May 03, 2025
I really loved this story! I'm a big fan of suspense and mystery, and you delivered both so well—it kept me hooked. I also want to say how much you've improved in showing rather than telling. I'm genuinely impressed!
One small suggestion: since quite a few characters are introduced at once, a little more description for each one could help readers connect with them more easily. It would also make it clearer who’s who, especially when it comes to gender, as I found myself paying close attention to the pronouns to figure that out.
That said, it didn’t take away from the story’s impact at all—it was still very engaging, and I think I’m going to stick with it. Keep up the amazing work!
