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Jul 17, 2024
I like the story so far.
Jun 29, 2024
It was a good ending, fleshing out the character of the king. 👍
I guess it should have been longer. One day, this idea might get a film since the concept was really good, but I think it lacks proper execution.
I didn't understand a single thing but the explanation was cool. xD
This could have been a whole ass novel. Pete and the talking letter are the best characters so far. Mom and Dad are well-written.
You might want to learn to improve your prose and setting the scene.
Jun 28, 2024
ok, that was interesting, but the story is too rushed. Thalia does not have a character development; the King is a better character but feels too blend. You should add subtext to your writing.
