Chapter 10:

No! She Is Digging More Plot Holes!

Real Villain, Desu Wa!


A time traveler? Are you kidding me? Damian thought. No way! You can be faster or slower than 1 second per second, but you cannot go to the past or the future! Well, at least in the 21st century. Perhaps M Theory was booming afterward! Damian thought.

Then Damian asked, “What do you mean I died several times?”

Anastasia wore a gray suit with a white t-shirt this time. She also wore black, open circle stud earrings.

“That means your rebellion plan was dumb. It wasn’t flawless, you were just overconfident. This is the third timeline of my time travel,” Anastasia insulted Damian nonchalantly.

“Haaaa? Explain, b*tch.”

“In the first timeline of my time travel, Lexi, Number Four, and Gabe, Number Five, were patrolling that night. Then they heard a gunshot, and when they checked the city’s gate, they found a broken humanoid. There was no way a lifeless human officer would rebel and destroy the humanoid. So an outsider must have done it.”

Sh*t.

“When they were preparing to hunt the outsider, you and Bunny appeared. Moreover, you said something suspicious: that you were drunk, and you wore the officer’s uniform. Although Gabe proposed to interrogate you, Lexi concluded that you were somehow involved and dangerous, so she decided to execute you immediately. That was why Lexi bribed my manager to poison you, and my manager called me so I wouldn’t know that you died after you drank the tea. Then you died. That was your first death.”

What the hell, that loli didn’t bother to collect any evidence! What a brat, Damian was still confused, and he asked, “But there was nothing wrong with the tea.”

“Because I went to an earlier time and switched the tea. I also killed that incompetent manager and made a time bomb to divert Lexi and Gabe’s attention,” Anastasia said.

“Are you... Dent's daughter?”

“Correct. My full name is Anastasia Wolfman,” Anastasia answered. “Well, silver-haired people are rare in Kievan.”

“OMG!” Bunny exclaimed.

“Hold up. So I always went to MakDi in any timeline?” Damian asked.

“Without my interruption, people’s actions and natural events were the same in each timeline.”

“And you were always behind the cash register. What about the time paradox?” Damian asked and rubbed his forehead.

Bunny didn’t pay attention to the conversation and took two decks of cards from Hikari’s jacket. He then, of course, played the cards!

“There was no casual loop or consistency paradox because I just went into another timeline, which was equal to another world or another dimension. The existence of another world isn’t hard to believe if you believe that heaven or an afterlife exists, or if you believe in anime. So, I didn’t go to the past or the future, I just went to an earlier or later time. Perhaps, should I call myself, the Super Dimension Traveler?

Whenever I detected another me, I was programmed to leave and deactivate myself if it was necessary so I wouldn’t cause any confusion.

What about my original timeline? Other timelines were also affected if I altered the events in a particular timeline, so my original timeline wouldn’t be different from this timeline at this point. You could say that God didn’t watch multiple universes so the timelines would always be one,” Anastasia explained.

“Believe in anime”. Are you kidding me? Damian thought and laughed. “Another world? Time machine? Your time travel doesn’t make sense.”

“When you travel with an airplane, do you bother to think: how does the airplane work or make sense? How do you arrive in another place? How does another place or another continent exist? No, you don't bother. But 'you have safely arrived at another place' is what’s important.”

Alright, let’s just play along! Damian thought. “This is the third timeline of your time travel, right? Did I die in the second timeline?”

Anastasia replied: “Yes. Gabe, the Super Gentleman, did something to the highway pavement at the right time, so your car crashed. That was your second death.

So I went to an earlier time and just delayed his arrival. I paid an elderly grandmother to push a cart up a hill. As the Super Gentleman, of course, Gabe would help her. That was why Gabe was late, and you had the chance to deal with Lexi.”

Bunny laid the cards face down, and he flipped the card face up over each turn. So he played Matching Pairs!

“Then why did you leave your original timeline? Did I die in that timeline too? What is your purpose? Ma-masaka, you love me too?!” Damian asked.

Anastasia smiled, put her hands on her back, and looked at the sky. Then she said, “My original timeline was terrible. The world became black and white, perfect and imperfect adults. No entertainment, no festival. There were just robotic humans and wars. Hundreds of people die every day. My father started the Fifth World War and the Ultimates became known as the Super Despairs, excluding you, Hikari, and me.”

Wait, wait, wait, are we in the right story? Not in that “sore wa chigau yo” story? Are you Kiregiri-san?! Damian thought.

“I get the third pair!” Bunny exclaimed. Damian and Anastasia looked at Bunny briefly, then they looked away again.

“Cyborgs could retain their emotions with software so I easily hated that world and decided to change it. But despite the terrible world, there was also happiness in that timeline,” Anastasia curled up her lips and said, “You and I pomf pomf every day.”

WHAT THE F*CK IS “POMF POMF”? And “kimochi”?! Damian was shocked.

“I know everything about you and your sexual desires, Damian: the positions, the jobs, the times, the places, the clothes, the hairstyles, the manners, the moans, and even the insults.”

HOLD UP. Why didn’t I remember those super important things?!

Anastasia said: “In my original timeline, you didn’t have the motivation to change the world because of Hikari. You didn’t want to put her in a danger anymore. So in the first timeline of my time travel and afterward, I hacked and erased your memories after my father dumped you in that landfill. I also installed a tracking application on you and dumped some components around you.

The result: you did well. You killed my father and made Lexi disabled. As expected from the Super Creator and my strong ex-husband, you have prevented the Fifth World War, Damian. Congratulations."

“I have bad news for you. Now I don’t care about a world war and I don’t want Hikari to die,” Damian said and took Hikari’s Magical Surgery Card.

Anastasia glared at Damian.

Slash!

“AAARGH!” Anastasia screamed. Damian threw the card and cut Anastasia’s left arm.

“Anastasia, go to an earlier time and keep Hikari away from me!” Damian said.

“Hahahaha!” Anastasia laughed. “Why should I? You are mine and mine only.”

Oh, sh*t. A yandere? Damian thought.

Anastasia combed her hair, and then she snapped her right fingers.

***

Once again, with the desert as the time reference,

“I have bad news for you. Now I don’t care about a world war and I don’t want Hikari to die,” Damian said and took Hikari’s Magical Surgery Card.

Anastasia glared at Damian.

Damian threw the card, but Anastasia moved to the right and avoided the card easily.

What? Damian was confused. Then he shouted, “Bunny!”

Thud!

“ARGH!” Anastasia screamed because Bunny grabbed her left leg and thrust it with Bunny’s sharp fingernails.

Anastasia then just smiled and snapped her right fingers.

***

This was the third time, with the desert as the time reference,

Damian threw the card, but Anastasia moved to the right and avoided the card easily.

What? Damian was confused. Then he shouted, “Bunny!”

Bam!

Bunny tried to grab Anastasia’s left leg, but Anastasia had lifted her leg, and then she smashed Bunny’s hands with her left foot.

“Aaaaa. I screamed although I didn’t feel pain. I just imitated,” Bunny said.

Bang! Bang!

Anastasia took a gun from her jacket and shot Bunny’s head. She then shot Damian’s left arm so Damian couldn’t fight anymore: his left leg was paralyzed by Hikari’s card, and his arms were injured.

“Stay low for a while, Damian. You might not have to rebel again if General Xerxes isn’t a bad guy. Of course, I’m going to erase your memory about our encounter here so you won’t beg me to save Hikari,” Anastasia said.

“No! Wait!” Damian shouted as Anastasia threw her gun at Damian.

Bam!

***

How the hell did I get here? Damian thought. He woke up on a train at night. He was laying on the floor. Ms. Hikari died because of me, then… I cannot recall what happened next.

The train sound filled Damian’s mind for a while. Then he thought, I think, therefore I rebel. I value rationality and, in turn, humanity. Kant’s Categorical Imperative is naturally attractive to me: “So act as to treat humanity, whether in your own person or in another, always as an end and never as only a means”. This nation defied individual rationality and thus treated humans as a means, so I rebelled.

Damian was rolling on the floor. But the result? I killed my dear colleague and many people. I got hurt, and I failed. I hated myself. I felt bad. So, FORGET Kant, and now I EMBRACE Sartre’s existentialism: to be human is characterized by an existence that precedes its essence. Do people have to be rational? No! Humans don’t have any essence, which is their designed role, because I believe that God let humans be whatever they want.

So, SCREW RATIONALITY! I define myself, my essence, as a good citizen of Verdandi! Damian stood up and raised his hands. GO AWAY EMOTIONS! I will embrace emotional drugs, although it’s a stupid decision!

Huh? Why is the seat so high? Damian climbed the train seat and looked at the train window. The window reflected Damian’s unusual figure: it was robotic, and it had rabbit ears. Is this a horror movie? Why did I become like this in the end?

Damian took over Bunny’s body. He became Bunny.


(The First Revolution Arc: END. Next Arc: Riot!)

Hungry Sheep
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