ACT III - Rena Kogarashi's Life Matters

Different streets, same views.

Such was the ability of my precious hand fan, showing me the sceneries of my snowy, beautiful hometown; and everywhere else I wished to be at that moment...

Ahem. I suppose, before that it would be better to introduce myself first. Rena Kogarashi, you know me already; I'm that one mean desk-neighbor of Yuujin, or whatever he calls me in his recollections. Whether you like me or hate me, I have to take on the narrative, as something immensely terrible happened to him... And I was the direct cause of it. Sigh... Before you point your fingers at me and call me a villain, let me explain my side of things.

As I don't know how much Yuujin talked about me, let me take it straight from the beginning. I'm a 'half', just like him—except, my other side comes from my Mom being Russian. I was born in Russia, too, in a beautiful village surrounded by the most stunning nature one could find on Earth. Biased? Maybe. But I enjoyed an incredible childhood, having many adventures in nearby forests, becoming friends with many animals and enjoying fishing in the nearby lakes. I loved the village, the village loved me, everything was simply magical.

Sure, maybe it was too snowy, but in reality, I never minded it all that much. Learning that each and every snowflake was a unique design of its own, it just made the child me sit and watch the snowfall countless evenings, innocently trying to guess the count of the tiny white particles. My mom had told me that "Humans are just like snowflakes, there's so many of us, yet all of us are unique! Just like how many tiny snowflakes coming together can cover the entire nation in snow, together with your friends you can do the most amazing things! Treasure your friends, yeah?"

And so I did. I got along well with all the kids of the village, but especially with my two best friends: Vika and Mirka. We were an inseparable trio of mischief makers, and our time together was undeniably the best days of my life. That's why, I never wanted them to end, but... Life being life, our ways separated when my dad got a job opportunity in Tokyo that wasn't one to miss. My parents discussed between themselves and decided that it'd be for the best if I experienced my other identity at a young age as well, making us move to Japan at the age of eight.

I didn't take those developments nicely.

My home and my friends were my everything—and leaving them meant the same as the end of the world for me. I cried for weeks, had so many troubles adjusting to the culture (mostly because I refused to accept Tokyo as my new home), went mute when I had to talk Japanese, and only used Russian when I talked with my parents.

Everything was too different than what I had known my entire 8-year life and it was simply unbearable for me. I was taken to so many therapy rooms, finding out that I had developed depression and anxiety. My parents even reconsidered moving back to Russia, but they hoped that this bitter experience would make me more mature in the end. At the same time, my Mom was also struggling to get used to Japan, and my mental state wasn't exactly making her happy either. She fell sick, making us unable to visit Russia even in summertime.

It was only the next summer when she had healed enough to visit, and I had so much hope and excitement to see my best friends again. However, in these two years, I found they had changed a lot. The two had apparently gotten into a fight, so they weren't playing with each other anymore. I felt crushed. Not only they didn't seem one bit happy about me being back for summer, they had asked me to choose a side and stick to it, because they couldn't stand each other.

I tried to get them to make up, but it was a futile attempt. In the end, I chose Vika's side, believing that the two would come together again sooner or later, but all that happened was her treating me colder because of my hesitation, and Mirka completely taking me out of his life because of my decision. This made me realize that what made my hometown such a warm place for me was the presence of my two best friends, but they simply weren't the same people anymore. Being back in town meant nothing when my "home" didn't exist anymore. All that had remained were the memories inside my mind.

I fell harder into depression.

And then, when I went back to Japan, the best, and the worst, thing of my life happened to me: Meeting Tsukumo.

I met him as I was reading in a quiet and peaceful park I frequently visited. I was now very determined about learning to read Japanese properly, so I read books often at that time. Tsukumo had approached me like any good-natured Uncle did, and asked me what I was reading. Then, he took out the beautiful hand fan and started fanning himself. Seeing that I was curious about it, he stopped and showed me the design. The snowy landscape was as gorgeous as my hometown in its prime. He then asked me to think of my best memories, and then, to close my eyes.

It was an easy decision, I knew exactly what my best memories were. My mind started picturing a day where we had seen a deer in the forest with my friends—and the next thing I knew, I was actually in there! The forest, the deer, the laughter of my friends—it was Real! However, with my loud gasp, I was back to sitting on a bench in Japan.

I turned to the mysterious mister for an explanation. Instead, he just said "Alright, think of another!", making me hastily close my eyes and picturing us three taking a nap by the pechka. Once again, with him fanning me, I was inside that very moment, feeling the warmth of the fire and the cuddles of my friends right on my skin. When he ceased the fanning, the moment stopped as well.

He closed off the fan and shook it in front of me, as if it was a treat. "This is a very special hand fan. It can make you relive the best moments of your life. You want this?" I nodded without any hesitation. It was what I needed the most in my life, and I was ready to do anything for it—even for a complete stranger!

"Then, you'll be working for me, Rena-chan."

Go ahead and say that I'm an actual idiot for trusting someone who knew of my name before meeting me. I won't blame you. I didn't know a thing about him, and yet I had agreed in a heartbeat. Then, why was I still working for him all these years, despite me growing in age and being able to make better judgments of people, you ask? Well, I had completely become his doll, doing anything he asked from me—as not doing so would mean the special fan being taken away from me in an instant. The fan had actually helped my mental health tremendously, and that's why I could turn a blind eye to the manipulation. I'd do anything, as long as I could be a child in my beautiful home over, and over again…

Truth be told, I still don't know who (or what) exactly he is. But here's what I know about him—and I promise, I'm not making any of these up.

I wish I did, though. I wish none of this was real, and I had never gotten involved with him…

The man we know as 'Tsukumo' is someone who's been alive for at least two centuries. He is a leech who adds to his life by sucking the memories of people. Memories are extremely strong sources of Power, storing all the love and life energy of their owners. Acquiring a Memory means strength. The more important a memory, the more it means to a person—thus, more vitality is obtained. That's why, Tsukumo travels all around Japan and buys the best antique items, adding to his lifespan with a special method only he knows. Throughout the years, he had many assistants; all of them getting manipulated by his special items, living their most precious moments again and again, falling deeper into madness. And once the assistant died, the item and all its vitality powers would be Tsukumo's. He exploited, and lived on.

And why do I stay with him, despite knowing I'm in this messed up scheme? It's because I'm pretty much addicted to reliving moments. Trust me, I've tried breaking away many times, as Tsukumo himself told me that I was always free to drop the fan off in the shop and leave. That option was always on the table, and he reminded me of it often. But I couldn't. I couldn't.

Even a few days without reliving a moment was too difficult for me. I needed the fan.

So, I kept on working for him, getting my hands dirty with all kinds of filth. I would research about people in weak mental states, giving them the special items made with Tsukumo's Memory-living abilities. Then, I'd watch them fall into insanity and finally, steal back the items, so that Tsukumo could farm the Power accumulated inside.

It was also my job to find any kind of antique auctions, since we still had to front as an actual antique shop, and generate money. When needed, we sold the items that had their Memory-Power completely drained out. Occasionally, thanks to my research, we would get our hands on an item that was abundant in such Power, earning me a hefty amount of 'bonus money'. This made my parents trust him as a 'gentleman who knew how to do business', so they had no issues with me working for him. Plus, my mental health had 'gotten better' and I was 'more outgoing', so it was all the more reason for them to trust him. If only they knew, though…

Bored about listening to my sinful life already? Well, let's cut to the part about Yuujin Seira, then. Just like how my fan was able to get information about people's lives, Tsukumo always made more items that could be used in daily life discreetly, all the while collecting data about more potential sources of Memory-Power. His dragon-cane was such an item, and that was how he was able to get information about me that one fateful day at the park. However, Tsukumo was a greedy man, so he set his mind to create the ultimate item, something that could be wearable at all awake times: a pair of glasses!

Once he was done creating his masterpiece, he had given me a mission to find a suitable carrier for the glasses. Someone who was deeply curious about people's lives—and kind enough to actually want to investigate events and help people out; thus, forming deep bonds with them, generating even more Power? Why, my new classmate Yuujin Seira was the perfect candidate! I mean come on, he even needed a new pair of glasses!

But before I could make a plan on how to manipulate him into visiting the shop, he had stumbled upon the shop himself, causing me great shock. And well, the rest is history. What about what followed after his day at the karaoke cafe, you ask? Since you listened this far, I might as well tell you, I suppose…

Feel free to hate me all you want. I deserve it… For doing all this to the boy I loved.