[Phantom Pain of Rousoku Himawari] The Day Loneliness Died

Yoko waited on a bench just outside of Kyoto Station, a massive, grey monolith of glass windows and crisscrossed metal barring. The station was so busy and massive that it almost resembled the entrance to an airport rather than a rail station. Busses and shuttles came to and from the station, spitting black fumes through their exhaust pipes as they carried dozens of people to their destinations.

Yoko couldn't believe she had dragged herself out of bed and arrived at the station with more than enough time to spare before Manami's arrival. She still couldn't believe she received the initial phone call that caused all of this. Still numb to the situation at hand, her mind wandered back into the past yet again.

Yoko got up for bed bright and early, brushed her teeth, got dressed, and marched over to school. It was her birthday, and nothing was going to stop her from enjoying it to the fullest. She stood in the center of a deluge of foot traffic in the halls of her school, handing out the birthday cards she had painstakingly made herself.

"Here you go!" Yoko sang, handing out cards to passing students. "Thank you very much! Hey, you, take this! Please accept this, thank you! Tell your sister too, she's really cool. Here, just for you!"

Yoko didn't realize that the last classmate she handed a card to was Osamu He folded his wavy, shoulder-length hair behind his ears as he stole a glance at the card, then turned his curious gaze to Yoko. "Oh, it's your birthday?"

"Yes..."

(Osamu. I remember not liking him very much back then. I thought he looked like a girl with his long hair, and he was almost creepily nice to everyone. Despite that, he didn't have many friends. He was a lot like me.)

"Wow, did you make these yourself?" Osamu asked in amazement. "I tried doing the same thing for my birthday once but I messed them up really badly. Nobody came to my birthday anyway."

"Huh? No one came? Why? It's not because you're a pervert or anything, right?" Yoko questioned.

(Oh the irony, right?)

"Of course not!" Osamu protested.

Yoko snickered. "Here, just take it. I'd be happy if even you showed up."

"You can count on it!" Osamu assured.

The school day came and then it went. As soon as the dismissal bell rang, Yoko ran over to the grocery store, spending her own money on the best cupcakes she could find. She rushed in and out so fast, the clerks didn't even have time to tell her to have a nice day. When she got home, her mother was still shut in her room. She hadn't even said happy birthday to her own daughter. Yoko nervously walked up to her door, knocking twice.

"Mom? I got some cupcakes if you want any."

"Not now, Yoko."

"Oh...okay." Yoko sighed. "I'm going to be having a few friends over today, so it might be kind of loud near my room. Just letting you know..."

Yoko handed out close to thirty cards back at the school, most of them her classmates. She didn't expect everyone to be able to make it, but if even a fraction of them showed up, she'd be happy. Daydreams of a small group of friends sitting around her dining table, singing her happy birthday and laughing as she struggled to blow out her candles filled her head. Of all days, this was her day, the only one she could claim as her own.

But as Yoko waited at the bottom of her staircase, not a single soul showed up to celebrate her existence in this world. She sunk her head into her lap, both saddened and tired from waiting. Not a single cupcake was eaten, nor a single plate filled, or any wishes made.

"I was so stupid. Why did I make everyone such nice cards? I should've just saved my time. Dad's not here, and Mom won't even come out of her room..."

Suddenly, the doorbell rang. Yoko rushed to the door and pulled it open. She couldn't believe her eyes. Only one person cared enough to show up to the most important day of Yoko's life. One young man sat on her front porch, bent over and panting as sweat dripped off of his forehead. It was Osamu Ashikaga.

"You really are a creep, showing up on a girl's doorstep sweaty and breathing like a rapist." Yoko said.

"Wha...what?!" Osamu recoiled. "I can't breathe...because...I ran all the way here..."

Yoko's eyes widened in shock. "What? You ran here?"

"Yeah! I missed the bus and my mom was busy, so I couldn't make it any other way. So, how's the party..."

Osamu looked up and saw that the house was empty and quiet. It was painfully apparent that despite Yoko's heartfelt efforts, no one bothered to come celebrate her birthday. One glance at Yoko's face told the whole story. He saw the embarrassment and sadness in her eyes. She had taken the extra time and effort to make her invites special, and it had all gone to waste. So, Osamu did what he would've wanted someone to do for him in that situation. He flashed a dumbfounded smile before facepalming himself and stomping the floor.

"You've got to be kidding! I missed the party?" Osamu cried. "Are all the snacks gone? Don't tell me all the snacks are gone, I'll never forgive myself!"

"No, stupid. I invited everyone but no one showed up." Yoko murmured, averting her gaze.

"All of those pretzels, cookies, and cupcakes, gone! Wait...there...there wasn't a party? No one showed up?"

"If you want to laugh at me, go ahead. It would be justified since I called you a pervert earlier."

"Of course I won't do that!"

"Why not?"

"Because I know how you feel." Osamu said. "Hey, I'm here, and there's no reason why we can't still celebrate, right? It just means more snacks for us!"

Osamu's smile, accompanied by the sunset looming behind him, served as two lights that shined on Yoko's heart. That was perhaps the first moment she realized that Osamu was special, that he may not have been the perfect guy, but he was the perfect guy for her.

(I think, if I could trace it back to a single moment, that was the first time I felt anything close to love for Osamu. And it was the moment I stopped having any sort of love for my mother.)
Snapping out of her trip to the past, Yoko shot up onto her feet as a flock of people flooded out of the station's gates. Her heart slamming against her ribs, Yoko scanned the faces of everyone in the crowd in search of her mother. The very last person to exit the train was a woman with wavy, strawberry-red hair like her own, stretching her arms up towards the sky. The woman slid her hands into the front pockets of her black leather jacket and looked around until she spotted Yoko. The woman's ocean-blue eyes met with Yoko and sparkled with joy. There was no mistaking it. It was Manami.

Yoko approached Manami, who stood frozen in awe. They had both planned to meet in advance, and yet neither could believe they were looking right at the other. It didn't take long for Manami to notice Yoko's baby bump either. There was so much to say, and yet, Manami had no idea where to begin. Sensing the awkwardness in the air, Yoko made the first move to break the ice.

"Hi." Yoko said.

"Hey there. Wow...You really did grow up. You're taller, more beautiful...and you're having a baby too?" Manami asked.

Yoko nodded. "Yeah, it's been a few months. I'm in my second trimester now. I have an ultrasound coming up soon, so we'll be able to see what our baby's doing in there."

"I can't believe that! Congratulations, Yoko. I'm so happy for you!"

"Thank you!" Yoko sang with a polite smile. "And what about you? You don't look too bad yourself.

Manami laughed. "Oh, were you expecting worse?"

"Yes, honestly."

"Brutally honest..." Manami sighed. "Well, it really is great to see you again, Yoko. This is pretty overwhelming! Let's get out of here and go some place more comfortable."

"Oh, yes. There's a yakitori place nearby. I'm sure you're hungry after the train ride. "

"Oh gosh, yes. It was miserable and uncomfortable. Yakitori sounds really good right now! The Kyoto air feels so good, too! It's good to be back."

Craving some chicken skewers, Yoko and Manami walked across the street to the yakitori restaurant. They picked outdoor seating beneath the green and white striped awning of the small restaurant, avoiding the cramped clutter and commotion indoors.

Sitting across from each other, Yoko and Manami ordered themselves heaping helpings of skewers, each one grilled over charcoal and sprinkled with chives. Manami's drink of choice was a bottle of dry stout, while Yoko washed her food down with apple juice.

"Whew! Kyoto beer is killer!" Manami cheered. "I really did miss this place. I almost forget why I even left. So, Yoko. Who's the father? You didn't get knocked up by some casual partner did you?"

"I'm much more decent than that, Mom." Yoko hissed, offended she'd even assume such a thing. "One of my old classmates is the father. Osamu Ashikaga."

Recognizing the name, Manami slammed her fist on the table and leaned forward with a beaming expression. "The Ashikaga kid?!"

"He's not a kid anymore. You should see him now. We've been married almost two years now."

"Wow, I'm surprised!"

"Are you honestly surprised your daughter isn't loose?"

"Well, I always imagined you'd be more like me. I was quite the wildflower. My first was at fifteen years old, and I was pregnant with you at nineteen. Thankfully though, your father was a good man, unlike all the others. He took good care of the both of us."

"Osamu is a good man too. He's protective and caring."

"That's good to hear. Where is he, anyway? Can I meet him sometime?"

"He's currently busy with a job, so it might take him a few days to get it sorted out. Hopefully you'll be able to see each other again."

Manami took another sip of her mug of beer. "Splendid. So then, Yoko, I must ask..."

Manami's eyes opened again, twinkling with a suspicious shine. "Have you had any trouble with the supernatural?"

Yoko put down her skewer, stunned that Manami knew about the strange people, beings, and events surrounding Kyoto. It was such an odd question to ask out of the blue. Yoko knew she couldn't have ever thought to ask if she didn't already know something about the supernatural.

"How did you..." Yoko stammered.

"Come on, why do you think you can know everything about everyone just from a kiss?" Manamki snickered. "The Akiyama family has been involved with gods and spirits for a long time. Kyoto especially has quite the history with the supernatural."

Yoko leaned over the table to whisper, as not to attract attention from the other patrons. "So then...where does the kiss come from?"

"Ah, you really want to know?"

Yoko nodded.

"Okay, dear." Manami exhaled, leaning back in her chair. "So, as you may know, the Akiyama family is a branch of the Takeda clan. They held a close relationship back during the days of the Onin War and thr subsequent Warring States era until they were annihilated by the Oda and Tokugawa clans. Well, except for us, of course. During that era, there were many mothers in the Akiyama family that lost their children to famine, hunger, and war. That grief and agony tainted their souls, and because exorcism wasn't as advanced as it is now, many of them fell into that agony and became Mu-onna. Women of Naught.

"Mu-onna?" Yoko repeated, the term sounding familiar to her.

"They're typically vengeful spirits, bitter from losing their own children. They extremely protective of other children, but they also try to absorb them. They're able to peer inside the souls of children and find information as they merge with them, as well. That's where the kiss comes from. It's from the Mu-onna in our bloodline and their soul-peering abilities. The kiss is a mutation of that ability that's been passed down in our family.

Yoko finally remembered where she had heard the term Mu-onna before. She heard it from Taeko when she revealed the story of how she traveled to the modern era and became the imposter Lucrezia. Taeko had explained that she lost her daughter prior to being captured by Bishamon, and the resulting grief initiated her transformation as a Mu-onna.

"Mom, I have a question. Do you know a girl named Taeko Akiyama?"

Yoko could tell by the jolt in Manami's posture that the name meant something to her. Manami leaned in and looked around, wary of saying the name out loud in public.

"Where did you hear that name?" Manami asked.

"I know her. Wait...how do you know her?"

Realizing they had a lot more to talk about then they initially thought, Manami chugged the rest of her beer and slammed the empty glass down on the table.

"I should be asking you that, Yoko.”