If only I could be strong, and say the words I feel.

There goes the chief again…

I swear to God, she’s going to walk straight into a building face-first any day now.

I am firmly convinced that the only reason Management puts up with her, and all our team for that matter, is because of the amazing performance she manages to get out of Models Two and Three. In any other circumstance I can’t imagine they’d keep someone with the memory and temperament of a slightly more mature seven-year-old. Though I guess for her that’s just a happy accident, a secondary goal that only matters in the absence of any real progress in her real objective.

Reaching Aris.

It’s not like I don’t get it, I really do. Aris was my sister, after all, and I’ve known Joanne for about as long as she’s known Aris.

I would love nothing more than for her to come back to life like nothing happened, but even in the event that Joanne could bring her consciousness back afloat—even then, I’m certain her psyche would remain irreparably broken.

Though at this rate, I doubt she’d be able to tell the difference. She’s completely isolated herself inside that thick shell, and no stimulus can get to her.

She doesn’t even seem to have paid any mind to the complete revamp our labs have gotten just a few months back—kind of annoying considering she’s the one who kept me going back and forth with Management to get it approved. And it’s quite a nice revamp I ended up getting her.

Six hundred squared meters in total between Labs One and Two, a zero-gravity testing chamber for Number Three, a new computer mainframe that looks extravagant and science-fiction-y even to us, a new automatic RT-8 parts repairing and printing workbench to replace our old, outdated and broken one—we went from fourth-grade equipment and a novice team to slightly above average within the company in an instant. Everyone’s salary got doubled.

And while it’s true I was the one pushing for it to get approved, all of this was mostly thanks to the Chief herself and her outstanding work—and yet, she hasn’t cared about any of it. She hasn’t bothered to update the software we use to make use of any of the new mainframe’s features. She’s left zero-gravity testing to someone else and hasn’t even touched the RT-8.

…

It sure does feel like Joanne herself is just one more of the millions of souls left behind in the ruins of Kilia. Which would make my quest to bring her back as futile as hers with Aris.

***

“So, Chief? “What do you think?”

“Huh? I’m sorry, about what?”

“… Have you been listening at all for the past twenty minutes?”

“Ah, yeah, sure… Just do whatever Management asks for, I can’t afford to get us any more trouble for refusing direct orders.”

“Joanne. Are you REALLY sure that’s what you want?”

“As long as they don’t take Aris from me, I’ll be fine.”

“This isn’t about Number Two. This is about you, Chief. Aris is long dead, hanging onto her memory won’t do you any good—”

“People who don’t have a fucking clue of what they’re talking about shouldn’t be allowed the right to speak.”

Felix looks visibly annoyed at my comment. I am only speaking my mind, since he loves to tell me I should do that more often.

“… Okay, fine. I’m not going to bother talking to someone who has clearly decided not to listen to anyone but herself. But if you want the Polaris project to get cancelled or moved to another division and for her to be taken from you forever, this is a great and foolproof way to achieve that.”

And so he says, violently standing up and walking away. I do appreciate that he restrained himself enough not to shout all the way through his angry tantrum, but it would have been a lot nicer if he hadn’t dropped the act right at the end. The sound of that chair’s legs screeching against the ground still hurts my ears.

…

I appreciate his concern, I really do. I just want him to know that some things are better left to more experienced and knowledgeable people to handle. And besides. I can’t stand when people take me for an idiot to my face.

It’s true that Felix has known me for a long time, but that’s exactly why he should know better—he was there throughout those painful weeks, he should still remember what our final conclusions were at that time.

Aris’s conscience is still alive.

Two years is nothing for this kind of research with such a small team, he should also know that. We’re not kids anymore.

The completion of a functioning XTX9500 unit would be huge for Helix Industries as a whole, so it’s not like they can cancel the project on us. Especially not after we annihilated their latest combat android prototype in virtual testing. If anything, this has only improved Management’s opinion of us, and our budget seems bound to rise again shortly.

As long as all of that goes smoothly, I’ve been given a green light to work on bringing Aris back to our world.

…

As if to keep me from delving too deep into my memories, my PDA vibrates once again.

Manager Johnson requests that R&D Dept. 1 Chief of Section Joanne Armand and 1st Assistant Felix Wilson make themselves present in his office at 11:40AM. If possible, please bring the latest available documents and status reports for Units XTX9500-2 and XTX9500-3 with you.

I better get going then.

***

She’s here just in time. And by the looks of it, not especially concerned with what happened just a few minutes ago. Well, fine, she can have it her way for all I care. In fact, the whole reason we were called here is because I messaged management saying we’d go along with their stupid plan with no objections.

Without even glancing at each other, we enter the majestic Helix Industries central building.

It’s so unnecessarily big and flamboyant that the bill for its construction almost made the one for the whole planet the company purchased to host some of its operations look reasonable by comparison. Who would ever need 320 floors?! I don’t care how many departments and offices and storage floors it has; nothing can convince me it was a good investment.

… Perhaps we shouldn’t be leaving the decisions related to our budgets and salaries up to the same people who approved that. Just a thought.

Upon arriving at Johnson’s office, we’re met by the familiar face of one of the less insensitive businessmen within this building, the one directly in charge of our division and a few others. He has us sit down and quickly gets to the point—I appreciate the fact that he realizes we enjoy these meetings as much as he does.

“We have received news of the test battle between the Polaris unit and the new B-350 android conducted in virtual space. We have called you here to congratulate you on your progress with the project.”

Joanne is the one replying to him. Honestly, I’m just tagging along—all the responsibility for the project falls on her shoulders, I’m just an assistant who barely knows why he’s here.

“Thank you, sir. I’ve strived to do my best to keep up with the board’s expectations.”

“Up until now you’ve surpassed them. And for that reason, we have decided that we will grant you a special limited license to allow you to enact the Life Preservation Law in approved subjects by Helix Industries. This list does only include, for now, former research assistant Aris Wilson—but the number of candidates will be expanded as we consider appropriate.”

The Life Preservation Law…

But why now? Just this morning, the news was making a fuss about the fact it is very possibly being abolished soon. Why spend all the money and time for certifications then?

“In what capacity is my team allowed to enact said law, sir?”

“Not your team. Just you two, Joanne Armand and Felix Wilson. You are both allowed to perform any research that could be conceivably covered within that law, though we advise that you consult with our legal team before doing anything that might be considered an edge case.”

“I… That’s—Thank you, sir.”

“…”

“No need. Miss Armand, your research is very important to us, and we trust that you’re best capacitated to obtain the best results possible. We’ll analyze these documents you’ve brought us, and send you our next targets for the next twelve months. You’re free to go.”

“Yes, sir, thank you again.”

As expected, she unceremoniously shakes his hand, turns around and leaves—and since I have no reason to stay behind, I follow her. The less time I have to stay in close proximity to Management’s needlessly pompous offices, the better.

“Hey, Felix.”

“Yes? Do you need something?”

“No, not really… I just wanted to make sure you actually agreed to work on bringing Aris back.”

“I don’t think I ever said I agreed. In fact, I’m almost certain I gave you my thoughts about Aris just a few minutes ago.”

Her mood, which had been noticeably more upbeat than usual—it’s not often she’s the one starting conversations with anybody else unless strictly necessary—quickly drops again. I’m sorry, Joanne, I really am, but I don’t want to desecrate my sister’s lifeless remains any longer. Just let her rest in peace…

“And even if I agreed, how would you even go about bringing her back anyway? It’s not like legality has been the limiting factor so far, you haven’t even managed to find a trace of her personality or memories within Number Two.”

Just for the sake of argument—

“I don’t know, Felix. Perhaps… perhaps it’s my fault she hasn’t surfaced yet.”

“What do you mean? I know for a fact there’s never a single thing on your head apart from her. You don’t listen to anybody else, you don’t care about anything else, you only have eyes for her, as if—as if you’re still stuck in that day two years ago. If you say you haven’t actually tried at all in all this time, have you just been a walking corpse for two years?! How in hell can you POSSIBLY think you’re doing her a favor like this?!”

“It’s because I’m a coward. I’m a weakling, I’m scared of talking to her properly, I’m terrified of doing anything that could prove that she’s really not there… If only I could be strong, and say the words I feel… If only I could be brave and face that possibility I don’t want to imagine, maybe she’d be here already.”

“…”

“I’m sorry, Felix. You’ve stuck with me all this time, but it’s exactly as you say, I didn’t give a damn about anybody else—I’d be lying if I said that’s changed. And you know exactly why it is, you don’t need me to explain it to you, and I am sorry I neglected you too. I’m sorry I’ve been so ungrateful to you. But please…”

“You’re completely gone now, girl. You talk like you just drank one too many beers.”

“I hate being treated as an idiot, Felix.”

“And I hate lying to you and pretending you’re not acting like one, Joanne.”

“Then I guess this conversation is over.”

“Sure. One last thing, though.”

“What is it?”

“You won’t talk to Number Two properly, so don’t bother pretending you’re working on it. I guess I’ll just do it myself.”

…

She’s facing the other way, I can’t make out her expression. She doesn’t walk away though. Perhaps now she can see just a bit of how thick she’s built her bubble.

“Thank you, Felix.”

It seems we have a deal.