What's it Worth

Living amongst humans is a drag. In their so-called complexities lies a very simple truth: life is a pointless endeavor. When you come to understand this, things are not so difficult anymore.

A woman, perhaps in her late twenties, leans heavily against the dirty concrete wall across from me and tries to light her cigarette. When it refuses to spark, she grunts and angrily hurls it to the ground, which is when she notices my gaze.

Her eyes narrow at me and she roughly rubs at her tear-stained cheeks. “What are you looking at?” she barks.

I take a puff from my cigarette and smile; there is no bite to her words. “Want to borrow mine?” I say, pulling my lighter out from my back pocket.

She mumbles a quiet thanks and takes it from my hand. At the first puff from her cigarette, her shoulders visibly relax and her posture softens.

We stand across from each other, neither speaking a word but each savoring in the repetitive sounds of traffic and the pattering footsteps of the crowds outside.

“I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me,” she says quietly. A fresh wave of hot tears threaten to spill and she tilts her head upwards to delay the inevitable.

“The world is cruel,” I mutter. “It’s nothing new.”

Her sniffles turn into a sob. “I hate him so much.”

I flick the cigarette to the ground and step on it. “Don’t waste your time on tears,” I say, indifferent to her sobs. “It’s not worth it.”

She harshly rubs away her tears and looks back at me. “Who are you?”

My lips curl upwards at her interest. “My name is Thanatos.”

---

A younger man trudges down the street, his black leather shoes dragging heavily against the dirty ground. The pink in his cheeks darken to a deeper shade and he can barely recognize the path he is on. But still, his grip on the bottle neck tightens as he tilts his head back to take another sip.

I trail behind him, sipping on my own can of beer. “Tough day at work?”

He glances at me and a fire reignites in his eyes. “Every day I think I’d rather get run over by a bus than to clock in into that office and to see those old men,” he pauses, “those demons.”

The lanyard around his neck hangs heavier than he remembers and he takes another angry swig of his drink. His steps slow down and begin to match mine.

“Why put up with them?”

He bites down on the edge of the glass bottle in contemplation for a moment before bringing it back down to his side. His shoulders sag and he turns his tired and glazed eyes to me. “I don’t know.”

I saunter forward and move past him. “Follow me,” I said.

And he does.

---

Through the coffee shop glass pane, I see a woman reading a book. A waitress interrupts her with a cup of coffee and she responds with an appreciative smile. There’s an elegance in her mannerisms that stands her out from the crowd.

I walk in and order my own drink before taking up the seat beside her. Instantly, I’m enveloped in her floral perfume; a pleasant surprise.

A warm coziness blankets the cafe and I take the moment to turn my neck to the side to stretch the stiff muscles in that area.

My black coffee arrives, delivered by the same young girl. I send her a nod before wrapping my hands around the mug, appreciating the warmth that spreads to my chest. I turn and glance at the woman beside me until she notices.

“What a nice place this is,” I say while taking the first sip from the mug.

“Isn’t it?” She beams and I’m taken aback by the cheerfulness that exudes from her very presence.

My eyes focus back to the mustard-yellow color of the mug, rubbing my thumb across the shop’s logo etched on the surface. “Sadly, many of these places are shutting down.”

“That is true,” she replies, slowly closing the book in front of her and placing it to the side. “But there’s also a lot of new places that have opened.”

I shake my head. “It’s not the same. The new places are much too expensive or small.There’s no real place to sit and rest.”

In the absence of her reply, I continue. “All these small businesses are being bulldozed by large corporations and greedy men. What’s the point?”

Her lips curl upwards and she bends slightly to meet my lowered gaze. “What’s your name?”

“Thanatos.”

“Well, Thanatos, there’s still a lot of beauty in this world,” she said, her words slow and sweet like honey.

“Beauty is superficial.”

She licks her lips and ponders over my words. “Love, then.”

I shake my head again, letting out a humorous laugh. “It’s not enough to justify the pain, the cruelty of this world, this life.”

“I don’t know about that.” She cranes her head and glances at the tables across from us and I follow her line of vision.

Her smile widens at the delight that overcomes the little girl sitting in the next table when her mother spoon feeds her her first taste of ice-cream. The little girl giggles and reaches out for the spoon, which causes her parents to bubble up in laughter.

In the booth near the cashier sits four teenage boys. Notebooks and paper scrawled with words are littered across the table. “We’re going to ace this exam!” One of them declares. Immediately, the boy beside him smacks him over the head with a rolled up paper and together they roar with glee.

At the table by the entrance, an old man slowly brings a glass of water to his wife as they wait for their order. The older man hums a familiar tune from his youth and his wife grins. She tilts her head from side to side in time to the rhythm of the song and their hands are clasped together on top of the table.

Eros slowly turns her head back to Thanatos. “I think it is absolutely worth it.”

--- END----