Dirty Jokes

I have settled things with one of the people I cut off. I made a very bad and dirty joke to him which made him uncomfortable and him blaming it on me made me angry. I told him that if he doesn't like my jokes then don't come to me and thus I cut him off.

One of my female friends convinced me that I was the one in the wrong and I should apologize to him. Her convincing made me realize how much of a bitch I was to him. I blamed him for not liking my dirty joke. I blamed for being sensitive about my joke. But in reality, it was me who was in the wrong. I shouldn't have said such dirty jokes to him or anyone for that matter. I cut him off for my own comfort. I blamed him so I can feel good about myself. At the end, I apologized. I have fixed things with him and he is no longer treated as a shackle to me.

During these teenage years, people starts to say a lot of dirty jokes and the people starts revealing their dirty side. As we become a teenager, we get dirty minded after knowing things about sex and other dirty stuff. We gain more knowledge about everything related to these as we grow up. The thing about these dirty jokes is that it's okay to say it to people who understands it but there should always be a limit kept to the amount of dirty jokes said. And that was my mistake with that friend. There should be a line drawn to the dirty jokes you say to a person and I crossed the line with the joke and made him uncomfortable and that was my mistake. I was the one in the wrong here. I shouldn't have blamed him. I have started to talk to him and recover from my mistakes.

As for the other person I cut off, I want to apologize to him. I did him wrong by telling him to kill himself and not exist. I was harsh to him. I shouldn't have said anything like that. I should have cut him off by mentioning the problem properly. I still regret being that harsh to him and whenever I see him, it reminds me of how much of a bitch I am to him. What I mean is that I want to cut him off, but shouldn't have done it in a harsh way. Even though I wish to apologize to him, the fact that I cut him off always comes in mind so I ignore him every time, cutting off all communication with him. The reason I cut him off is because he was annoying to me but that doesn't give me any right to tell him to kill himself but at the heat of the moment, it just happened. I don't feel like apologizing now, but I will do it soon.

For now, I don't feel suicidal and I feel much better now. My heart doesn't feel heavy now. I have some hope for the school tour and I decided that I'm going. I don't know if it would be boring but I will never know that unless I go.