Chapter Six: A Stranger in the Woods.

Ruby was finishing off the tenth arrow, when she caught something in the dark miasma of the forest.

Two eyes glinting back.

Emerging slowly, the toothy grin of a Wolf stepped slowly within the bloom of a snapping campfire.

Ruby kept her gaze fixed, while her left hand angled backward toward a heavy branch.

“This is what happens when you find a stranger in the woods.”

The Wolf growled and launched itself in a hasty attack. Ruby swung the branch up, shoving the stick in its mouth, until it had no choice but to bite down.

The Wolf was considerably lighter compared to the Safe, making it easier to throw forward.

Landing sideways, the creature rolled on its feet and stood motionless, snarling with yellowing teeth. It was joined by two, then three, then six others, slinking out of the gloomy bushes. Twelve nightmares all ready to pounce.

I’m definitely coming back as a Wolf.

Before she could react, there was an ear-splitting scream, followed by an explosion.

 The terrain in front became a cloud of mud and debris, forcing Ruby to covered her eyes and wave away the smoke.

Coughing slightly, she spat out a leaf and looked around.

“What the Ass was THAT?”

“THAT would be the Fire Empress.” Hal said, from somewhere up in a tree. “She doesn’t like people trespassing on her sacred forest, let alone starting fires.” 

Another fireball screamed through the sky, clear against the Azure blue sky. The missile was fast and coming down hard.

In a panic, Ruby started to sprint in the opposite direction.

“Idiot! You’re the one would threw me off a cliff!!” She yelled, quickening the pace, as more meteors were detonated at a faster rate.

“I also started the fire. Well, how else would she know?”

“What the hell is wrong with you?!”

“Quite simply, this exercise teaches you how to dodge.”

“You could have taught me in the GYM.”

“The Gym is reserve for fighter’s only, not weak little kittens.”

Ruby looked back to see more trees blasted away. Many charred craters were being formed, with a safety margin of mere inches.

“Why is she destroying her own forest?”

“The idea is since the trees will grow back, there is no real harm done.”

“That’s not what sacred means!!”

Ducking down behind a tall rock, she caught her breath as Hell was blasted on either side. Now covered in greasy sweat and dirt, Ruby’s lungs were aching, but she was determined to keep going.

“How are we doing?” Hal said, leering down from the top of the rock. “Having fun yet?”

“Has anyone told you…how annoying you are?”

“I’ll tell you what’s really annoying.” Hal said, and stood up with her arms spread wide. “WHEN SOMEONE GIVES AWAY YOUR POSITION! AH-HA-HA!”

Incensed, Ruby burst into a run toward the sunlit forest.

Several choice words for her tormentor were cut short by the sudden appearance of a towering cliff, which dropped her heedlessly into a chaotic river.

 Unable to stop, she was carried by the raging torrent.

Trying with all her might to keep herself above water, Ruby had no choice but to be tossed and pitched against the insane current, until it took her down, down, down into the murky depths.

The last thing she remembered before passing out, was a feeling of wet sand against her body and the cheerful voice of Hal Caesar overhead.

“Hoo-hoo!” The masked Maid said. “You don’t get to die a second time, that’s unfair on the others.”

Then everything went black.

::::::::::::  Images swim back into view. The Wastrel is bending over in short trousers and blinking fast.

Huh, wh-when did I get dressed?

Looking up, the blood orange sun sinks low against a Mackeral sky. It’s a warm day, must be…

…Spring again. Wait, how did I know?

The Wastrel stretches. His vision clears and finds himself standing on a dirt road, lined with houses that look abandoned. It’s not a reincarnation, but a memory.

He recognises this place. It is somewhere from his youth, when he was a nineteen year old, living alone in a rundown Pig farm surrounded by grim countryside, that always looked on the verge of raining, (until it did).

The street is cracked,  with wild grass peeking through old buildings, which creak like ships.

It would be a Ghost town if it weren’t for the desperate-looking people shambling around. They seemed to be destitute, hungry. The ones that look up give a vision of defeat, an overwhelming sense of hopeless.

The Wastrel has a flash of realisation.

Oh, I’m back in Skid Row. An Alternate version of fifteenth Century China, where Diabetes and CPR are already known.

He is facing a dark alley, with a stick in one hand and leading a Mule in the other. At the far end, two men have pinned a young woman up against a wall. They don’t look friendly.

Without a second thought, he strikes the nearest man with one blow and takes the legs out from under the other in a single flourish.

 Returning to his Mule, he trudges past the girl, who is beside herself with confusion. For some reason he has no desire to check if she is okay.

In the open, she is easier to distinguish, with her green hair and blue eyes. What she must have thought of this tall, skinny man with his black shirt open to reveal burns was anyone’s guess.

If anything, the giant hat covering his face must have been the most intriguing thing.

“You didn’t have to do that.” She says.

“They were in my way.” The Wastrel replies, in his best above-it-all growl.

The girl gets to her feet and brushes off.

“I know you,” She says. “You’re the Surgeon.”

The Wastrel stops for a moment. “Huh.”

Ah yes. That was his calling in these parts: Skid Row Surgeon. Since his talents were rare and mostly free, he had the protection of both law enforcement and criminal elements. Especially The Sisters, ex-pirates who ran Skid Row and would on occasion not bother to pay in coin, but use their feminine wiles in kind.

The girl is waiting for answer, but The Wastrel says nothing and keeps on walking.

“I can treat your burns,” She says.

“I have a Salve. It’s a numbing agent.”

“What kind?”

“Tea Tree Oil and crushed Glow worm.”     *This is not recommended*.

“You can make medicine?”

“And Booze. Why’d you think they call me ‘Pigman: Alchemist’?”

I should never have left her. I should have…got to know people. ::::::::::::::::::::::::::

                                                                                ***

After regaining consciousness, the first thing Ruby could make out was an irritating light overhead, flickering like a hallway in a horror movie.

I hope this world is a better one. She thought. I’ll even go back to being a Sleep Paralysis Demon. Anything.

Next came the sound of a hospital screen being scraped back and someone slapping her feet.

“Wakey, wakey!” Callie Mazoo said. The patient looked up to see the hooded Maid staring down at her. “Really thought ol’ Hal did a number on you.”

Pushing herself up, Ruby could feel every bone burning with anger. The smug expression on Callies' face didn't help either.

Look at her smirking under a hood, like some Manhwa protagonist. 

“Where am I?” Ruby asked.

“Still got no memory? It’s the infirmary next to the Gym.”

“Why am I here?”

“How should I know? I can’t be everywhere.”

Callie smiled and helped her off the bed. Using the Assassin’s shoulders as a crutch, Ruby hobbled toward the door and leant against the wall.

“I think I’m going to be okay.” She said, before spotting a weapon on a nearby table. “Whaaaa…holy Shiiiiiiiiv!!!”

“Oh yeah,” Callie said. “A common sight nowadays. Some people don’t want to fight fair.”

Ruby could feel a teardrop form at the back of her head.

“Heh. Something to look forward to.” She said, nervously.

“Come on,” Callie said, handing over a bottle of water. “Let’s get you caught up on the basics.”

“Ah yes, a good excuse for some exposition.”

***

A short corridor led straight into an area the size of a school gymnasium.

Two scuffed and worn Boxing rings filled the mid-section surrounded by heavy bags and speedballs, hanging from the walls.

Everything smelt of old sweat, copper and caustic human exhaust.

"Hoo boy, that's ripe." Ruby said, pinching her nose.

“You gotta learn to live with it. If you want any chance of a better life.”

“Watch it! Watch it!” Someone cried to the left.

Ruby was stunned to see a Maid being launched high into the air, before landing outside of the ring, into a bed sheet held by four others.

“Needless to say.” Callie added. “It helps to make friends while you can.”

“That was a straight upper-cut.”

“ ‘Strike at Midnight’. One of Helga’s signature moves. She clips you with that, it’s Coma city all the way.”

“Helga?”

Callie nodded toward the Gorilla-shaped woman, with fists like Milk pans, stalking back to the corner.

What marked her out from the other Maids, was how she wore a Head Dress fashioned from a full-sized Grizzly Bear; the upper teeth scraping her forehead.

“Helga Bearmonger; the living embodiment of a ‘No Go’ area.”

“ Can you beat her?” Ruby asked.

“In a fair fight? No. Her punches come with the force of a train crash. Her one weakness though, is a bad field of vision…must be Glaucoma or something.”

“Or maybe because she’s wearing a Bear on her head.”

“Either way, it explains her C-Grade status.”

“She’s only a C-Grade?”

“That’s pretty high up for us rabble.” Callie said and gestured to toward the wall-sized board displaying names and their ranks. “The Prison adopted a Guild-style rating system: ie F-Rank to Double S. It’s simple, the more you climb, the bigger the perk.”

“What kind of perks?”

“Better quality of life, obviously. Nicer beds, yummy desserts, use of the Bathhouse.”

“There’s a Bathhouse… in a Prison?!”

“Well we can’t have a group chat without at least one Bathhouse incident.”

Ruby gave the reader a sly look. “What are the chances, eh?”

“Exactly.” Callie said, knocking back more water.

“So, what does the SS rank get?”

“You name it. The full works. High life, Gold stylin’, full fat security and a floor to themselves. Not to mention a chance to live in the luxury apartments.”

Ruby nearly choked. “Luxury apartments? Is that part of the Prison?”

“Not that you’d know it. The Prison is divided into five blocks, for every block there is one champion; the biggest meanest bad ass that everyone avoids. You gotta take them out if you wanna make your way up the rankings.”

“Stage Bosses, got it.”

“Bingo. Now, up until recently, SS or ‘Peak’ was the highest point. A Grandmaster level, if you will. Well, the top Brass got a bit nervous, thinking those luxury apartments would be filled up in no time. So, they decided to add a God Tier level: Red Rank.”

Ruby shook her head and smiled.

“Is anyone actually living in those luxury apartments?” She said. “It sounds like it’s gonna be empty for some time.”

“Only one has made it.” Callie said, pulling out a scrap of aging paper. “The one no-one can beat.”

Ruby unfolded the paper and felt her ghost die in an instant.

Staring back with arms folded, was the imposing figure of Star-Anis.