Halfway There is Good Enough For Now!

A short time ago, in a sport’s gymnasium not far far away, a girl was pushed towards making a decision for herself at the detriment of all those around her. It was made selfishly, but it was made rationally.

The enactment of that rationale has taken the form of a particular trauma for her.

Any thought spared towards that decision brings up images of disappointed faces, the pleading of adults and fellow students alike, all of which served to instill a unique type of loathing now.

Charl knows nothing about the story of this girl, her lived experience is as distant as a galaxy far far away, her story no more relatable to him than a rolling series of text sliding down an opening scene on a movie screen. 

Even if he had knowledge of it, he would still find himself overwhelmed by his own particular trauma. These encroaching bugs are a very real threat to him in a different way than the volleyball is to her, yet both of these things send a chill to their core. In this state, their rattled brains have yet to realize they could end it with a simple press of a button on the VR helmet.

This reaction to these two triggers is just what Akihiro Tani was hoping for.

The two will move within the scope of their traumas, dictated by the moment they have found themselves in.

Charl backs himself into a corner, confused as to why the one person who can help him is refusing to do so.

“Are you perhaps saying that you do not want to help me in this, my most dire moment of need??”

“No.” Mariko replies in a frozen tone, her glare deeply sunken into the VR image of the volleyball in her hands. “I’m saying that I can’t.”

“Then what am I supposed to do?”

“Find a way to conquer your fears I suppose.”

“You make it sound like I can simply do that on my own!”

Mariko bites her lip. “So you expect me to do it for you?”

“I don’t expect anything from you, but I would very much appreciate some help.”

“Like I said, I can’t help ya!”

Faced with the sudden realization that only he can do something about this predicament, panic takes control of his body, which maneuvers his legs into a sprint. The insects give chase as he bellows out his objections.

The long legged lad's brisk movements run contrary to what his delicate appearance might suggest, and he makes it to the other side of the gym in just a few strides. The fleeting time afforded to him only does enough to allow his eyes to scour the gym for his next place to run, and it’s then he notices that on one side of the volleyball net, the squares of the court are illuminated in green light.

The green light looks inviting, similar to a portal circle one would find in a fantasy game, and the bobbing green arrow above it pointing down is all the evidence Charl needs to give it a try. Rushing over to the court, he spends the next few seconds in apprehension as the encroaching bugs inch closer. He’s relieved when they all gather on the other side of the volleyball net and face him like foes on the opposite end of an ancient battlefield.

“I’m saved!”

{Question #4: Mariko, you are in a cafe in Paris and want to order a coffee. Pick the correct option and receive 5 more volleyballs.

A: Bonjour, un café sivouplé.

B: I am American, give me coffee asap!

C: Excusez-moi monsieur, puis-je vous déranger pour un café?_}

The flashing green light adjacent to Charl and the notifications Mariko can see on her screen are prompting her to join him on the volleyball court, yet she hesitates. Charl sends pleading gestures her way as the time ticks down in front of him.

“The answer can be either A or C, but A is easier for you to pronounce.” he says in a tone pleading for a response.

Even she can see that, but the thought of saying out loud words from a language she doesn’t know isn’t what has her wanting to back away, it is instead the reward of answering correctly. By doing this, she will receive even more volleyballs, her mental struggle to carry just one is already too much for her to handle.

“Please come, Mariko, if it wasn't made obvious enough already, I'm begging you here.”

She bites her lip and takes her reluctant final steps into the light, once there she lets out a loud sigh. Hiding her inner frustration at her inability to resist peer pressure, she clicks on the option letter A before proceeding to repeat what she can read.

A successful bell rings in their ears, and they are rewarded for their efforts. Charl’s ping pong ball count goes up by 5 and so does Mariko’s volleyball count.

“Very impressive.” Charl says without hiding his relief. “Coming from a native English speaker, I can't say I'm surprised. French should be easy for you.”

Mariko responds to his praise with a wince.

His relief is short-lived however, because a giant spider jumps from the opposite side of the net and lurches its eight menacing arachnid legs right towards him. Sensing the beast, Charl’s two human legs go limp beneath him and he collapses onto the ground.

Time has come to a lumbering pace, yet thoughts come quick, and visions of the result of this attack flash into their minds. If that spider lands on Charl and blood comes gooshing from his pixelated wounds, there’s no telling if he’ll be able to mentally recover from it.

Mariko can envision it unfolding with stunning clarity, even as the spider inches its way towards him.

Instinct is something that exists without conscious thought, reacting on its own despite the host’s consent to produce the most natural of physical movements. Especially so, if those movements have been pre-trained and honed throughout a lifetime of tireless work.

Mariko’s left foot plants in front of her, her right foot twists outwards and glides across the polished wood floor before pushing off itself. Her left hand rises into the air and her head cants back, her eyes lock in on the gently rotating volleyball that was just tossed up.

Like a whip, her right hand smacks into the ball and propels it forward.

It’s a direct hit. The spider explodes.

Charl is saved.

“W-Wow, that was incredible.” Charl mutters, gazing upon the glistening scepter of saving grace that is the physical form of Mariko Pershing.

She turns away in a puff, but a sigh releases the tension in her shoulders when she replies, “Don’t think you’re off the hook here, if I’m forced into facing something I can't stand, I’m not doing it alone.”

Leaning down, she reaches her hand out to him. “So get back to your feet…”

He grabs onto her hand.

“It’s time for you to kill some friggin’ bugs!”

With the force of an olympic weightlifter, she yanks him up.

“Whhaa??”

“This game can only be won if the two of us work together. You need to put those ping pong balls to use.”

“B-But--”

“But nothing!”

Mariko faces the bugs, and with her back turned to him she speaks with a heightened level of certainty. “We can’t keep running away from things that make us uncomfortable, it’ll always catch up to us in the end.”

“Mariko..?”

“Even though I've always known it, I still ran away in the end, and now I'm left wondering if I made the right choice for myself. But in this room we both have ourselves a partner, so try and find strength to conquer your fears through me, we both don’t need to run anymore!”

“Ah…”

{Question #3:} 

Tani’s mechanized voice slings into their ears with the abruptness of a popping balloon. 

{Charl, you are on a beach holiday and have been asked for directions to the water by an English speaking stranger. How will you choose to answer?

A: I’m sorry, je ne parle que Français.

B: It’s somewhere in that direction.

C: I will guide you there._}

The corner of Mariko’s lips rise, curling onto her toes and twisting towards Charl in one smooth motion she says, “The answer is C.”

Charl suddenly feels he has the strength to look upon the snarling bugs on the other side of the net; holding the ping pong paddle in his hand, he remembers Mariko’s form from earlier and postures himself into an athletic stance.

“I will make sure I remember this moment, Mariko. Perhaps you have become another inspiration for my manga.” Clicking on the C option on his screen, he confidently says, “I will guide you there.”

An affirming bell rings. Both of their ammo caches are topped off.

As soon as they gain their respective balls, a beetle jumps over the net at Mariko, and a cockroach scurries under the net towards Charl.

They both let their instincts take over.

They score direct hits.

------------------------

Flat on his back on the polished wood floor, Charl allows a series of heavy breaths to escape his mouth looking no different than someone who just completed a twelve round brawl with a heavyweight boxer.

“We did it.”

“We did!” Mariko flexes. “That was a much more physically demanding  task than I thought it’d be, especially when the bugs started coming at us in bunches. I bet you're feeling pretty damn good right about now. You conquered your fears like a champ!”

“I couldn’t have done it without your help.”

“Hehe, that’s what teammates are for.”

“Teammates... I guess you're right." Charl lifts his hand above his face and stares at it through his goggles. "Though I still hate bugs, maybe I’m not as afraid of them as I thought I was. To think I’d let something like that put me in such a state for so long. Truly goes to show how difficult it is to let go of the bad things in life.”

Mariko takes a seat on the ground next to Charl, twirling her braid in her hair, she looks down at him and asks, “Bad things?”

“Ah, alas, you wouldn’t know…" Charl contemplates for a moment, but once his raised hand falls back to his chest, he allows himself to elaborate further. "When I was a kid back in France, I was bullied a lot. I had different traits and characteristics from the other boys, and the kids at school enjoyed punishing me for it.”

Mariko wasn't expecting the topic of conversation to lead to that, so she shrinks back on impulse.

“O-Oh…”

“My hair was long and straight, and since my school didn’t have a dress code, I chose to dress the way I viewed myself at the time.”

He runs his fingers through his hair, the eyes hidden beneath the goggles staring up towards the roof and seeing the vivid images of an event long since passed and preferably forgotten.

“When I was 10, our science class had a vivarium where we kept a few bearded lizards. Every other day a student was chosen to feed the reptiles their crickets and roaches from the bug box we kept in the room closet. It was gross, but I was able to handle it whenever it was my turn.”

In his mind's eye, he’s back in his old school’s playground. In the corner of these grounds are a series of bushes and trees which are easily hidden from the watchful eye of the adult chaperone. He was coerced by a classmate of his to go to that hidden place, and it is there that he was set upon by five boys and held down amongst the bushes.

He’s blocked out the details of their faces, he can only see devilish grins underneath eyes blurred out by the light of the bright sky above them. He can clearly hear their cackles and insults however, those rotten little voices stepping on his mind between his ears with the force of a giant.

“One of the boys had snuck out with the bug box during lunch break, and a group of them pinned me on the ground. The ringleader dumped all the bugs on my long hair and the insects got tangled in it. The boys lifted up my dress and flung what was left of the bugs onto my stomach and chest, there was nothing I could do. When I tried to scream my mouth was covered, it was then that I completely froze. I can still feel those little legs crawling all over me.”

“That’s awful!”

“It was indeed quite awful… I’m not sure if it was only the bugs or if it was the actions of my classmates that changed me, because from that day on, I cut my hair short and stopped wearing girl’s clothes. And I’ve been horribly afraid of any and all insects ever since.”

“Ugh…” Mariko clenches her fists at his expense. 

"In a way, that day killed a part of me that I loved about myself. So having been confronted by the reminder of it made for quite the hard battle."

“To think I forced you into challenging something like that as though it wasn't a big deal, I’m so sorry.”

“You don't have to apologize, this can be placed solely on Akihiro-kun's head.”

“Oh yeah... Yeah, you’re right! What the hell, Akihiro!?”

Charl lets out a chuckle and sits himself up, “Indeed, but this was good. It’s just like he said earlier, I think persevering through this has really done wonders. Right now I can't help but feel like killing those bugs with my own efforts brought a piece of me back to life.” Putting his hand on his chin he ponders aloud. “Though, I have no idea how he found out about this. Perhaps my manga's main character is also a secret DGSE spy posing as a high schooler?”

“He’s definitely shady. I wouldn’t be surprised if he is some government's spy!”

“If he used my fear of bugs to help me learn English, that means he used your weakness against you to help with your French. So… I'm guessing it has something to do with volleyball?”

Mariko's eyebrows lift into her forehead, she hadn’t given the coincidence any thought until now, and it explains why she and Charl were chosen to go into the gymnasium in the first place.

“I mean, there ain’t no way my issue is as valid as yours. In fact, I’m pretty embarrassed about my feelings now that I think about it!"

“No one’s story is invalid, as an author of many stories, I can assure you that your truth is as real as anyone else's. I would really like to know.”

Scratching her cheek with a cautious laugh, she looks away. “I-I mean, I recently quit the volleyball club.”

“And that’s all?”

“Yup!”

Charl's azure eyes send a knowing glare her way. 

Sweat falls down her temple and steam rises from her head.

“A-Alright that’s not all… I’m also like, really good at it, maybe even the best player in all of Tokyo.”

“Why did you quit?”

“The truth is, volleyball became my identity both here and at home. My friends are all my former teammates, my parents always pushed me to practice and be the best. Everyone I know expected me to be great at it, my teammates used me to help them, my parent's used me to make themselves feel proud. No one sees me as anything other than the star player.”

“So the pressure of it got to you?”

She shakes her head. “It was pressure at one point, sure. But soon I didn’t worry about whether I succeeded or failed, I started feeling indifferent to the whole lot of it. That’s when I realized that I wasn’t playing volleyball for the love of the game like I did when I first started. I was playing solely because I was good at it, I was playing because that’s how everyone viewed me."

“I see, an identity crisis...”

Mariko is reminded of the story Charl had just told her, and she quickly downplays her woes in her head. Yet his genuine reaction to her story pushes her to allow herself to believe that her feelings are justified.

"A simple identity crisis, but a crisis nonetheless. In a spur of the moment decision during practice, right here on this very spot, I let myself be selfish for once in my life. I haven't gotten over how much that disappointed everyone. It's been weeks and my mom still hasn't looked me in the eye. I'm worried that competitive American spirit of hers will keep her from ever seeing me as anything other than a quitter."

"I'm sure she'll understand one day."

"Who knows... I've even lost most my friends here at school. The team is doing poorly, and they all blame me for their troubles. Every day on my way to the Languages club I pass by the gym while they practice, and some of them stop what they're doing just to scowl at me."

"I'm sure they'll understand too."

"I just wanted to do something for myself for once, if they don't like the version of me that isn't their teammate, maybe I don't even want them to understand?"

Charl lets a sharp breath escape his nose before standing to his feet. Looking down at her, he holds out his hand and says, "It's easy to say that now, I think you'll regret letting them go so easily. Just because they can't see that you needed to be your own person, doesn't mean they won't like this version of you once they get to know you. Just give them some time."

"...I guess I can do that."

She grabs his hand, and to her surprise he pulls her up to her feet with a strength she thought wasn't possible of him.

Charl is enamored by the girl in front of him, if he had his notepad he would certainly be jotting down her mannerisms and tone of voice. He can think of a few ideas already. He just needs to confirm one pressing question,

“So who are you, really?”

“I have no clue.” she replies immediately with a sheepish grin.

“Oh?”

“I don’t know who I am yet, I just know what I’m not. I’m kinda hoping to figure that out while I’m here with ya’ll in the Languages club.”

“Wow… wow!” Charl excitedly squeezes her hand. “You’re amazing!”

“Hah??”

“Hahahaha yes, you are definitely amazing! You have courage, the most admirable of traits for a character. How would you like to join a love triangle?"

"A love triangle??"

"In my manga, you are a perfect secondary love interest for my MC."

"Ehhhh but isn't the MC supposed to be Akihiro? I'mma pass on that!"

"I can see it unfolding now," Charl is starry eyed underneath his goggles and swings Mariko into a waltz underneath his arm. "The school's sports idol quits her club and join's my MC's club in the hopes of fulfilling a hidden love. Such a magnificent unrequited romance ensues between the idol and the unsuspecting bookworm, you'd be playing a perfect foil to the already established couple! Perhaps I even go the harem route? So many love interests to choose from already!"

"I do not consent to my likeness being used in this story! I only joined the Languages club cause Principal Togashi told me I could put in zero effort and still get credits. I would hardly call that unrequited love!"

[The Principal said what!?!? That damn bast---ssshhhckkggcckk!!]

Tani's voice comes crashing into their ears like a bolt of lightning before abruptly trailing off into a static screech. They can't be sure, but that last bit sounded an awful lot like the headset was thrown against the wall in frustration.

"Eeeep!"

"!?"

The two of them have just realized that Tani was listening in the entire time, and conflicting emotions flood their chests. Both embarrassment and incredulity hold hands inside them and yank at each other in a fight for dominance.

"Dude, Akihiro really is super shady!!"

Charl releases an awkward chuckle and pulls at his collar, "That's my MC, what a guy." 

"Definitely not the kinda guy worthy of my character's affection!"

The two share a laugh as a way to dispel all that they just went through. To both their surprise, they find themselves feeling grateful for being put in a situation that allowed them overcome a great obstacle that has been holding them back. In the end, they have their eavesdropping monster of a club President to thank for that, and the thought of it is comical.

{Question #15:_}

Tani's computerized voice returns, whatever momentary outburst he suffered through has done enough to return him to back to normal.

{Charl, you have noticed something out in the distance, and need to inform your English speaking partner about it. Which of these options is best? Answer correctly and receive 'Time'.}

"No way, I thought we beat this game already! We conquered our fears didn't we??"

A: There's a snake in my boot!

B: I would like one cotton candy.

C: Look behind you...

Charl's shoulders stiffen up.

Mariko sees his reaction and sighs before saying, "The answer is C, the other two don't make any sense."

Charl struggles to lift his shaky finger and point over Mariko's shoulder.

"L-Look behind you..."

"Yeeeesh ya didn't have to say it like that. Gave me the creeps."

"Mariko, for real, look behind you."

She doesn't know how, but a cool zephyr dances off the nape of her neck. The hair on her arms stand up on end, alerting her to the looming presence of someone or something staring holes into her back.

She quakingly turns around to see it in a blink. The action brings an instant result of sending her nerves into a free fall.

Standing a mere footstep away is a woman in dressed in a tattered white robe hovering above the floor, her greasy black hair dangling over her face in front of her. 

It is a ghost.

"EEYYYAAAAHHH!!!!?"

Mariko flings herself into Charl in a panic.

It's then that an affirmative bell rings, and the ghost in front of them vanishes from sight.

[Ha! Thinking you were finished just because you killed some bugs. Fear and loathing are two different things, you will retain no knowledge from the latter. So now it's your turn to truly conquer your fears, Mariko, and in return you will obtain a knowledge that will show our Principal just what it means to breeze through my Club. So go forth, my cowardly student, win this battle for yourself!]

Mariko lets out a frightened groan while watching the time on her goggles tick down from 10. Once that timer hits zero, there's no telling what kind of apparition awaits her.

Charl gently squeezes her shoulder and steps in front of her as though he were a guard dog.

 "Don't worry..."  With a softened smile, he says something in English that he learned earlier in this game, "I will guide you there."

He will not soon forget those words.

Night of the Virtual Dead: Mariko and Charl... Success!