The Human Saint is Bored, so I was Summoned to Another World Vol. 2
After our talk, the Rubinforth siblings led me out of the prison room of their manor’s dungeon and into another room, a more opulent and formal one compared to the first. There, they handed me some clean clothes; it was then that I noticed I was already dirty because of my stay in the cell.
“Big sister has requested me to give you some new clothes.” Sophia explained as she watched me try some shirts, “Actually, she wanted to be the one to come and free you, but our old man didn’t permit her. So, she passed on to me her intentions.”
“It’s better than that weird clothing you wear.” William commented, looking at my ‘Earth’ clothes, “If you’re done, come outside. Our big sister wants to see you.”
I nodded and waited for them to get out of the changing room before I started sorting the clothes they gave me. Honestly, I didn’t know what I should wear or how to wear them. But I guess I needed to show myself before Her Holiness got worried sick about me. It took me a while before I could make sense of some pieces of clothing I received. I mean, man, the people of this world sure had a lot of things to wear on their bodies…
Now that I think about it, the clothes of Lily’s brother she gave to me are quite easy to wear. I wonder if these dresses are just the preference of this place…
When I finally got out of the room, William had his arms already crossed on his chest, and he was already tapping his feet impatiently. Sophia was nowhere to be seen.
“She went ahead of me and told me to wait for you, you slowpoke.”
“Well, as you said, I’m a commoner. I know little about how you wear clothes here.”
“Ugh, just wear something that pleases you. You don’t have to wear everything we gave you.” William snapped, stomping his foot, “Tch. Just how stupid are these commoners, for goodness’ sake?”
You know, it will be good for our ‘working’ relationship if you just keep your ugly thoughts to yourself, you shitty brat. But of course, this was his turf, so I won’t dare say it aloud.
William led me to a hallway that eventually ended in a grand doorway. The gilded doorframes showed that this wasn’t your normal reception room. The boy then knocked two times before the doors were opened for him.
Wow…such a splendid place!
Well, I knew I’ve read a lot of books and stories about an aristocrat’s house before, but seeing it firsthand was a completely new experience. Gilded statues and carved lacquered wooden furniture, velvet carpets on the shiny marble floor, pure white tablecloths with aquamarine trimmings…
This is a far cry from the hall where we were received earlier; this one reeks of opulence.
At the middle of the room was a long, ornamented dining table, covered with quilted tablecloths and with equally ornamented rows of chairs lined neatly to each side. On the table were various dishes—served on golden platters, some of which were completely unknown to me. The Duke sat at the middle, with his guests to his flanks. Strangely enough, his holy daughter was placed on the other middle-end.
Must be because he’s so stupidly averted to big chests…
I’d rather keep my thoughts to myself. I nearly forgot that there were people here who could read minds.
Yep, they noticed. The Human Saint and the Beastman Saint were both staring at me, with their lips drawing a mischievous grin.
“Ahem…” the Duke made known that he wanted everyone’s attention, “Here is the commoner, just as I promised. All safe and sound. I even had him clothed just like what you told me too, my daughter.”
“I’m in deep gratitude for your benevolence, father.” Her Holiness coolly replied. However, I couldn’t help but feel that she’s sarcastic with her answer.
Well, affectionately, she calls him ‘Papa’…
Anyway, I guess they’re in the middle of their meal. Dinner or lunch, I didn’t have an idea. I spent a good deal of time inside that dungeon, so I eventually lost track of whatever time-reckoning I had. Plus, that random talk with the Saint’s siblings further disrupted my body-clock patterns.
I wondered why everyone’s looking at me. I thought they’re busy eating?
“Well, what are you standing there for?” the Duke didn’t hide his irritation, “The dungeon has made you dumb, you fool of a commoner!”
“Oh…sorry.” I headed for the door to let myself out. They’re nobles, and of course, a commoner like me wasn’t accepted into that exclusive circle. It was common sense that I should get out of here as soon as possible. I don’t like it here either.
“Are you still in your senses, boy?” I heard the old man speak again, “Who told you to get out of the dining hall? Your table is over there.”
I turned and look in the direction he showed. A small and simple wooden table and a chair were put up a few distances away from the long dining table. It had food on it, and well, I could tell that somehow, I’m being treated with dignity.
“Hmph! Be thankful that I raised my daughter well enough to care for lowly people like you!”
“Papa!” the Human Saint could not keep back from showing her indignation because of his statement. The Duke immediately became silent.
Seriously, this old dude will not shut up? If you want me to be thankful to you, then why don’t you become like how you raised your daughter?
Well, I ate in silence as the aristocrats at the other table kept on dining while telling their tales to each other. I felt completely out of place, so I just went to make myself as inconspicuous as possible.
Though, if I may say something, I don’t think that’s the ‘noble’ way of eating.
Seriously dude, these nobles were eating in the way I won’t consider an ‘aristocratic’ way of dining. They’re noisy, food was being tossed around, and, what the hell? Did that orange-looking fruit peel just got thrown on the floor?
What the fuck am I watching? Monkeys eating their food? In contrast, I tried my best to maintain my silent dignity and ate like I was taught to.
“Look at the commoner!” it’s the old geezer once again. He’s slightly drunk, “You wouldn’t see such a barbaric way of eating food once in your lifetime, eh?”
Excuse me? This is barbaric? What do you call yourselves then?
“Hah! This is why I hate commoners; they reek of uncivilized manners!”
Uncivilized? There’s something fucked up in the standards of this world. If you guys would come to Earth, I guess you’ll be the ones to get scoffed at. I didn’t want any trouble, so I just kept my mouth shut. However, the Duke’s foul-mouth was getting to my nerves. I mean, come on, I’m just human. Being treated like I’m some kind of oddity and throwing insults at me would make me explode anytime.
My hands are shaking in anger…
I guess Her Holiness could see my thoughts, that’s why she had that concerned look.
“Anyway, Papa, how’s the work at the capital going?” I heard she brought up another topic. Maybe it’s to take his attention away from me? I need to thank Her Holiness later on.
“Hmm?” the Duke said in a gruff voice; he’s slowly being drowned in alcohol, “Well, everything’s fine just as it is! The King was a bit of an airhead, but he’s a good person!”
Man, this guy just can’t keep his mouth shut. I could feel the awkward tension coming out from those present at the table when he said that. After all, no one dared to say anything weird about the king, even if it was someone like Rambo. And the royal princess, Lilyhaven, was with them too…
“That reminds me, Maddie!” he kept on talking, “About the tournament I called, I think a lot of candidates will come this time! Hahahahahahaha!”
Honestly, I didn’t like this old guy’s laugh; it’s pretty annoying. I didn’t know if it was because we started on rough terms, or because he’s just an obnoxious man.
“Papa, I think we made it clear before that our big sister won’t partake in this foolishness?” it was Sophia who spoke up, though gently, “Our big sister is only here for a vacation and nothing else!”
“Yes, Papa!” Her Holiness reiterated her little sister’s point, “I’d like to put that matter aside for now; my duties as the Saint comes first.”
“Pah! Stop with your rubbish!” the Duke stubbornly countered, “You’re already at an age where you should marry someone of equal or greater stature! A wise, powerful husband would ensure the dominance of our house for generations to come!”
“No! Our big sister won’t marry!” William cried out, slamming his hands on the table.
“William!” the Human Saint was indignant, “Keep your table manners! And who said that you should decide for me?”
Yeah, brats, who told you to say ‘yes’ or ‘no’ for Her Holiness? Aren’t you meddling too much in her private affairs?
“Big sister!” Sophia countered, “Please focus on your duties as the Saint; we’ll take over from here.”
“If Maddie doesn’t get married, she’ll end up a holy spinster!” the Duke rebuked them all, “Do you want your big sister to end up a wretched old woman?”
The atmosphere around the main dining table was getting heavier the more they argued about their points. The others were getting awkward; I could see their ‘weirded-out’ looks being exchanged across the table. And I’m also was unnerved by what I was hearing…
I mean come on, it’s not like getting married was something that should be rushed. A lot of arranged or fast-tracked unions end up in unhappiness and psychologically damaged children; something that those very children themselves carry over to the next generation.
And worse, this tragic cycle continues…
I could tell that Her Holiness didn’t want this kind of talk. The more her father and siblings said anything, the angrier she gets. Honestly, I didn’t like being in here; it’s as if they would explode anytime…
“Ah, that reminds me, the second son of Duke Millshawn is good-looking and he’s starting his career in the Royal Guards Corps as well! When I invited him, he’s more than enthusiastic to join!”
Everyone, including me, almost jumped from our seats when we heard a loud crash coming from the Saint’s direction. She couldn’t take his words anymore and bang on the table. She’s fuming with anger now.
This is bad.
“Why are you so angry, my daughter?” the Duke asked in a flimsy, insensitive manner. It seemed the wine had already got into his head, “Are you trying to go against your father?”
“Big sister’s is right!” Sophia was quick to back her sister, “She won’t marry for now! Not until we’re old enough to discern her potential partner!”
“Enough of this! You’re always rambling about my marriage!” Her Holiness’ voice was quivering, her eyes looked like she’s about to cry, “Why can’t you guys just listen to a word I say?”
Fuck, this is bad.
Of course, no one wanted to end up in some strange pervert’s family. If you remember, that Millshawn guy was the one who tried to rob the panties of Her Holiness when I was summoned. Naturally, the Saint would get mad.
Damn, now I understand the hardships of those women from the earlier part of my world’s history, that ended up being the wife of someone they don’t know, or worse, someone they hate.
And another reason for my concern was, Her Holiness’ appearance right now was because of her magic disguise, which she needed to maintain constantly—and with conscious effort. The downside of such a spell was that the moment she gets distracted was the time that spell wore off. With her getting angry, of course, the disguise was disappearing.
Now everyone would see her true image!
I needed to distract them somehow.
Hey, Your Fluffy Holiness!
“…” Good lord, the disguise was about to come off!
Hey Holy Pug!
The Beastman Saint immediately glared at me.
Please tell Her Holiness that her magic is almost gone!
Her Fluffy Holiness then had a terrible expression on her face as she realized the severity of the situation. As she was sitting beside the Human Saint, she quickly tried to make her settle down, but it’s all in vain.
Damn it, I guess this calls for desperate measures!
Everyone’s eyes fell on me as the entire dining hall was filled with sounds of crashing plates and glasses.
“What are you doing, you insolent peasant?” the Duke roared in anger.
“Comfort room, Your Excellency!” I replied, “I need to take a dump!”
I guess it’s one of the most embarrassing stunts I did in my entire life. But at least that dispelled the tension that was simmering inside that dining hall. The partially drunk guests, as well as the equally drunk hosts, finished their meal, chuckling at me.
I could only sigh as I went around the private space that was given to me. After that event, everyone had retreated to their rooms, while a servant of the Duke’s household led me to a rather simple cottage outside the manor.
They didn’t like me in there. Well, it’s not like I want to stay there too, either…
I couldn’t help but feel bad about myself. If Her Holiness knew about her father’s contempt for commoners like me, then why did she ask me to come along? It’s like she threw me right into the lion’s mouth to be devoured.
My train of thoughts was interrupted when I heard a soft knock coming from my door. I quickly got up from my bed and welcomed my unexpected visitor…
“Y-Your Holiness!?” I couldn’t help but be surprised by the guest I had in this hour, “And Lily?”
The Human Saint was at my door together with her trusted maid. She had shed her disguise for a moment, possibly because she had to rest and recover her mana for a while. They were all wearing coats to hide their identities from those who might come across them.
“And I’m here as well, Master!” it was Her Fluffy Holiness.
Oh, it’s the holy pug, too!
“Can we come inside, Kuro?” the Human Saint asked, though I could tell that she was embarrassed.
“Oh, sure!” I opened the door further and checked if there’s anyone outside who might’ve seen them enter my place. Luckily, there’s none.
“I’m surprised not because you visited me, but by actually walking out to come here.” I told them my private thoughts, “You could’ve just teleported on your way here like you always do back in the palatial gardens.”
“I won’t do that.” Her Holiness said, “At least, not here. Not only because I wanted to do some exercise, but I also don’t want your privacy violated.”
Heh, for someone who keeps on reading my mind, it’s a first that you put my privacy first.
“Hey, I said it’s only here.”
Anyway, after asking the Saints to stop reading my mind for a moment, I questioned Her Holiness for the reason for her sudden visit. I’m sure that if her father, or her siblings, gets wind of this, I’ll be losing my head.
“I’m sorry for bringing you here, Kuro.” the Saint bowed her head, “You see, I know my father hates commoners, but I also thought that I could protect you from him, that’s why I even had Ruro come with me. Turns out, I gravely miscalculated his intentions.”
“It’s fine, Your Holiness.” I tried consoling her; it’s not like we could do something for what happened to me earlier. And I didn’t want to bring up the primary reason the Duke had me imprisoned as well…
“Kuro, come on! I’m being serious, please look at me for a while and not at my beautiful breasts!”
Ah, sorry! It’s not because I wanted to stare at them; I just remembered something awful…
“You see, I’d like to thank you for what you did earlier.”
“Hmm? What are you talking about?” Well, I’m already aware of what she’s thanking me for, but I still pretended I didn’t know the reason to discuss.
“Well, it’s difficult for someone to embarrass themselves like what you did. I know you did that for me.”
“Uh…you’re welcome as usual, Your Holiness.” Man, getting appreciated like that sure felt good; it made my heavy feelings lighter, even if it’s just for a little. “But you know, you also protected me when I almost got mad because your father insulted my way of eating.”
“No, please.” Maddie insisted, even trying to bow before me. We prevented her, of course, but she continued her words. “What you gave is much greater than what I did. For that I thank you.”
“Ah yes, gratitude accepted. But you have to accept my gratitude as well…”
“Yes, I accept, but I want to thank you more—”
“You know…” it was the Beastman Saint, “I think you two should stop throwing gratitude to one another, and get on with your topic. You look and sound stupid, both of you.”
Well, Her Fluffy Holiness has her point.
“Haa…” I could feel the Saint’s exhaustion with the way she sighed. She reeked of sadness, and her eyes were tearing up.
So, even though it’s quite embarrassing for me, I summoned all my courage and patted the Saint on her head, “Ah, don’t worry Your Holiness, we’ll get through this somehow. I understand what you’re going through right now; you see, I have an overprotective mother back in my old world, and she’s almost the same as your father.”
“Yep. She always tells me to be home at a certain time of the day, and that’s non-negotiable. If I don’t do it, she’ll keep on calling me on my phone—a communication device in my world—and by the time I’d seen it, it’s peppered with around 100 of her missed calls. That’s the moment that I knew I fucked up.”
Her Holiness laughed softly through her tears. I asked Lily for a handkerchief and wiped her eyes with that. Then I continued with my story, “And if I get myself in a fight when I was a kid, she’ll come barging into our counselor’s office demanding justice to what was done to me.” I laughed in nostalgia, “Heck, my mum is so protective of me and my siblings that she always reminded us to get girlfriends only when we’re old enough to pay for our daily needs!”
I heard the other ladies chuckled when they learned that.
“Well, you know, sometimes our folks back at home may be obnoxious…but in the end, all that they want is what they think is best for us. Although, sometimes, what they think would be good for us could lead us to ruin instead.” I explained, trying to lighten the mood with some reflections.
“I understand your point…” Her Holiness smiled softly, “You see, our family is tightly-knit, held together by my father and my mother. We’re a typical noble family, with father doing the work at the capital, and my mother was concerned with the affairs of our fief most of the time.”
“We lived happily before, you know…our subjects, though they were going through tough times, loved and respected us as well. That is until my mother suddenly fell ill.”
Uhh…for some reason, I felt like there’s going to be a big turnaround in Her Holiness’ story. Well, isn’t that the case? In most animes that I watched, if not both parents, it’s always the mother who gets the death sentence. The father was an absent figure, rarely showing up. And if they appeared, it was only to bring problems to the hapless male protagonist in the form of absurd conditions, or anthropomorphic stuff like cat-girls…
And when we didn’t see their mother earlier raises my gut feelings more…
“My mother died when we’re still young…”
See? Their mother was already dead, again. Tch. I hope the author of this stupid story will give justice to all anime mothers out there who only wanted to love their dense kids…
Wait, this isn’t an anime though.
Ah, anyway, I needed to listen to Her Holiness’ story…
“…our father was utterly devastated, and I and my siblings were overcome with grief. Our home was never the same again. The royal doctors from the capital diagnosed that her sickness was from a curse which may have come from her daily dealings with the common folk of our place.”
“My father became embittered towards the commoners after that, and my siblings were affected by his anger as well. So, you know, I knew I had to do something! Then I remembered that Papa always used to say that I’m in the likeness of my Mama, so I tried my best in being the ‘mother’ to Sophia and William. That’s why they’re that close to me.”
Oh, so that’s why the old guy is like that to commoners. Even so, that won’t explain your father’s attitude towards you…
“Ah, Papa? Well, though he doesn’t want to, he has to make me stay far from home that much, since you know he’s averted to big chest sizes. That’s why he wants me to marry as soon as possible to a dependable and responsible man, so he can rest assured that I’m well taken care of.”
“Papa says that the only thing that I don’t take from Mama is my big chest.”
I guess it just ruined my bittersweet and sentimental mood. Man, that Jimmy Nee ancestor of hers sure had a long-lasting idiotic legacy to their house…
I could tell that Her Holiness, Lily, and the Beastman Saint wanted to loiter around my cottage for a bit more time. I thought that they may have been feeling comfortable here since this cottage had that ‘home-y’ feel to it.
Well, it’s not that I never enjoyed being in the company of beautiful ladies; but I guess it wasn’t good to be seen around a guy at this hour of the ‘day’. I mean, they’re all marriageable women, and someone who might come across us could take the wrong idea.
And our silence can even reinforce such misunderstanding…
“Why don’t we return to the Holy Palatial Gardens, then?” I brought out another topic; maybe if the opportunity permitted it, I’d suggest that they leave for their rooms as soon as possible, “If your ‘break’ is this stressful, I doubt it could be called a ‘break’ at all.”
“Well, we should if we could.” Lily was the one who answered my question, “To be honest, I wanted to rush over to the dungeon when I heard the Duke had you arrested, but Maddie and Miss Ruro stopped me. Anyway, we can’t return just yet.”
“It’s the Tri-Skill Tournament,” she replied.
“Seems like you know about it already, Mister Kuro?”
I almost said yes and explained to them where I got my knowledge, but then I remembered that Her Holiness’ siblings had asked me to keep silent about our conversation about it.
“I read about it from some books in the palatial library…”
“Oh, alright.” Lily smiled, “I really can’t beat you with knowledge, Mister Kuro. Anyway, you see, that tournament is an important tradition here in our kingdom, and canceling it for so sudden of a reason like Maddie went back to the Holy Palatial Gardens, would end up for her family’s political and financial destruction.”
“That’s quite heavy…”
“Yes. You see, our honor is something that we prioritize above everything else. If the Duke has to cancel the tournament, then the candidates’ honor would have to be satisfied to suffer the minimal repercussions of such an act.”
That…sucks. Honor this, honor that…
Well, I read once that living in the Middle Ages wasn’t a life of convenience. Peasants were tied to their lord’s land, born to till the soil up to the day they die. Nobles, though they live way better than the common folk, were not that privileged—especially the women. If they didn’t end up in some obscure monastery becoming a nun, most of them get married off by their families to make their house and domains stronger.
The knights too, though they were glorified as those guys in shining armor and carrying a sword and a lance, didn’t have it easy as well. For one, they always had to comply with their lord’s demands, no matter stupid it may seem. Plus, this chivalry and honor stuff…I mean, it’s not bad and all, but I also thought that too much adherence to it also brought a lot of problems during those times.
I heard Her Holiness sigh in resignation. I guess we also committed a big miscalculation thinking that her family could help her through her depression.
Now I can’t help but think that going here only made it much worse.
“Maddie, I think you should rest now.” Lily tapped her friend’s shoulder.
Her Holiness was surprised by that; but for some weird reason, she never averted her gaze from me. That made me felt so awkward, I remained speechless. But there’s something strange about Her Holiness’ stare. Those eyes, I’ve seen them before…those looks were the same as those of my students, who had been overwhelmed by problems though they would try to hide it from me so that they won’t feel they disturbed someone else.
Yep, she’s desperately pleading with me for help.
But what could I do? I’m just a powerless, ordinary human from Earth…
A few moments later, the Human Saint and Lily left for their quarters. I could only watch her from the window of my small cottage as she walked away sadly.
If only I can do something for her situation right now…
Well, now that I thought of it, Her Holiness’ problems right now were because of the frequent meddling of her family members. If only that Duke would understand that his daughter wanted to take control of her life and enjoy it for a while; and her siblings should also be told that their big sister needed to be left on her own since she could protect herself…
“Indeed, those are the reasons Maddie’s overcome with grief right now. I’m surprised that you can think of such things, Master Kuro.”
Oh yeah, I once again forgot that Her Fluffy Holiness is still with me.
“Don’t worry, I won’t tell Maddie of that agreement you had with her siblings.”
“I keep my promises, provided it gives me the entertainment I crave for!”
I felt something much more sinister with her statement, but what do I care? It’s not liked Her Fluffy Holiness hadn’t been helpful from before. I guess I could trust her, “Ah, anyway, what are you doing here? Aren’t you provided a room of your own back at the manor?”
“Well, I want to be always with my master.”
“You know, I appreciate your thoughts and that’s great; however, I was alone back in the dungeons though.”
“Would you like me, a Saint, to come and spend time there in the dungeon?”
“Of course, I didn’t think that it would inconvenience you. My apologies, Your Fluffy Holiness.” I was sarcastic when I said that, but I guess the Beastman Saint didn’t mind my intentions.
“Ah, so, Master, are you okay with how the things are going?”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean, what’s happening right now?”
“The tournament and Her Holiness’ family?”
“Is there anything else?”
“What do you want me to do?”
“I don’t know you much.” Her Fluffy Holiness’ smile was mischievous, “But I know Maddie; she’s desperately asking for help…though she also knew that you didn’t have the capability.”
“Precisely. I’m just an ordinary bloke from another world. If I was only given powers by the gods of this world, at least I can do something…”
“Well, didn’t that black Saint tell you what your abilities are?”
“Words are nothing in this situation.” I reiterated as I went back to lie down at the bed, “Do you think those stupid nobles would listen to what I say when I haven’t even proved myself?”
For a moment, I didn’t get what Her Fluffy Holiness’ stares meant. But she kept on looking at me as if she intended to pierce through my soul. And then I realized…
“I think you finally realized what you have to do”
“All I need is to prove myself, right?” I couldn’t keep my excitement that I almost shouted, “I forgot these nobles need some impression for them to be swayed into action!”
“Are you sure?” Her Fluffy Holiness had doubts in her voice, “I thought you realized how your head can be of great use in this situation…”
“That’s it! It’s a long shot, but if I succeed here, we can bail out Her Holiness from her predicament!”
“Ohh…” the Beastman’s eyes suddenly became full of life, “I like uphill fights! They’re chaotic and exciting! Tell me what’s your plan!”
“I’ll win the Tri-Skill Tournament, and when it happens, I’ll take Her Holiness’ hands in marriage!”