Daily Life of a loner
As I was thinking this kind of stuff, a boy wearing our school uniform came to our class.
He had an athletic body with average height and was giving out "cool boy" vibes. He was carrying his school bag on his shoulders. When the teacher noticed him, she asked him to come inside. Confirming something from him, she said while bringing the boy inside the class.
"He is a transfer student and he will be joining you all from today .so take care of him."
Transfer student that makes sense. That is why he came a week late. The teacher gave him a signal to introduce himself. It was like he was waiting for it, without any second delay he started introducing himself.
"My name is Aki Yamada, I transferred here from Holy saint public school in Rajpura. I like to watch and play football. Nice to meet everyone here"
He completed his introduction. His voice was very calm and mature. It was like he knew what he was doing. I don't know what the reason was maybe his looks, his athletic body, or his mature nature, everyone was listening to him without any expectation.
As I don't talk to anyone. I usually sit alone, so by default he had to sit with me. He came and sat with me without any second thought and didn't speak a single word after that.
It was lunchtime, as usual, the class in charge was in class. Everyone was enjoying their lunch with their friends, except us of course. we don't have friends. I felt bad for him, so I gave him a bit of advice.
He turned towards me after hearing my voice and looked to continue. I continued.
"If you want you can change your seat too, it's not like they are permanent for everyone ."
'No reply, I see.' I finished and started eating my lunch again. He too started eating his lunch. After we both finished our lunch, we sat idly and were spacing out. A girl with short black hair came inside the class, she was probably my classmate. She gave us a look as she has noticed something.
"Both 'silent boys' are sitting together!....hehe.."She gave smile towards us.
She wasn't saying it in anyone particular, but to the whole class to notice it. What are we? animals in the zoo? Why the hell is she making this statement? We both gave a troubled smile to her and she went back to her seat. From the look of her face, she looked a little disappointed. Now that I have noticed it, her seat was just next to ours. we were the centre of attention of the class after that statement. I don't know about him but I don't like to be the centre of attention. So I tried to ignore their stares that were directed toward us. After that people started murmuring with each other.
"Why are you not speaking with anyone?"I asked Yamada
"I don't have friends.....yet" that was his reply.
"Why don't you speak with anyone? " he asked the same question to me.
"Same," I said
That was the end of our conversation. That was my first conversation with him and anyone in this class. I wanted at least someone to be my friend. God allowed me to befriend him. How could I let it go to waste?
Every day, I come up with something to start the conversation and it continued without any trouble after that. I had fun talking with him. He too looked like enjoying it. We started to stick together more often. He doesn't only looked athletic but was indeed athletic. On the other hand, I had an average physique. So During P.E., in every game, he was the leading player among everyone. Time passed very peacefully. Days passed and we started talking little by little. It was the point that from others perspectives we were friends. Were we? We were only together because we didn't have any choice. We stood together to support each other. But that's what friends are supposed to do, support each other. So cant we say we are friends now? I can't say our bond was of friendship. I knew he will stay with me until he finds new friends. But I don't wanna think about it, I don't wanna accept it. I don't want it to be true. In short, I was running away from the truth. Despite knowing everything I let myself think that we were friends. I think he was having the same feelings. At least that's what I think.
It was already 2 weeks since Yamada came to our class. He was good in study, had decent looks, cold at the same time friendly attitude, even good in sports. All qualities that make him qualify to be a noble. I guess everyone noticed it. That was the reason why everyone started talking to him. I knew our time sitting together was limited now. But I was satisfied. In times of hardship, I felt relief due to him even for some time. I was satisfied with that. Now, it was time to say goodbye.
It was a normal day of class. I came to class at the usual time, few minutes before the class start. I sat in my seat and Yamada was sitting next to me. Everything was normal.
"Yamada" someone called his name. We turned around to look whose Voice it was. It was 'Jun Fujiyama '.Yamada was watching him, asking him to continue.
" Why don't you sit with us?" I knew it would happen eventually. I was preparing for it for some time now. Yamada shot a look towards me for a short moment and returned his gaze towards Jun again. It was a hard decision to make. So I gave him little help to make his decision.
" If you wanna sit with them, go sit with them. Haven't I said earlier if you wanna change seats you can, they are not permanent? " I spoke with a low tone so that only Yamada would listen to it.
" Sure, Why not !?" Said Yamada to Jun and smiled at him. Jun looked satisfied and said.
" Come over there then " saying this he left. After he left, Yamada asked me
" Is it ok with you ?"
"don't worry about me......"
That's what I said. But it hurts. Even I was preparing for it. I knew it would happen. Still ...... still it hurts. That was the day when I decided to walk on the path of a loner. It was my first step towards it. I decided to never consider anyone my friend. Because it hurts a lot when they leave and I don't wanna feel this pain again.
From that day, Yamada started sitting with them. Now he was part of nobles. Now we don't have anything to do with each other. I returned how I used to be. No there was a difference. now I wasn't seating alone. If Yamada wanna sit with them, someone has to give his seat to him. That's what happened to the person sitting next to me. He was forced to give his seat to him. What was his name?
......Yes,' Paki youtskei' his height was small, with a skinny white face. Anyone can mistake him with a small child. And, yes, he was a member of outcasts too. Since Yamada left, one question still lingers in my mind. Was he my friend or not?