Long Walk

The three of us got a message from Adica a few days later. We were really getting anxious by then, as it had already been a week since that day, and yet we hadn't heard anything from her. 

Reol, I apologize for not getting in touch sooner. My fever wasn't just letting down.

Adica, are you feeling better now?

Yes, I'm finally up and about. I'm really sorry for causing you all this worry.

Don't be sorry. We're just relieved that you're okay.

"Hey Reol," Emma cast a quick look at my direction, as she was setting up some stocks in the display. "I forgot to ask... did you get a message from Adica this morning?" Her eyes darted toward me briefly, seeking a response as she continued to arrange the items.

"Yeah. She said that her fever is down now, and she's doing alright."

Emma's face lit up with a soft smile. "You don't know how relieved I felt" she remarked, her fingers going around fine-tuning the display. "I don't what would've happened to me if I wouldn't hear from her for another day."

The day had been long, and the weariness from our shift at the store had begun to settle in. Emma, however, seemed to be full of energy. As I collected my belongings and made my way to the store's back door, Emma hurriedly caught up.

"Reol, let's get going!" She said, joining me on my way back.

"Go where? Isn't your place in the opposite direction?"

"I'm thinking of paying Adica a surprise visit. Quit dawdling and let's get moving." With that, she nudged me gently, urging me to follow her lead.

As we strolled along the familiar streets, the warmth of the setting sun bathed the surroundings in a soft hued glow. The day had mellowed into a gentle evening, perfect for unwinding. The distant chatter of pedestrians and the occasional car passing by created a soothing symphony. Emma walked with her hands casually tucked into her jacket pockets, her gaze focused on the path ahead. I matched her pace, my hands resting comfortably in my own pockets as we strolled side by side.

The silence between us was comfortable, but short lived, shattered by Emma's loud and I-don't-know-why-so energetic voice. "You know," she began, her gestures punctuating her words, "now that Adica's fever has finally gone down, we should make the most of our free time from here on." Her words tumbled out like a bubbling brook, filled with enthusiasm.

"But after checking the weather forecast first..."

"Yeah, that too!" Her gaze swept over. "I've been thinking... how about a camping trip?"

"Are you talking about those two tourists from that day?"

"After watching them, I've started thinking that camping might be really fun! We can even convince the manager to get the camping tools for discount too."

"John hasn't contacted us since then either. I wonder what he's up to."

Emma's grin widened as she continued, "After Adica gets fully better, let's meet up somewhere again. Maybe the same cafe. We can even try something new from their menu this time."

but there was something that had been pulling at me for days, something I couldn't shake from my mind. I was meaning to ask her, hoping she might know something. But is right for me to poke my nose like that? What if it's something she doesn't want anyone to know? Or am I just overthinking? "Emma," I began hesitantly, "do you have any idea why Adica became unconscious that day at the beach?"

Emma, suddenly stopped in her tracks. Her expression shifted from animated to puzzled, as if my question had caught her completely off guard. "Why are you asking me about that, Reol?" she asked back, her brow wrinkled in confusion.

I sighed, my gaze fixed on the pavement as I walked. "It's been bothering me, you know? I can't just put it out of my head. There must be some reason behind it."

"You saw what happened yourself, didn't you? She just got scared... that's why." She adjusted her jacket, her steps slowing as she chose her words. Her eyes flitted from the sidewalk ahead to meet mine, searching for some sort understanding.

"But..."

"No buts! Stop asking that!" Emma let out a deep sigh, her eyes searching my face again for something. "Reol," she said, her voice low and tinged with a whole mix of emotions, "Please, just stop asking that."

"Then there must be something. Why can't you tell me?"

"And what good will happen even if I tell you? What you'll do? What if it's something even Adica doesn't want anyone else to know!"

I know that... I know that very well. We all want to keep secrets... things hidden from others. Even those whom we care about, call friends or family. But I... I couldn't let it go, not when there was something about that day that didn't sit right with me. I clenched and unclenched my fists, feeling my own frustration build. "Emma, I just want to understand what happened. Adica lost consciousness, and no one's been able to explain why. Even you were acting so strangely. Even now..."

Emma's shoulders tensed, and she shot me a sidelong glance. "Reol, not everything has a neat and tidy explanation. Sometimes things just happen, okay?"

But I couldn't accept that answer. I took a step closer to Emma. "But we can't just ignore it. What if something similar happens again?"

Emma stopped abruptly, turning to face me with a frustrated expression. "Reol, you're overthinking this. Adica's fine now. She had a fever, that's all. It's not like there's some big mystery here."

I felt my jaw clench, my own frustration mounting. "Emma, you're not getting it. I care about Adica, and I want to make sure she's safe. If there's something I'm missing, I need to know."

Emma's hand reaching out to gently touch my arm. "Reol, you can't just assume things. Adica's been through a lot, and if she hasn't shared everything with us, it's because she's not ready."

I nodded again, absorbing her words. She was right, of course. Adica's past was hers to share, and pushing Emma to reveal that would only cause Adica pain. But... "You know what, Emma? I'm just... terrible at so many things. I'm a mess in school, and I can't seem to grasp even the simplest concepts. It's like my brain is wired differently from everyone else's. I've never been good at reading the room, either. I say the wrong things at the wrong time, and it's like I'm always a step behind in social situations." My hands, balled into fists, trembled with the intensity of my emotions. My voice just kept rising, pushing out the words one after the other. "And the worst part is, I don't even try hard enough. I coast through life, never really pushing myself to excel or to understand others better. I've always been this closed book, Emma, and I don't think I've ever truly let anyone in."

My shoulders slumped, and I kicked at a loose stone on the sidewalk. "I'm just... pathetic.

"What's with that?" Finally, the mood seemed to get lighter, following Adica chuckling loudly, "Why're you telling me all that?"

"Like I said, I've never tried enough to understand others. Because I'd never even tried taking the first step. This my first step, Emma, and now it's your turn."

Her usually quick responses seemed to have abandoned her, and for a moment, there was nothing but silence, allowing the sounds of the city around us to fill the void. I watched as Emma's lips parted slightly, forming words that remained unspoken. Her eyebrows knitted together in a mixture of concern and curiosity, and I could almost see the gears turning in her mind.

"Emma...?"

"Oh, it's nothing. Just felt like I had the same conversation with once before..." Then, without warning, her expression softened. It was as if she had discovered a hidden layer of something that she had never seen before. "And shouldn't you be saying all that to Adica though?"

"Yeah, when I'll get the chance..." 

"Do you remember Adica ever talking about her father?" She began, straight with a question. I tried thinking back to my conversations with Adica. "No," I admitted, "I don't remember her mentioning her father."

Emma nodded slowly. "That's because he left them when she was just a little kid. She doesn't talk about it much, but Adica's father abandoned their family. Her mother had to raise her alone for quite a few years before she remarried."

Emma's words draped over me like a heavy cloak. I hadn't known anything about Adica's family situation, and it was clear that Emma was revealing something deeply personal. "She doesn't remember everything very clearly," Emma continued, her voice trembling as if it were walking on a tightrope. "She just passes it on as an accident. But deep down... I believe... she still hasn't been able to get over any of it yet. So, after Adica's father left them, it was all up to her mother to carry their family. And it was really tough for her, as a single mother..."

She pressed her cheeks with her fingers, sliding up to her forehead. "One day, she was in the bathtub, and her mother had just come home from work, exhausted. Then, suddenly, the lights went out. Adica's really scared of the dark, and she started crying loudly. Her mother... her mother was under so much stress that day, Reol. She..." Emma's words faded away, and I saw tears in her eyes.

I was at a loss for words. Part of me wished I hadn't heard it in the first place. I truly didn't know how to respond.

"You know it too... when we're young... we're always trying to get others recognition. We want others to accept us. But when your own mother..." 

"Adica doesn't like to talk about it, and I've never shared this with anyone else. I hope you understand why."

As we stood before Adica's house, I positioned myself a few steps away, watching as Emma approached the front door. Her hand hovered over the doorbell but didn't press it. She hesitated, her gaze fixed on the door as though it held the secrets of the universe, and she was searching for the precise combination of words to unlock them.

Then, almost imperceptibly, Emma withdrew her hand, retracing her path until she was once again beside me. The porch light cast a gentle, almost magical glow around her, yet her eyes sparkled with doubt, like the first stars blinking into existence in the evening sky.

"I can't do it," Her voice sounded like a winter puff. "I don't know how to face her right now or what to even say, even though I partly understand how she might be feeling."

"But I think Adica will be just glad to see you."

Emma shook her head, her lips trembling slightly. "Even if you're not strong enough, sometimes... just being there and seeing through it all is strength. But what if that's not enough? The same thing you were telling me, Reol." She let out a sigh. Her expressions were filled with conflict. "Even after I was with her for so long, I still couldn't take that first step."

Emma gave me a pat me on the back. Her touch felt like a mixture of consolation and resignation, after which she turned and walked back her way.