had hoped for, but I was glad that I came. It was always nice to visit them, even if it just meant talking to the stone slab for a while. I got up, and as I was getting up from the ground, my glasses slightly slipped off my nose, and it was only then that I noticed that someone was staring at me. I quickly corrected them, fortunately, I didn't feel that my power was affecting this woman. She must have heard me talking to herself because her expression showed surprise, I was a bit embarrassed and tried not to accelerate my pace hard as I headed towards the car. I felt very uncomfortable and it terrified me that I didn't know the reason behind it.

The next day, when Hyacinth didn't show up for my birthday dinner arranged by my parents, I wasn't surprised at all. I wasn't ready for a confrontation myself, at least not so soon. He found an excuse, but Martha guessed how much she was made up of, so Victor and I had a hard time lest she accidentally pulls something out of us.

Between the main course and dessert, I went out to the garden for a while to breathe some fresh air. I still felt the weight of the birthday on my shoulders and the emotions that accompanied it just overwhelmed me. I was also afraid that I had a chance to control all the chaos that was going on in my head and heart. On the one hand, I felt terrible about the fact that my potential relationship with my brother would not stand a chance, and on the other hand, there was a spark of happiness in me that Hyacinth felt something for me. When I remembered his words, I felt like jumping for joy, and the memory of his lips on my neck made me shudder.

I sighed heavily and leaned my elbows on the railing. I hadn't even noticed when Meow appeared next to me. He was watching me curiously, but with his usual sense of superiority.

"I suppose you appreciate very much that I personally wished you a birthday," he thought, acting as if he knew I would understand.

"Of course," I replied a bit with momentum.

"You deserve it, maid, you take my authority seriously," he added. "But next time you have to bring some more of my favorite treats. That's all I wanted to tell you," he announced emphatically and jumped down onto the terrace.

I don't know why, but this short exchange of words with our ginger cat made me laugh a lot. When as children, Victor and I tried to see if with my power I could read the thoughts of animals, none of our assumptions worked. However, as I got older, when my power developed a bit, I sometimes managed to do it, but it was an occasional achievement. It seemed to me that this was related to whether a particular animal necessarily wanted to communicate with me or conveyed something to me. I didn't investigate this phenomenon, I didn't really need it, but I decided to remember Meow's request and not fall out of the circle of his favorite servants.

The days grew shorter and colder, winter slowly came, and the situation between my brother and me did not improve. We still avoided each other, if it was necessary to get along with something, Hyacinth would contact Victor. Though the younger brother had a hard time not being nervous at these times, I asked him to treat him no differently because of me. I didn't want to be to blame for the breakdown of their relationship, especially since they were biological siblings.

Victor tried to show his feelings for Alex as little as possible, but I asked him not to worry about it. I liked his beloved, although not officially his boyfriend yet, and I was very happy when he visited us. I felt very comfortable in the presence of this student and I enjoyed hearing about the plans and engineering projects that he was going to implement. Many of them were related to ecology, the more pleasant it was for the ear. Honestly, their happiness only kept me from despairing over my own feelings.

Now the thought of Hyacinth made me feel irritated and a bit angry about the whole situation. The rage was caused by the changes that had occurred since my birthday and the uncertainty about what would happen next. I was annoyed with the "what if" thoughts every day, and even though I didn't want to consider them, they kept coming back, and I couldn't resist the temptation not to imagine my own happy ending with Hyacinth.

I felt a little better around Christmas because I was busy looking for presents and preparing baked goods. This year, the whole family was going to come to our family home, including the grandparents on both sides, two of Martha's brothers and David's older sister, and their families. I wondered what it was caused by, but on the other hand, I was glad to be able to bake a lot of sweets. I was pleased with the gifts that I managed to get for my family members, but I didn't think that all the joy of preparation would disappear in the blink of an eye, even before we shared a meal.

I was nervous about meeting everyone, especially Hyacinth and Ginny, I was able to learn so much from David that she would also honor us with her presence. I haven't seen my aunt and cousins ​​for a long time and they were usually neutral towards me. At first, they treated me like a stranger, but over time they started to see me as a family member with whom they just keep in touch on principle and meet at family celebrations.

My older brother and his girlfriend asked me to talk privately for a while. Once we were sure the rest of the family couldn't hear us, Ginny was watching me closely. I read her thoughts and felt my heart tighten in my chest and my eyes widened in surprise. I clenched my fists, I was going to have to pretend big surprise in a moment. I looked at my brother, who couldn't meet my eyes, he didn't know what to expect. He was worried about my reaction and whether his version of events would coincide with mine. All I knew was that I would help him, whether it was true or not. I wouldn't let him lose face, even if it hurt me.

"Listen, Lucretia," Ginny said, unable to take the tension anymore. "Hyacinth proposed to me and we want to pass it on to the family today."

"I'm honored to find out about this first," I said, smiling. I was hoping it at least looked almost sincere. "Congratulations. Can I see the ring?"

"I'm not finished," said Hyacinth's, now fiancée, furious. "Before that, however, I must be sure that there is nothing between you."

"And what would be?" I asked.

"Don't pretend you don't know what's going on." She approached me and made a scowl.

"Ginny, I didn't think you were so jealous after I met you," I laughed. "We are just very close with Hyacinth. Our parents worked a lot, so he took care of me and Victor a lot. You can't blame me for loving my own brother."

"Just like a brother?"

"Of course, I feel offended that you can even think about anything else," I was indignant. "I'm glad you are getting along, but I don't like the whole conversation," I said, wanting to end the topic emphatically. It was getting harder and harder for me to hold back tears. "Next time, let go of your stupid speculations and focus on love for my brother because he's the best guy you could ever find."

I turned around, but before I did, I looked at Hyacinth, his clenched lips and fists showing anger. I could see that he was nervous that I accepted it without much emotion. He wanted me to react somehow, to fight for him and not just accept the situation. He loved Ginny, and the engagement was a bit forced by her, but he wasn't quite sure if he had an unlimited affection for her. On the way, I looked at Meow, who was clearly listening to our conversation.

"I'm disappointed," commented the cat. "I was hoping for an interesting scene."

Of course, the whole family was happy to hear the news. Victor hardly choked on his food when he heard about it. He looked at me and my sad smile. I stepped back into the shadows, trying to hide my true emotions. I didn't want Hyacinth to doubt Ginny, I really wanted the best for him. And for perhaps the first time he felt uncomfortable being the center of attention, and Ginny immediately revived as everyone admired her beautiful diamond ring, which she had chosen for herself, but she would not admit it. Late in the evening, I was tired of pretending, I asked Victor to come back, and I explained that I felt bad and tired from baking.

For the following days, I felt lethargic. Hour after hour passed and I was unable to recover. In my head, I was still replaying our conversation and the word "engagement" sounded like a sentence to me and another nasty joke of fate, but what else could I expect? Hyacinth had the right to make a life with someone normal, and he would eventually forget about me. It's going to go over your bones, and in the end, I could always make him forget a few things. I laughed sadly, too bad no one could have done that for me either.

The kids had a break, so I spent the winter break under the blanket, watching TV and crying every now and then. However, one day I had to leave, Victor had a hard time asking for it, but he wanted to spend some time alone with Alex, not necessarily locking themselves in his room. I understood and I didn't hold it against him. I decided to go for a very long walk in the park. On the way, I stopped for a coffee at our favorite coffee shop and sipped it slowly, enjoying its warmth. In the park, I saw the children enjoying the winter, sledding, making snowmen, and throwing snowballs. I heard their joyful laughter and I wished I could catch it somehow. It triggered some memories.

"Come on Lulu, it's winter after all!" Victor was tugging on the sleeve of my jacket to make me play with the other children.

I didn't feel like it. I didn't like winter very much and I didn't fully trust the kids from school yet. I still felt insecure around them. My brother, however, was bursting with energy, he was looking forward to playing with his peers, at least then he did not have to worry about communication problems. I had a bad feeling and that's why I didn't get caught up in the fun, just watched the surroundings. A few boys from a parallel class with whom Victor got into some conflict caught my attention. I saw them try to compact the snowballs to keep them as hard as possible. I didn't like the plan forming in their heads. They smiled maliciously and tried to throw. I lunged toward my brother and pushed him, risking myself for the attack. Hitting the head of a snowball was quite painful.

I did not think that I would receive the same blow from an unknown side ever again, and a second later I was pinned to the ground by the weight of one quadruped. I also heard a quickly approaching male nervous voice calling for a pet. The dog was looking at me curiously and was not going to move.

"You want to be my new lady?" the delighted animal asked.