Dec 21, 2024
I think the chapter struggles with focus and pacing. While the camaraderie between characters adds some charm, the humor often feels forced, and the world-building gets bogged down in unnecessary details, like robotic arms dressing characters.
Arwain’s reflections on his past lack emotional depth, and the quirky side characters, while energetic, distract from the main narrative. On the positive side, the futuristic setting is visually engaging, and the dynamic relationships hint at potential for meaningful character development. However, sharper dialogue and a clearer narrative purpose are needed to fully engage the reader.
Still, I think it’s not bad for an amateur novel. I’ll keep reading.
