Desperation

 It was the morning of the next day. I was currently preparing lunch for Mr Morales.

He told me that I could choose any recipe from the booklet, so I always choose the easiest ones. But no matter which recipe I chose, I always messed up. Mr Morales has never told me about the flaws, but I knew they were there. I always tried to improve, but I never could.

After some sleep, a disturbing wish entered my head — I didn’t want to leave. This wish was just wrong, so I had no idea why I had it. The reason had to be deeper than just the fact that this place was nicer than anywhere else I stayed.

This was why I did not like being bored — it leaves me alone with my thoughts. And my thoughts can lead me to do crazy things. I always strove for the skill of suppressing my feelings, but I could never achieve it. This time, my inability was causing more trouble. I understood that leaving was my best course of action, but something within me was resisting. Fine, I’ll try harder, but if nothing changes, I’ll leave.

Ren’s POV:

And so, another day at work was upon me. I stood at the door with my shoes on and turned.

“Camryn, I have to go somewhere after work, so I will be back a bit later.”

“I see… That’s fine, I’ll prepare dinner later than usual.”

I nodded my head in approval. Honestly, her cooking is not as great as mine, but it is fine. Unless the meal is ruined to the extent where it is inedible, I will eat it.

“Okay, goodbye.”

“Mr Morales, please wait.”

“Yes?”

“U-um…”

I looked at her with a curious expression on my face — or I at least looked that way according to my standards. What does she need? Well, she knows that I have work, so she will most likely not ask a question that requires a long explanation. I am fine with a complicated question right now — I would not be penalized if I came into work a couple of minutes late, but she probably does not know that. Then what? Maybe about the lunch she prepared for me?

Camryn was standing in front of me. Her head was looking down and I could hear her slightly heavy breathing. Her fingers were curled up, her knees were together and her ankles were apart, and her legs were shaking. There was not a lot, but I could also see small droplets of sweat form and roll down her face.

I was even more puzzled. From what I could see, she looked angry? If so, then why? After further examination, I realized that she… I think she was scared. I did not know why, but that was just how it looked to me. It was as if Camryn was bracing for something. I was confused. Why was she scared? Is it me? Maybe she messed up something in the condo and is fearing the consequences. If so, she should not because I am not the type of person that gets mad. If this is the case, I should assure her.

“Camryn? If y-”

But I was interrupted when she let out a small yelp and moved.

She walked directly in front of me, but it was more of a light jog than a walk. She stood on her tiptoes and quickly wrapped her arms around my neck. She then lifted her face towards mine. And…

My eyes widened in confusion. She… was kissing me — directly on my lips.

What? Why was she kissing me? What would kissing me achieve? I was truly confused. I have seen couples do it before, but I have never known what effect doing so has. It is usually between couples, so is it related to love? Possibly, but I did not know. Anyway, it was… unsanitary; to have our mouths so close together would definitely spread bacteria. But I knew she did not have poor oral hygiene because she brushed her teeth with the same effective toothpaste I use.

As the kiss continued, Camryn’s grip on me hardened and she pushed herself a bit higher. I could hear her heartbeat at a rather quick pace. I could feel every exhale of air come out of her nose. Why was she doing this? It was like she was desperate. Was she trying to send a message? I... was truly confused.

After about a minute, Camryn slowly pushed me away, stepped back, and quickly turned away from me. I could see her shoulders rise and fall with every inhale and exhale, and I could slightly hear her heavy breathing; I think she was trying to hide it.

I tilted my head in confusion. I still did not understand what occurred. She kissed me, but why? I was unable to think of any merits that could arise from kissing me; I did not understand what a kiss was.

A moment of her silence passed when I finally spoke.

“Camryn? Do you need something?”

I think it was best for me to ignore the situation. I was uninterested, and I think it showed when I spoke. I have never experienced a kiss and I did not understand it, and Camryn’s kiss did not seem to affect me in any way. So, I do not think I should pursue an answer if it does not concern me. Besides, I was neither bothered nor pleased by the kiss.

Camryn took a few seconds to stop her heavy breathing. She slowly turned around and smiled at me.

“O-oh! I-it’s nothing. Just have a great day at work!”

She seemed a little disappointed by something, but that did not concern me.

I nodded.

“Thank you. Goodbye.”

And with that, I left my condo. This was definitely abnormal, but honestly, Camryn was an abnormal girl.