Ripples in the Pond

“What kinds of things really make you think of home? Of Akkeshi?” Kazuki asked Renka as they finished their food and drank tea together in the café.

Renka sipped her tea, seemingly taking the time to think about her answer to his question. She set her cup down on its saucer.

“Well, whenever I think of Akkeshi, I think of the beautiful, white snow in the winter, the smell of the ocean standing on the shore, the view looking down the steps of Kokutai Shrine, the flowers outside the train station in spring, the bridge between the two parts of town. I think these are the things that I loved the most about Akkeshi. The things I miss when I’m feeling homesick living here in Tokyo.” She paused. “What about you? What reminds you of Yoshino?”

Kazuki’s lips turned up in a slight smile. “I was thinking about this all day, really. For me, it’s things like the breeze blowing through the fields. It’s so peaceful, and I could stand on the tiny bridge across the river all day listening to the leaves rustling and the water flowing underneath me. And of course, I always think of the food. Yoshino has the best torimeshi. I wish I learned how to make it properly before I left. Oh! And every time I see a spider, I think of the giant orb weaver that made its web across the bus stop in the middle of town.”

Renka made a disgusted face. “Spiders? I don’t think we should put that in the song.”

“You mean you don’t want to sing a song about spiders and oysters? I think it could be a big hit.” Kazuki joked.

Renka rolled her eyes with a laugh. “Maybe we can save that for another time.”

“Alright, alright.” Kazuki chuckled.

Renka’s hand moved to the ribbon in her hair, and she absentmindedly fiddled with the fabric between her thumb and index finger. Kazuki noticed she seemed to play with her hair ribbons quite a bit, especially if she was thinking about something or if she seemed unsure of herself.

“You wear ribbons a lot,” he stated bluntly. He berated himself internally for making such a plain statement then added, “They look nice on you.”

“Oh, thank you.” Renka smiled somewhat shyly. “I got most of them from my grandmother. She used to give me one every year for my birthday.”

Used to. Kazuki wondered if he should ask whether her grandmother was still around. It seemed like too personal of a question, and he didn’t want to upset her.

“Does your grandmother like music like you do? Or anyone else in your family?” He tried changing the subject slightly.

Renka nodded. “My grandmother loved music. She used to be a concert pianist. She taught me everything I know about music and composing, and she’s the one that told me to chase my dreams and move to the big city. My parents weren’t so sure about me pursuing a career in music, so I studied finances, and now I work as an accountant. Music is just a hobby for now, but I want it to be more.”

Kazuki’s heart ached at her words. He’d experienced a similar lack of support from his parents when he told them he wanted to become a musician, and like Renka, he’d studied in university to get a corporate job in Tokyo.

“I know exactly what that’s like. I ended up going to school for biochemistry. My family wanted me to be a doctor, but I stopped after my bachelor's degree, and I work in a pharmaceutical company. It pays the bills, but I don’t think they’re all that happy about it.” He shrugged.

“We really do have a lot in common with each other, don’t we?” Renka said.

“Yeah, we do. I’m glad we met.” Kazuki meant those words wholeheartedly. Although he hadn’t known Renka for long, he felt a strong connection and a sense of comradery with her. He felt like he understood her struggles since they related so closely to his own, and it made him want to help both her and himself fulfill their collective dream.

“I’m glad too.” Renka grinned at him, taking another sip of her tea.

A silence fell between them as they both drank their tea. Kazuki’s thoughts drifted back to his dream from the night before and what Yoshino meant to him. What really defined ‘home’ other than the sights and sounds and smells? They had discussed the feelings these things evoked, but he found it difficult to really put into words. Maybe he could at least come up with a melody to convey the feelings that welled in his heart when he thought of the place he called home, and he hoped that Renka, with her lyrical nature, would be able to write beautiful words to really get the point across to the audience.

Renka set down her cup. “Do you ever worry that home won’t be the same anymore now that you’ve left?”

Kazuki’s chest grew tight at the idea. “I’m not sure.”

“Sorry, it’s a strange question,” Renka laughed a bit awkwardly. “It’s just something I think about sometimes. Things change as time goes on, and now that I’m not in Akkeshi, I wonder if one day I’ll go back, and everything will be different. Maybe the town will be unrecognizable to me. The buildings and roads might change, people will come and go, grow old, have children, die…”

“I think that’s just a part of life we need to accept. Everything changes, whether you’re there to see it or not.”

Taka’s words from his dream repeated in his head. Do not forget. He didn’t think he could ever forget his beloved Yoshino, but could the same be said for the town? Would Yoshino forget him one day? Like ripples in a pond, would his memory just fade to nothing? As if he had never been there at all?

Renka’s smile returned. “You’re right. It’s no use dwelling on something like that. Home will always be home, even if it looks different, right?”

Kazuki smiled back. Her smile was contagious. “Exactly.”

Renka glanced at the clock on the wall. “It’s getting late. I think I should probably head home, but I’ll send you a copy of the application for the song festival, and we can get together to fill it out another time, okay?”

“That sounds great.”

They both stood from their chairs and made their way to the register to pay for their food and drinks before heading outside. The sun had set, and the streets were illuminated by bright advertisements and shop signs. Kazuki gazed at Renka, and the two remained just outside the café for a moment as if collecting all their thoughts on the things they had discussed together inside.

“I’ll see you again soon.” Renka’s lips turned up in a wide grin. “Have a good night!”

“You too.”

Kazuki watched her disappear into the crowds walking along the street before slowly making his own way back to his apartment for the night. The weight on his chest that had plagued him since his strange and somewhat disturbing dream vanished. It was nice having such a positive person in his life now.