Join the Committee

My gloomy daydreaming was suddenly interrupted by an unfamiliar voice and I almost dropped my camera. “Hey! You're Simon right?” A sweet and surprisingly high-pitched voice rang in my ears.

When I looked up to see who had addressed me, my gaze was met by a pair of curious, bright blue eyes. "Y-yes, that's me," I stuttered, "who are you?" I did not need to wait for her answer before it dawned on me who I was talking to and a bitter jealousy rose up from my stomach to my chest, burning its way through my heart in the process.

“My name’s Isabelle! I don’t think we’ve met before," she smiled kindly, "but you might know me from the yearbook committee.” A couple of white snowdrops had fallen into her dark hair and she was surprisingly short; Even if she would stand on her tiptoes, she would probably not reach above my shoulders.

I sifted through my recent memories in an attempt to unearth any information on Isabelle. “Yeah, I think I remember you," I cautiously answered, "didn’t you take the photographs last year?”

She nodded excitedly and rubbed her hands together to fight off the cold before putting them back into the deep pockets of her coat. “Yes, I did actually! I do enjoy photography but I'm no professional. You on the other hand..." She smiled playfully.

"What, me?!" I froze in place for a moment and shyly clung to my camera. "I've got a good camera but that does not automatically make me a good photographer!"

"Of course you are! Joey showed me some of the pictures you took in the museum yesterday. They're wonderful," she complimented me warmly as we continued walking. Her response only made me more anxious. What else had Joey said about me? When they had been laughing earlier, had they been laughing at me? My tense shoulders slumped in relief when she added with a chuckle: "He couldn't shut up about how pretty your pictures are." Maybe I was overthinking things again.

“In any case, your pictures can’t be much worse than the ones I took for the yearbook last year,” Isabelle continued with a shrug. “I had to retake -like- half of them because they were blurry or the lighting was off. Looking back, it's kind of funny how bad the pictures turned out and everyone got over it eventually, but when everyone first received the yearbook it was a nightmare! It wasn't fun to be chewed out by my classmates over something I'd worked so hard on."

She suddenly put a hand in front of her mouth and her eyes widened. "Oh sorry, am I talking too much? Unfortunately, I'm a bit of an oversharer." She smiled joyfully. "Just tell me to stop if you can't get a word in. It's something I need to work on."

“Oh no, you're fine, I'm actually more of a listener anyway..." In comparison to Isabelle's prominent presence, my voice was barely audible. However, I did not find her dominance in the conversation to be obtrusive or overbearing at all. Yes, Isabelle may be an oversharer, but her kindness and positive attitude far outweighed this quality. Maybe that was precisely the problem, it would have been so much easier to disapprove of her and Joey if she had been a mean person.

Isabelle did not look entirely convinced but continued regardless. "Um, anyway, that is why I wanted to talk to you in the first place. Because of last year's disaster, I’m only doing the layout and editing for the yearbook this year and we need a new photographer. Would you like to join our committee? Judging from your museum pictures, I bet you're much better with a camera than the other members -although that is not a high bar to jump- so we would love to have you on our team! So what do you say?"

Isabelle's offer took me by surprise. I had never formally been asked to join any kind of school club or committee. To be honest, I always just assumed most people at school ignored me or -at best- were simply unaware of my existence in the first place. I needed a moment to weigh my options, to untangle my mind.

"Can I think about it?” I hesitantly answered. I naturally felt inclined to turn down Isabelle's offer; not only would any committee activity take time away from my ballet practice, but it would also be quite awkward to be stuck with Isabelle when she and Joey would inevitably start dating. The promise of being part of something bigger with the added possibility of making new friends, on the other hand, was very appealing.

“Of course!” Isabelle winked. “Let me know when you’ve made a decision!” She waved at me one last time before sprinting back to Joey who was happy to see her again.

I threw my head back and took a deep breath, focussing on the chill that travelled through my lungs. I tried to focus on the cheerful chirping of the blackbirds and the robins and the tits in the trees, but their songs were overshadowed by the chatter of my classmates. Their conversations slipped into my brain and drowned out my own thoughts. I needed some time to think, some time alone. As I let my gaze drift to the beautiful snow-covered pines on the side of the road and the trees hidden behind those pines, I made a decision. I would need to sneak away from the group.