I’m Fallin’ Up; I’m Fallin’ Down

I’m pretty sure this is not a hallway.

Outside the door was much different than I expected. There were no floors or ceilings, only rooms layered upon rooms in a conical structure. They continued upwards, getting further away from their opposing counterpart. The downward ones grew ever closer before surrounding what looked to be a weirdly drawn circle and star. I could feel the pull of gravity towards the center rather than the ground, so there were still some spells at play that weren’t part of the ‘hallway’.

Hmm… yeah. Not dealing with that. Sure, it was my fault, but it was supposed to be a normal hallway! How would I know that it was… whatever this was? That demon leader of the Disciplinary Committee Niya should’ve said something. Even her annoying banter was better. Well, it wasn’t my problem anymore, so I made my way back inside the–

CLANK! Clang, clang, clan–

Huh? The bucket noise ball rolled underneath my foot, causing me to slip backwards. My head and shoulders passed through the doorway, dragging the rest of my body along. I didn’t have time to react before I fell towards the center of the cone.

…

…

…

Curse you freakin’ bucket ball!!! This was the fourth time! How the hell were they so effective at causing mischief? I take back my compliments, this sucks!!!!

…so, what now? I was being drawn towards the center in a sort of circular motion. It didn’t matter what direction, I was always dragged back into a wobbly orbit. It didn’t put a lot of pressure on my body, but the jerking motions were still uncomfortable. If I had eaten something, it surely would’ve flown out. Actually, I should be glad that healing potions weren’t really drinks at all.

Plop. “Tweeeeeeeeeeet. Tweeeet, tweet, tweeeeeeeeeeet. Tweeeet, tweet…”

A weight pulled my arm back as elevator music started to play from the hanging pumpkin. Yeah, what? I checked over the pumpkins contents again. First there was the fruit punch from the currently-out-of-commission Drama Club. Next the questionably white potion that glowed for some reason. Then there were two items I hadn’t seen before. Where and when did they get there? I had no idea.

One was what looked like a cassette player. ‘Looked like’ as there was no place to put a tape. Plus, the box only had one button, which was already pressed in. I had no way to turn it off.

The other was a familiar looking ball…

I immediately grabbed and chucked it into oblivion. The school had a funny sense of humor if it thought I would accept such an aggravating magic tool as a ‘treat’. At least this would finally–

Plop. CLANK! Clang, clang, clan–

…ARRRRGGGH! $%&@@$%&@$%!!!!!! Of course it somehow landed back in the pumpkin. Sure, I understood that the ball was also in orbit, and I was the only other thing here, but still…

“Haah…” I let out a sigh in annoyance. Pushing the thought out of my mind, I directed my focus towards escaping.

I knew I had to remove the gravity spell, but any direction but down marked certain death. Then there was the timing – it needed to be right as I was pulled back towards the center; otherwise, the momentum would flatten me like a pancake. The rest was simply a waiting game; I had no method to choose where I flew.

I guess elevator music does make sense then.

After about ten minutes and going a touch insane from the repetitive noise, my trajectory rocketed me towards the ground. I would still be falling from a story up, but it was the best option. Who knew when my next opportunity would be? I had to take it.

“Urgh!” The strain on my body increased as it lurched back from the opposing force. Now or never!

“Dispel the gravity spell [Disenchant]!” The upward pull suddenly disappeared, leaving me in a state of suspension. The next moment, I fell, bracing my body for impact.

My right side took the initial brunt as I landed on the walls of the bottom layer, rolling towards the center, unable to stop. Trying to land in a classroom was a no-go. Only the doorknob was jutting out, and that was too small to catch myself on.

Eventually, my body ramped off the last wall. I reflexively closed my eyes as the ground quickly approached.

Poomp!  “Argh…” Well, I was alive. My body was sore, and my shoulder was probably dislocated, but I was alive–

“Do we know what happened to the teleportation pathways yet?!?”

“No, but the gravity axis has disappeared too!”

“My right eye is beginning to tingle. This must be the work of the Demon’s Right Hand!”

“But he should be guarding the Demon Leader in her fortress! It must be some other hidden organization.”

Over-the-top voices yelled across the opening as I slowly opened my eyes. I found myself atop the strange star-inscribed circle, but there was nobody else in the vicinity. Was I imagining things? Please tell me I’m imagining things.

“Fellow comrades! Someone has infiltrated the Holy Site! Prepare for an encounter!” At once, students started teleporting around me. They all wore some kind of gothic clothing and makeup, but that wasn’t important. Bandaged arms and legs, eye patches with weird images, stupid looking poses – it was my worst nightmare: chunibyos.

“It’s the Demon’s Right Hand!” one of them yelled, crossing their arms in what could only be described as a choice.

“Anti-magic spells at the ready! We will finally seal him once and for all in the name of the Magic Research Club!”

…kill me now.