Oct 10, 2026
To:Slow
First of all I have to say I love seeing this much text in one of my chapters (this was a great time for it, since it pretty much marks the end of the arc).
On the lack of setup. I agree. This is another one of the maybe strange ordering choices, in the next chapter, and the rest of the book, it shows how these songs come to be. In a way it's meant to be surprising in the same way it is for Cro, since it's Ui doing something impulsive (which I hope it's shown that she is, at this point).
But that doesn't mean it couldn't use some setup, or more creative and interesting use of her powers. In a way they're hinted at, cheerful songs that mark the change of seasons, or that soothe the souls of the dead, at least in their belief system. But there's a LOT of missed opportunities to show that even in daily life or socialization in that long stretch in the city where there's really no pressure on her.
As for the Udari Uman divide. I chose to keep it subtle because in my mind it's a lot more painful. The Umans aren't exactly violent or overtly discriminatory, that's not how things work in reality, they simply don't invite them to their parties or to be a part of nobility in any way. In a way, living in the city, pretending to be a Uman, prevents Ui from experiencing any of it, and Odoe is likely used to it. There's very subtle hints around, but I think it was another case of over trusting readers with too small pieces of information. I think it would benefit from clarity, even people just frowning at Odoe in town.
Most of the point arc was showing how some nobles like the Duke are trying to change things, and shut it down. But even then, that one noble really pained Ui, and she starts thinking letting things go their course is not enough.
So here, when she sees the servitude, even if the baroness and husband seem like alright people, they still have servants, they're basically lost in her mind. She also can't stand because in her eyes the nobles of the north are all complicit in the divide. And once she meets Fahbe, she just can't stand it at all. This is what the Cro conversation is about, he illustrates your point that maybe they could try to talk it out, but Ui has been building up this unpleasant feeling that forced her to do something.
If it feels illogical or that she's making a mistake, that's what I tried to do. Even Cro, the person she trusts the most, isn't able to stop her. She just doesn't believe something like gathering everyone and talking will work, and in her letter she seems desperate to want to do something. Even if it's risky, or could be a mistake.
Of course, all of this is pointless if it isn't well reflected in the text, so all of these notes are great.
Thank you so much 🤩 I wish we could've shared these chapters sooner.
