Diary of a Lost Wish
Maybe I already knew what my first wish was, or at least I think I have an idea of what it could be since yesterday, but I didn't want to accept it.
“Now we will see what your first wish is.” Pakya in my dreams will show me some fragments of the past.
“But I will find out by myself, as I said, I'm not sure if it's what I think.”
“Stop already, you're just avoiding it. It's time to know your first wish.”
I suddenly transport to my room in the past, I see myself sleeping. Everything is moving as if I'm watching a movie. I'm like a ghost, I can't interact with anything, I'm just a viewer.
My house and everything around it is common, it's so different compared to my actual world.
I see that I wake up and start the day as always. So far it's just a normal day, I'm just getting ready for school, I ate something and I leave my house.
On the way to school, my other me says hi to all my friends, then I go to school. This is so common, like my every day with some variations. Also, I haven't seen Pakya in this vision.
Now the vision moves forward, and I'm with Kanako, who starts talking to me, well with my past self, “I think I will travel with my brother tomorrow, I hope everything is fine because, since my dad's death, he's been acting weird.”
My past self asks her, “How different?”
Kanako looks worried, “well, he's a little—”
Suddenly her brother arrives and interrupts her, “Hi sis, hi Meiko. I'm going to buy some booze for tomorrow's trip, do you want to come with us, Meiko?.”
“No, thank you.” I think he's drunk.
“Mamoru, stop! I wanted to travel with you so you can distract, not because I wanted you to be drunk!” Kanako is pissed.
“But I will be distracted with some good old wine.”
They both continue arguing, and the scene moves forward. Now I'm in a hospital visiting someone, it's Kanako. I'm crying, and she won't wake up, apparently, she had an accident because her brother was driving drunk.
The doctor is saying that she won't walk anymore because of that. Her brother just got scratches.
The next days, I was with Kanako close to the riverbank, she was in a wheelchair, she hides her sadness with a smile, but she was crying.
Then she talks me, “I can't become an actress like this, I don't know what to do.”
I tried to calm her, “Maybe there's rehabilitation or something that could help you, don't worry.”
“You're right, I need to go on with this, I think I will walk again someday.”
I didn't know if it was the best I could say, but I felt in sorrow. I feel like the darkness was pulling me, and I couldn't escape.
Days passed and it was painful to see her like that, I might felt bad, but she was feeling worst, and she always hide her pain with a smile.
One night I was in sorrow in my room, and suddenly I hear a voice, “Do you want to make a wish? Pakya~”
It was Pakya, then I say, “Yes, I want that Kanako could walk again.”
“If that's what you want, then it will become a reality! Pakya~”
After that, Pakya dances through the sky. Then when it comes back, Pakya explains to me every rule.
The next day, Kanako was walking, and no one, including me, noticed the change. Pakya is following me, and my version from the vision already knew what it was, and that I needed to make a daily wish as if Pakya had always been there.
Then my first wish was to help Kanako walk again. I'm crying, I can't believe Kanako got through something like that. But as Pakya said, I already suspected it was something related to her, to cure her in some way. I was just avoiding accepting the truth.
But the vision didn't stop there, the second day with Pakya I wished that every illness disappears but because I wanted to help people like Ms. Yukari, who had arthritis. Sadly I couldn't make people immortal so I decided that people below 60 can't get sick.
The next day I wished that b-chan, Kanako's teddy bear, could talk.
The vision moved forward, and each day I made a different wish, for example, my house changed, and the town looked more and more like how it looks now.
The days passed in the vision, and Kanako talks me worried, “Meiko my brother is being somewhat violent lately, he gets drunk every day. He tried to hit me one time when I told him to stop drinking.”
“He's been awful lately, I think I know how I will help you,” I tell her. That day I wished that no one can't get drunk.
Days passed, and I wished for Takeshi to be athletic, and that Richard the ape could talk. It seemed like Kanako's brother calmed down for some days.
I've seen everything like if they fast-forward a video. Every day is just calm and quiet.
Then one night, Kanako came to my home scared with some bruises, “I don't know why but my brother is so pissed. Maybe my mother told him something, then out of nowhere, he hit her. I tried to stop him, but he ended up hitting me.”
“Come here, I will help you,” then I put ice on her bruises.
Apparently, Kanako's brother was someone who gets violent for simple things, he's mentally unstable.
I couldn't tolerate it, so I wished that he moves abroad, maybe that way, Kanako and her mother won't be in danger.
The next day Kanako tells me, ”I can't stand the awful memories of my brother. I might sound crazy, but sometimes I felt that he might be watching us wanting to hurt us.”
Kanako was looking scared, and full of sadness. To stop her sorrow, I wished that she and everyone else forgets about her brother's existence. I don't think it was the best idea, but I did it anyway.
Then the vision ended, and I'm with Pakya on the dream again, and it starts to talk, “Meiko I know you already had an idea about your first wish, but I think this confirms it.”
I'm sad, “I know, I just didn't want to believe it was true. I had a theory that maybe my first wish was to save or heal Kanako in some way or saving her from her brother or something similar.”
“Yes, you were right, but you were avoiding it.”
“Of course I was! it was painful to think something so important might be my first wish, I wanted to think it was something else.”
“But no. Now you need to go back to the real world and make everything like it was before.”
“But if that happens, then Kanako and the other people I helped would return like they were before.”
“Yes, because every wish would be reverted.”
“I know, I also want to end the curse, but this is a hard choice.”
“I'm sure it is, but you need to think on yourself, Meiko.”
“Pakya, I think I will do my first wish, but not when I wake up, I will do it after some days when I'm ready. Also, I don't want that Kanako misses the summer festival, I want to see her happy one more time.”
“If that's your choice I can wait, I know is hard for you.”
“Thank you for understanding.”
I'm not sure of what to do, but I need to end the curse.
“By the way, where's Kanako's brother?” I'm curious about it.
Pakya responds like if it knows everything, “he's in another country, I think Mexico. He doesn't remember you or anyone here, but he's now a boxer.”
“I see, maybe that way, he will focus his anger on something else.”
Now that I know my first wish, I can end the curse, all of this will end soon, but sadly there are some consequences.
I suddenly wake up, and I'm in my room. Just in case I see Pakya and it can't speak.
I feel as sad as I was in the dream because of all the situations with Kanako, but I need to end the curse.