DOROTEA - Shuffle

     "Well then..." I think out loud " Who should I invite to my party?" Tap tap on my forehead with a pen.

     "How you doin' with that hon?" asks my father, who's in the kitchen.

     "I've hit a few bumps" honestly, I wanna ask my father for advice.

     "Like?... " my father grasps my need, I can tell.

     "Mainly friends and acquaintances I haven't reached out in a while. But someone is bothering me. Remember José dad?"

     "Your ex? How could I forget him, he was around all the time a lifetime ago" my dad grins, he liked him.

     "So basically we ended up on good terms, but since then honestly I haven't made any move to, at least, catch up on how he's doing and I kinda feel bad about it- throw the pen into the living room, this topic stresses me out."

     "But if everything was good between you when you broke up, why wouldn't you invite him even if you haven't seen each other these years?"

     "Partly because I feel ashamed I was such a bad friend back then, he did try to keep our friendship alive and I just moved on away from anything between us. "

     "Can I know why?" he grabs a beer from the fridge, I gotta run soon.

     "Super honest? It wasn't a priority, not in the way that I purposefully think of not going out with him, it just didn't popped in my mind go seeing him. I always think of Eva or Dario but him... I don't know honestly."

     "Ok, so let me reformulate my question. Why would you even think of inviting him at all? I mean, what's the whole purpose of the doubt" He's gonna open the can, shit...

     My dad opens his beer just to see it explode. I shook the can in the morning just to see who would open it. My dad screams out of rage, it spilled all over him, apparently he doesn't blame anyone on the act, must think it was an accident inside the fridge or anything, if it wasn't for me laughing he wouldn't know. So I flee.

     "Sorry dad! I have to put on some clothes! Will see Eva! Love you!"

     He walks grunting towards the bathroom. He's gonna clean himself I guess. Totally worth it. Gotta be goin'.

...

     "An american coffee please" already at the restaurant, walking towards our table, I still have lingering over me the conversation from an hour ago. Dad's right, why was I thinking about inviting him? I sip my coffee. Already at the table, I stare at Eva, who's watching through the window some pigeons being fed by a man "Eva, I think we never talk about men at all."

     "That's because we never had the chance... or interest in the topic" She takes a sip at his espresso, always too bitter for me, but for some reason she always seems to think it could be even more bitter.

     "I know. But now's the chance" Open my eyes the widest I can, If I was a cat she would be dead from my cuteness "Tell me, who would you say is your kinda guy?"

     "My kinda guy?" She looks up to the sky as if she was just realizing how big the universe actually is "I actually don't know. Honestly that is just not something I think a lot, always relied heavily on instinct on that part, I like someone and that's it, it's not something I have in my head all the time" She stretches backwards, looking way more hot than she ever realizes "I'd like to tell you that intelligence and general attitude towards life are my main concerns but no, it's all about a hunch I guess" I know what she means, she's like a wild animal moving thru the wilderness following noises and smells, but maybe we can extract information if we look at her past partners. What is this National Geographic? She would totally be a tiger.

     "And from your ex boyfriends, can you tell if there's anything linking them all? Some common traits? Anything?" Eva looks down to the floor as if she was someone just realizing how small the world actually is. Is that an ant? I guess the world really is a small place.

     "Maybe... Alan was so reserved, didn't interact much with strangers and was cocky. Jorge on the other side was more extroverted and not so cocky, Nathaniel had his own way of being cocky, super friendly tho."

      "I do remember Nathaniel, didn't struck me as the cocky type."

     "That was because of his friendliness. Was more about his constant state of mind than his way of being with others. He was like those drinks that on the surface has one consistency but underneath there's another" She looks at his cup, now empty. Surely she's thinking about ordering another espresso. Must follow the tiger the whole way through.

     "So the trait linking your past couples is cockiness?" We both laugh.

     "Now that you mention it, maybe, but if that was the case I don't think it is the particularity of that trait, maybe I like confident people you know? Someone who puts one feet after the other firmly and with a clear purpose, sadly, being cocky is a by product or the other way around or something. Have you seen the first Jurassic World film?"

     "The first of the new ones, isn't it?"

     "Yes."

     "Yup, why for?"

     "At some point, if I'm not misremembering, they say that in order to create the dinosaur they wanted they added genetic parts from other dinosaurs but in the final product, the dinosaur itself, it was impossible to separate some traits from their biological functions. If they wanted a sharp-toothed monstrosity that meant adding, without a way around, lethality and aggressivity. Some things you just can't separate."

     "You know what" Gonna try picking on her a little.

     "What?"

     "I think I haven't watch that movie, must've been thinking of another one and now you've spoiled it for me" I put my most serious face ever.

     "Haha so funny" Eva sticks out her tongue and I laugh, she's always the hardest "Regardless, are you getting what I mean?"

     "Yes sir."

     "Maybe that's how it is when you meet someone, there are a lot of stuff you're gonna like about them but in the end there's a high chance something you like is gonna be irrevocably bounded to another thing that, at the very least, is not gonna be very enjoyable. Maybe the knight in shining armor is bound to be a macho type who thinks you're not capable of doing anything, and you can't separate those things from the other, either you give up or end up alone."

     "So you're saying everyone is gonna have a minimum of things you're gonna dislike about them?"

     "Yes madam" She waves for the waiter, she definitely needs more coffee.

     "So you don't believe in soulmates?" the waiter approaches, I think he is called Ernest. His family is ancient to this place. In the past they were rich and influential but his father took some really bad decisions and they ended up with very little, now he works here.

     "Soulmates as in...? A double espresso please" Eva tells the waiter.

     "Do you need anything?" he asks me.

     "No thanks honey" I wink at the waiter and he takes off "You know, as in someone who is a perfect match to you. Two pieces that fits perfectly once you put them together."

     "You know you shouldn't do that Dora."

     "Do what?"

     "Picking on the waiter. Later you're gonna have someone drooling over you thinking they have a shot, when we both know they don't. They never have"

     "C'mon I'm just playing, where's the harm?"

     "You say that like there's not a big fat share of broken hearts all around town, all your doing."

     "Ya ya, sorry. Won't do it again. But answer me" I blink towards Eva, hoping my cuteness gets through to her, but the tiger is angry. Must flee folks.

     "Soulmates? Too corny."

     "Why? Wait, I must hit the restroom" I've always disliked this restaurant. Their food is pretty decent but when it comes to the physical place itself is all over the place. The restroom doors often lack locks and never ever have I seen more than one soap dispenser working at the same time. Has it not been for Eva loving their fries (for some reason) we wouldn't even be here "Back. Go on, why corny?" Eva sips from his espresso, which has arrived while I was away.

     "Too ideal to be true. Just don't think it is that easy. you know what I think?- that life is like a rolling stone. By the way, have you heard the live version of that song by the Rolling Stones? Anyway, just like a rolling stone you know the general direction (downward), gravity and all and everything, but you don't actually know where it will hit at the bottom, where it will hit bumps, get stuck etc. Maybe there is someone out there somehow meant for you in a very loose sense, but I take if that's the case, would be more chance than fate."

     "So you don't actually expect your future husband is gonna be a perfect match?" As expected, she ate all the fries, gotta ask for more. Eva has always been intelligent, tho she never shows it off "Just so you know, been thinking about my past, about how a few years ago when we were younger, highschoolers, thinking about having boyfriend was so easy a thing that one jumped without too much of a hesitation, meanwhile today that's more complicated, the ratio between effort and reward seems smaller, the risk too high or bothersome that it seems not even worth it."

     "Wait" she empties her cup clean. Does she even taste the thing? Although given how small the amount of liquid a espresso has I don't blame her "That's like saying that starting a series or movie is not worthy of your time because you don't know if you're gonna end up liking it."

     "But you have trailers, sneak peeks, etc. to let you know the content inside."

     "I know you have a tendency of judging something by its cover, but please tell me there's more to your view" I crack a laugh.

     "I know that's just the premise. The covers often don't make them justice and the premise is basic but the execution is quite on the spot" Eva nudges her hair, short as always "But if you're not into romcoms why bother watching it? if you're lactose intolerant there's no point in eating every chocolate you can put your hands on, just because maybe there is one that's not going to harm you."

     "My point being" She lowers her eyebrows, as someone who's about to throw daggers at your heart, or bite you for that matter "You have to move for the plot to advance. For how you lay it, seems you only wanna circle around stuff you already like, which I know it's not your case but I do know you can sometimes be a little close-minded, watching Friends and Mean Girls, visiting Red Lock, heck I even worry you end up getting back with your ex, just because you already know it, when there are more movies, series and guys left to know. Take me for example, I'm literally" Yes, she's a "literally" person. Love her anyway "Always playing playlists I'm not familiar with in random mode just to found out new stuff and don't be stuck in my square"My ex boyfriend? She does have a point.

     "Actually, talking about exes that's where I wanted to get at" She rolls back her eyes.

     "Ugh. Don't get me wrong. Not talking about how it is wrong to return to the things that have made you good. Just... don't get stuck with ideas."

     "I'm telling you, meeting new people is haaard. Am way too cute to be properly valued."

     "Now now, don't get childish. If doing it is hard, maybe you're overthinking it. Why would you even think now about knowing new people?"

     "Well... Remember José?

     "Your ex? Never met him but I recall, what about him?" Eva apparently devoured another espresso. Isn't that, like, bad or something?

     "So the other day I was organizing my stuff and I found this silly thing... one of his jackets. A lifetime ago I borrowed it from him because it's super comfy and warm and he never used it because he's never cold. A while later we started having problems and in the end we broke up. It seems I put it away to save it from myself."

      "From yourself?" the damn tiger is gonna order another cup.

     "Yes. I throw away all his stuff shortly after we broke up. But this seemed to be hidden. Maybe subconsciously I knew I was gonna throw everything away and hide this, so it would be safe."

     "That's kinda sweet but also kinda creepy. What now, you're missing him?" The waiter doesn't seem to be around. And now that I mention it when I went to the bathroom the whole staff seemed agitated.

     "Nah. Or at least not in that way. Romantically speaking, I mean. You mentioned something about dinosaurs a while ago. And I think... maybe going out with him, being so close to him, blurred my picture of him, he was great, but at times he was not, but we were in a relationship and things were different when we were just friends, everything got tangled and in the end I think we didn't like how we were when were together. And maybe, just maybe, the dynamic worked better when we were just friends."

      "So you're trying to get in touch with him just to be friends?"

     "Kinda. But the whole made me think that maybe I was doing something wrong, that I go about meeting people the wrong way. That's why I'm thinking about going out and meet new people."

     "That actually makes sense, you know. But still, I think you're over-complicating things."

     "Ugh! Meeting new people is not like listening to new songs you know, Evaaa" the tiger has killed me, I give up "I can't just make appear people at random" Weird, I don't see the waiter anywhere.

     "You know what? Why not? Try putting your encounters in shuffle" Damn. Just saw a lighting bulb go full light above Eva. Just wanted to know if I should invite that jerk or not. My fault for not being clear. Maybe I should go the restroom again to threw the conversation astray, still where are the waiters? Don't see any of them "Your party's date is near, isn't it?" Just lose my chance, where was the bathroom? Don't panic don't panic "Why don't you invite people in a random way? You were telling me on the phone your father wanted to smuggle some workers in there, don't you? Just brought more people in, you don't even have to view this in a romantic light, just a fun way of getting to know new people. This town isn't small enough you know all the people in it."

     "That sounds dumb."

     "So dumb it's fun. Invite people in the subway, the marketplace or whatever, just shake things up. It's gonna be fun. The point is getting people there you wouldn't otherwise. Insert chaos so the stone rolls not only downward but in imaginable ways" Eva is enjoying this, hate her.

     "You sure this is not a way of having fun at my expense?" Someone that seems to work here has arrived at the tables and is talking to everyone.

      "That's your thing darling. You're in or what? The venue you're having your party is ridiculously big anyway."

     "I'll think about it" Someone is approaching, now that I see him closer I think is the manager.

    "Hey ladies. I'm Michael and I'm the manager. You've been enjoying your food?" sus, very sus.

     "Yes of course, just that my friend wanted a espresso a while ago but we haven't seen the waiter."

     "Ah, about that, that's why I came here, I'm afraid I'm gonna have to ask you to leave the place, you don't even have to pay for anything. That's all taken care of" Wait, what?