Chapter 25:
Of Friends and Foam Cores
Sam closed her book and sighed, slumping back in her seat. To make up for the build day yesterday, she’d spent all of Sunday studying her brains out, and now she was exhausted.
She glanced out the window. It was already dark out, and Mary still wasn’t back yet. That brought a smile to her lips. She must be having a good time on her date.
With the room to herself and no more energy left for studying, Sam considered turning in early. Then her eyes fell on her sword, Black Rose, resting right against the wall beside its predecessor, begging to be picked up.
It was such an odd feeling. Sam had been so used to a separation between her time in her classroom, her bedroom, and Boffer Club. But now she had a piece of Boffer Club with her all the time. Her very own sword. As she held Black Rose, it began to sink in that this wasn’t just some flight of fancy. Boffer Club wasn’t just a way to kill some time on Fridays and switch up her workout, not anymore. She’d sunk twenty dollars into it now just because of how fun it was.
The room was smaller without Mary here, so Sam had the space to move around. She pushed the chairs apart to clear the floor, and began to practice. Just a few swings at first, to test the weight. She twirled it between her fingers as she remembered Carly’s footwork, and Mike’s as well. She tried moving the way they did, swinging and blocking imaginary opponents.
It wasn’t much, but it was something. Practice made perfect, after all, and if she wanted to catch up to everyone else, she needed to practice twice, no, three times as hard as they did.
It’s fine, she reassured herself. It’s just an hour or two of practice every night. That’s nothing. You’re getting worried for nothing.
Her phone ringing broke her concentration. She said her sword down as she checked the ID, wincing.
“…What, mom?”
“Now Samantha, what’s with that tone? Didn’t I tell you I’d be calling to check in?”
“You’ve been calling me for days,” she groaned. “I’m busy!”
“Well, if you’d picked up the first time, I wouldn’t have to keep at it, now would I? I was trying to reach you all day yesterday, what could have kept you so busy on a Saturday now that your exams are over?”
“Um… stuff…”
Her mother sighed on the other end of the line.
“You were sitting in your room studying again, weren’t you? I should have known… sweetheart, I know school is going to be expensive but you don’t have to-”
“No, mom, I wasn’t! For your information, I was hanging out with my friends yesterday, so that’s why I didn’t call you back!”
The minute the words left Sam’s mouth she regretted it. Her mom’s joyful gasp nearly shattered her eardrums.
“Really?! Sweetheart that’s great! I’m so glad to hear you’re getting out of the room more often! Hanging out with people, socializing, that’s wonderful! It’s like things are going back to normal!”
Sam winced again. “Please, mom, just stop…” She pleaded. That was the last thing she needed to think about right now.
“Well, sor-ry for being concerned about whether or not my only daughter was having a good time at college!” Josephine scoffed. “If you don’t call home once in a while, I’m just going to be stuck thinking the worst!”
“That’s... ugh.” Sam sighed in defeat. She didn’t want to worry her mother, but with someone like Josephine that the definition of a lost cause. “…Fine. What do you want to know? My grades are up, I’m eating right, I’m getting plenty of exercise-“
“Is your shoulder doing better?”
Another groan. “Yes, mom, it’s fine. I feel great. Is there anything else? I need to practice.”
Her mother fell silent. “…Practice? Practice what?”
Oh crap. Oh crap crap crap. This was NOT what she needed.
“Nothing, it’s nothing! Gotta go, bye! Love you mom!”
“Samantha don’t you dare hang up this-“
Sam flung her phone away like it was about to bite her. Shit. She hadn’t meant to let it slip like that. After everything that happened last year her mother would have a meltdown if she found out Sam had joined a club like Boffer Club.
Needless to say, the phone kept ringing. Sam paced around the room as she tried to figure out what to do.
It’s okay. It’s not so bad, right? I’ll just… I just need to show her how safe it is. Yeah, that’s it. It’s fine. I’ve been playing for weeks and nobody’s gotten hurt. It’ll be fine. Fine…
She rubbed her temples in frustration. This was going to be a pain…
With a sigh of resignation she picked her phone back up.
“Finally! You nearly scared me to death! What’s this about you practicing again?!”
“It’s not what you think mom, seriously. It’s just a club. That’s all.”
“…Oh. A club you said?”
“That’s right. You know, just me and some friends, hanging out together and having fun. You don’t need to worry.”
“So what, like a video game club or something?”
“...Not exactly.”
“An art club, then?”
“God no.”
“Well, don’t keep me waiting, what is it?”
Sam closed her eyes and braced for the worst.
“…Boffer Club.”
The silence in the air as her mom processed that information was agonizing.
“WHAT?!”
That… was a lot louder than she’d expected.
“Mom, it-“
“Are you in a SEX CLUB?! Is THAT the sort of thing you’ve been getting up to up there?!”
Sam nearly choked. “WHAT?! A SEX CLUB?! WHAT?! No, ew, what- why would you even think that?! Are you actually insane?!”
“Samantha Jones you tell me the truth right this instant young lady!”
“NO!”
“Don’t you lie to me! ‘Boffer’ as in ‘boffing’ am I wrong?! It’s just some of that hip slang, isn’t it? That might fool someone else’s parents but I’ve been around the block a few times, and I know what I’m-“
“MOM! I am NOT! IN! A SEX CLUB!” Sam shouted, pacing even more frantically. She froze.
Mary stared at her from the doorway, wide-eyed and open-mouthed. She slowly backed out into the hall and closed the door.
Great. That was going to be a whole other mess…
“Samantha-“
“It’s a game, mom!” Sam shouted over her. “That’s it! Just a game! We use foam swords and we hit each other with them! That’s IT!”
Compared to her mother thinking she was joining some weekly orgy, the truth suddenly didn’t seem that bad.
Josephine took a second to process that. “…Oh. I see.”
“Did you really think I would be joining a sex club, mom? ME?”
“W-Well, I don’t know! They say kids get more adventurous when they’re away from home for the first time, so I thought maybe-“
“MOM!”
Her mother sighed. “…You’re right. I’m sorry, Samantha, I overreacted.”
“Gee, really?”
“I just want to make sure that you’re safe up there, sweetheart… are you taking care of yourself? And remember, if you do think about… that sort of thing, then promise me you’ll take the proper precautions, okay?”
“I’m not joining any sex clubs!”
“Well, maybe not a sex club! But maybe if you get a boyfriend-“
“Have you ever seen me with a boy? Ever?”
“Sweetheart, girls can also be-“
“Nope! Not that either!”
Another sigh. Sam was starting to feel bad for how stressed out her mother must be feeling.
“Mom, I promise, I’m not going to… well…” The words “make a mistake” were on the tip of her tongue, but she couldn’t quite find the right way to say it.
Josephine’s relieved sigh took that pressure off her shoulders, though. “I know, god, do I know… you’re always so responsible, sometimes I find myself wondering just how you could be related to someone like me.”
“…Hey, come on mom. You’re not so bad.”
“Me? Oh, no, with the things I’ve done by the time I was your age…”
“I don’t care about that!” Sam exclaimed. “Mom, you think I don’t realize how hard it must have been? Taking care of me all this time, all by yourself? Of course I do! You’re amazing! I could never do something like that! You’re the most responsible person I know!”
“That’s… that’s wonderful of you to say,” Josephine sniffled. “Thank you, sweetheart…”
Sam couldn’t help but smile.
Her mother took a second to blow her nose. “…Now, what’s this about you getting into fights with weapons at school?”
...Ugh. So close.
“It’s nothing, mom, don’t worry about it.”
“Weapons? Are you doing anything dangerous? I can’t believe the school would allow such a-“
“Mom, I promise, it’s totally safe. There’s nothing to worry about. They’re foam weapons that can’t hurt anybody, and we’re very careful with them, okay?”
“But what about your shoulder? The doctor said-“
“I’m taking care of myself, mom, don’t worry. I’m not going to overdo it.”
“…Sorry, Samantha. I’m still not sure about this.”
“Mom, I promise-“
Josephine cut her off. “But… you sound like you’re enjoying yourself.”
“…Hah?”
“This is the happiest I’ve heard you in months,” she chuckled. “You sound so… animated! You haven’t been like this since… well, you know. Do you really like it that much?”
Sam nodded, wiping the tears out of her eyes. “Yeah, I really do.”
Josephine let out a long, resigned sigh. “Well… I did tell you before how much I trust you. And if I can trust you not to get pregnant, I suppose I can trust you with this.”
Gee, what a glowing star of approval. Sam could almost feel herself blushing, really.
“Thanks mom. I love you.”
“I love you too, sweetie. You have a good night. And don’t practice too hard!”
“I won’t mom.”
Sam tossed her phone onto the bed, smiling.
The smile quickly faded when she remembered what had happened a few minutes ago.
“Oh, god…” Sam stormed over to the door and opened it, dragging an embarrassed Mary back into the room.
“Um, Sam…”
Sam wasn’t going to let her say another word. She crossed her arms in front of her chest and glared at the flustered girl. “I don’t know what you think you heard, but I am not in a sex club.”
“…Yeah I think the whole floor knows by now.”
“We good?” She snapped.
Mary nodded obediently.
Sam sighed in relief, turning back to her bed when their phones both dinged. It was an email notification from Carly.
>Carly Davis
To: Boffer Club
Greetings, Boys and Ghouls!
Although Midterms may be behind us, fear yet still has seized our campus!
At 6 PM on Friday, October 29th, come to the Soccer Field dressed in your SCARIEST Halloween costume for a special Boffer Club event!
A night of fright and foam cores is upon us!
Mwahaha…
Sam’s eye twitched. And just like that, a good night had become stressful once again.
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