The Last Night Home

"Gwnnmuthhrr, dish ish delihshhh--munch munch..."

"Ha! Eat your fill, brat! You're not gonna get a taste of this for a loooong time!" 

I felt like crying. I really couldn't imagine living without Grandmother's cooking for years. For a moment, I even thought probably this was worse than not being able to stay at Brother's side for a while.

"I sure hope you won't talk while chewing once you live in the dorm, Sesil," Brother Arcis told me off with a smile.

"Nah, I doubt the food at the Academy would be this good," I spoke after swallowing everything in my mouth.

"Oh, tush! You always say that about something new, but you always get so fired up in the end ."

"Ouch!"

Grandmother flicked my forehead as she spoke.

"Have you gotten everything ready?" Brother asked.

"...Ehh, well, it's not like I've got much to bring."

"Just remember that we can't send your stuff all the way to your school," Grandmother added, "But we don't really need to worry about the little things on dinner table, do we? Here, eat some more."

"Thank youuuu! Munch... munch..."

After the meal, Grandmother actually stayed with me while I cleaned up. She even told Brother to leave us. That was rare.

"You're really going to school, heh," she said as she watched me doing the dishes from the table.

"You and Brother made me."

"It is not wise to lock your path so early, brat," Grandmother replied, "Of course, Arcis was dead set against you succeeding us, but the decision's on me. If I'm still alive when you're back, that's it."

I stopped.

"Will you let me be a priestess, Grandmother?"

"Ha ha ha! I know you already have the gift. Your a hundred years too early to fool me."

"...I know. Anyway, back to my question! Will you--"

"No."

"But--"

"Arcis worries too much, but he's not wrong. I would be foolish to promise you anything."

"I know I can do it, Grandmother--"

"Go to school, then we'll talk. Anyway, I'm warning you not to use that gift too much. The common folks call it a curse for a reason."

I knew it. It always came down to it. The "curse".

"You won't be much use for Arcis if you can't see," Grandmother smirked as she spoke as if knowing how to strike me where it hurt the most. Of course she knew.

"I know you like dead people more than living ones, but the people you meet at the Royal Academy won't be the same. I don't care if you don't get along with them anyway, but don't run off to the spirit plane so much, you hear me?"

"...Okay."

"Good."

Grandmother stood up and walked towards me, then she gave me whack on the head, "Ouch!"

"Well, with a tough head like this, you'll be fine."

"Grandmother!"

Grandmother always treated me like a little kid, but that whack of hers had always felt reassuring. It's not hard enough to hurt, but nobody did that to someone they didn't care about.

"Well, I'll leave you to finish your one last chore at this house."

Before she could walk away, I hugged her, soap and all.

---

When I returned to my room, Brother Arcis was already there.

"I wish I could help you pack."

"Oh, come on, Brother! It's not like I can't do it myself," I complained as I grabbed the scattered clothes and tossed them into an open trunk, "I'd miss you so much, but I wouldn't miss you being so fussy."

"Ahaha, you grow up too fast."

"Well, aren't you the one who wanted me to grow up fast and leave as soon as possible," I stopped and pouted to Brother's face even though he couldn't see it.

"I'm sorry, Sesil, this is for your sake too," Brother said with a resigned smile, "Come, sit with me for a bit."

"...Okay."I sat down on the mat in front of Brother. I couldn't help thinking he's making a big deal out of me going to school. Now he must be trying to give me a lecture...

"I wish I could promise you that you'd love your new life at the Royal Academy," Brother started speaking.He really said it. A new life. I didn't like the sound of that. Now it would be hard for me to convince myself that I was just leaving for on a short vacation.

"...But I can promise you that you'd be glad knowing what it's like out there instead of never knowing at all. After all--"

"Misery befalls those who are blind of mind," I cut in and we ended up saying that line together. I'd had those words drilled into my head for years now. I couldn't even count how many times Grandmother made me rewrite those words for hours as punishment or to pass the time when she felt like playing hooky.

"Smart girl. Now, I bet you know what I'm going to say next, don't you?"

"The truth is never as simple as it looks?"

"Yes."

"You keep saying those things over than over. There's no way I could forget."

"Well, even if you always remember them, tomorrow will be the first time you really get to put it to practice, don't you think?" Brother smiled, "Aren't you excited?"

"I'd be lying if I said no, but... I don't know, Brother," I turned around and lowered my head, "Just... Please tell me I can come back."

"Why, there's no point for us sending you all the way to the Royal Academy if you give up so soon, don't you think?"

"Of course not! I don't mean I'd want to come back right away, but someday... Maybe when I graduate. Or when I'm on holiday! That's what I mean!"

To have a home to return to...

"You know the likeliness of this place still standing half a month later is just as low as us being able to wake up after we sank into death-like slumber," that was Brother's reply, "But if it was possible, know that would welcome you with open arms."

I had to be content with that half-assed answer and a pat on the head.I took care of the rest of my luggage before lying down, half-hoping tomorrow would not come to soon. I also repeated the last thing Brother said before he left over and over like one sacred mantra.

"You'll see this through, Sesil. You'll be fine."