2

I remember...

My neighborhood wasn't a friendly place...

There were a lot of angry faces roaming around...
And most of them didn't seem to like us even one bit...

I don't know what we did...
To any of them...
To justify this behavior...

But for one, I know...
I never caused any trouble for anyone...
Except my mother...

I might have...
Disappeared on her...
A couple of times...
Or more...

Well...
Despite her warnings...

But, staying here...
Cooped up at home all day...

I have done that for as long as I can remember...

I remember...

I have had a lot of strange feelings lately...

Feelings of repeating myself...
Feelings that I was following a predetermined path in my life...
Feelings that all these that are happening currently...
Had happened before as well...

Now, when I say before...
I don’t mean limited to my past...
At least not my current one...

They seemed like actions that I have done...
I don’t know how to describe it...

In a dream...
Or a long while back...
But I can’t remember the time and place...

Just that...
They feel awfully familiar somehow...

Maybe being confined at home for so long...
Is messing with my head...

But I can’t shake the feeling that...
I was imprisoned before as well...

And in that prison that I was being kept...
I have never escaped from...

But if I haven’t escaped...
How am I right here, right now...?

I need to stop thinking for a while...

I must go outside...
To clear my thoughts...

Dangerous neighborhood or not...
I think the dangers lurking here are worse...

I remember...

The more I stayed at home...
The more flashes I was getting...

And the visions were so clear that...
They didn't seem like a dream anymore...

But whatever I tried...
My mother wouldn’t let me go outside...
Again...

Another one of them...

They are becoming more and more frequent lately...

Tomorrow I will leave home...
No matter what...

I'll wait for her to leave and make my exit...

And...
Another one of those visions...

I remember...

The next day...
Mother left home early in the morning...

It was my best chance to leave as well...

I ran outside without a care in the world...

I didn’t have a specific destination in mind...
I just wanted to see the outside...

I wanted to be anywhere but home...

There were countless places I had yet to explore...
So many wonders to discover...
All simultaneously...

Yet...

The sensation of familiarity...
Persisted alongside me...
Despite knowing that...
I had never ventured away from home before...

I remember...

The strange stares from everyone around...
Making me feel unwelcome...
Like a pariah amidst them...

I hadn't been outside for long...
But I was already beginning to regret my decision...

After a while, some of them began to follow me...

Perhaps it was my imagination...
Or perhaps my fear...
But I couldn't shake the feeling away...

Especially when they drew closer to me...
Attempting to surround me...

I ignored my predicament and their presence...
And continued to move away slowly...

But the circle they were forming around me...
Began to shrink...
Growing smaller and smaller...
Until it felt suffocating...

Soon, their anger surfaced...
And their true motives became as clear as day...

They didn’t want me here...

They wanted me to leave...

But they wouldn't let me go...

I remember...

In the blink of an eye...
I felt a sharp pain in my stomach...

Then a barrage of pain throughout my body...

My brain couldn't process what was happening...
Were they hitting me...?

No...
Perhaps it was something else...

But if they were hitting me...
Then why...?

What have I done to any of them...?
Have I done something wrong...?

Do I have to leave again...?

Leave...
Again...

Have I left before too...?
To where...?

The pain didn’t cease for a while...

It reached a point where...
I couldn’t feel...
Any part of my body...
Anymore...

Why...?
                 Why...?
                                  Why...?

Why do I have to leave this world...
With a ‘why’...?
Again...

Why do I have to leave this world...
Full of regrets...?

Like all the other times...

Like every single one of them...

What have I done...?
And to whom...?

Why am I being punished like this...?

I never harmed anyone...
I never mistreated anyone...

I never...

Lived long enough...

To see the world...

Outside...

Until...

Now...

I remember...

With whatever strength had been left in my body...
With whatever strength had been left in my heart...
With whatever strength had been left in my voice...

From the top of my lungs...

I shouted as hard as I could:

“Please God...
                         If you are there...
                                                         If you can hear me...
                               I beg of you...
                 Please...
                                  Give me one last chance...”