Balls that are Blued and Standoffs

Lucy opened her eyes. Death was like music. Sweet. Fleeting like her breath. Haunting. She stood in front of a dark door. She moved. It led her inside a room drowned by the swirling void, drawing her eyes into a large beating heart mumbling doki doki in the middle of it all. Death, she figured. She moved her feet, about to step forward. But the darkness quivered.

She stopped herself, for a being like her could not be controlled.

Yes. She grabbed Death by the balls and decided herself that it was not her time yet. She gave him the middle finger before fading into reality, to wake up in the arms of her dark night, steaming the rain that peppered the makeup on her face.

She gasped. Her heart raced, making her remember the heart in that dark room. It wanted something. It’s something that she could not understand just yet, but she smiled.

Her flesh burned with his warmth. The holes in her body were sealed by his flames. She worried, for a bit, that her hair was burning, too, but her knight’s flames only held up like she was slowly falling out of the sky. Sun. He’s bright. She couldn’t look at him for too long. Hot. But his blazing smile filled her chest with glee. Only her clothes were ruined.

Lucy touched Uncle’s cheek. She forced up a chuckle like a damsel, pulling up every energy in her body to appear helpless, like a princess begging to be saved. Like a weak animal breathing ever so faintly to be hot, being desirable to be preyed on, only to sink her teeth into her predator moments later. She traced his rough skin, chuckling at the touch of his scars and the ticklish sensation of his beard that would never grow. She let out a small laugh. She narrowed her eyes as her fingers rested on his chin, pinching it slightly—not forced, but strong enough to let him know what she’s doing. He’s gazing at her, too. She pulled herself close.

“You face Kayel… Senapati of the Buaya Tribe.”

And now they had to deal with this fucking cockblocking son-of-a-bitch-ass crocodile. Fuck. She was so close, but she had to say nothing as her knight in blazing armor helped her on her feet as his body whizzed by the rain. Damn. Fuck. She had no balls, but she felt so blue balled right now. Death, you son-of-a-bitch. She’s being cucked. The Sun. Death. The Wind. The Rain. Except for the cactus, everyone deserves to die.

“So it is a rank,” Enteng commented, stepping forward to join their group. “It’s a good measuring stick.”

“I just beat Rayan, so I can take him alone. But I’ll let you help me.” Uncle followed. He stretched his hand over to Joey, blasting his leg with a ball of flame, but that ungrateful bastard blocked it with a sheet of water.

“Piss off. I can heal on my own. I’m backed by the hottest goddess ever.”

Uncle scoffed. “Yeah, right. Mine burns me with his sheer presence.”

“Mine burns… parts of my body with her sheer presence.” Joey stuttered.

Lucy crossed her arms. She raised her brow. It’s fine. They could be insolent. It’s what made Joey fit to be a jester and Uncle cute. She didn’t have to worry about anything. But she wondered what they were talking about. A hot God. But she’s right here.

Lucy sighed. These filthy but cute unbelievers. They wouldn’t be able to do anything without her help. Even her efforts alone turned this fight for the better.

Jonathan came too, still bathing in his own aura as if it’s his only defining characteristic. He actually moved towards her without saying thanks for her efforts and… Lucy froze. What the fuck? What the fuck is this? The fuck was that? Was no one else seeing that?

She, Uncle’s queen, had just been held and held up on her feet while this big bastard of a strong man went past her and hugged her knight. Lucy ground her teeth. Hello, she’s still there. And no. She’s not gonna tell them to get a room.

She cleared her throat. She had to get this going. Kayel looked confused, and this joke should end now. She had to get them going. The last time they attacked uncoordinated, they got cheesed, and she had to grab Death by the balls. She might not be able to do it again. It might sound fun, but she didn’t want to risk it.

“I’m Lucy.” She started, stepping forward like a model, poising herself as she held up a finger. “I am the Queen that stands atop all humans.”

“Uncle,” he straightened his back and rested his hoe on his shoulder. “Fire Fist Uncle.”

“Enteng.”

The old man caught up with their group and stood in the middle of them. He brandished his bat and rested its bloodied tip on the ground like a holy sword. Cool. The others followed his lead and stood by his side.

“Joey.”

That poor noisy man finally picked himself up on his feet and slapped Jonathan’s bicep. He gave him a thumbs up. Joey tried to pinch his muscles, maybe testing for consistency, but Jonathan swatted his hand and turned to Kayel. He clenched his fists. His aura wavered for a moment, then it regained its smoky definition.

“I’m Jonathan.”

“Very well…” Kayel laughed and spread his arms. The wounds were gone. This cockblocking crocodile could heal himself, too. “I will remember your names. At least, you humans… have managed to put up a good fight. It’s worth noting.”

Enteng shook his head and laughed. Joey smirked. Uncle scoffed. Jonathan patted his shoulders. Lucy held up her middle finger. Uncle followed up and burned everything around him, healing everyone for good measure. He ignored Joey telling him off.

Everyone shared the same sentiment as though their minds have been linked for a moment.

“You’re not going to walk out of here alive.”

Joey stuttered, but everyone else ended up saying the same thing.