Circles

       I am starting to get fed up with everything school related. Waking up so early and coming home absolutely wasted. Almost everything we are learning will be useless in the future. I really do miss the summer holidays. Wake up whenever I want and just do not give a damn about anything.

       I know this lifestyle would be hard to pull off without holidays, but still, I would not mind living my life like this. Maybe after some time, I would get bored, but using that free time to find something to pursue sounds much better than counting hours in school.

       Thinking about it really gets me worried about my future. I am being told that I still have some time to find myself, but I feel like I am running out of it. The only positive thing is that today is Friday. Only a few hours divide me from a little rest.

       I don't know why, but in the last few years, I really struggle with school and having enough energy in general. Did I reach the point of age where everything is going downhill? I don't want to believe it, but I can't deny the fact that everything is turning to worse.

       At least I feel that way. Ringing announced the end of school. You could see how everyone is in a hurry to get home or do their stuff. So was I. The struggle, the patient waiting for a little of time without anything to bother me seems to be worth it yet again. Even though it will end very soon and everything will happen again. It feels like I am running in circles.

       Am I making something dramatic out of average school life? Why do I have thoughts like this? Everybody has to go through it. To stop thinking about this pointless and stressful stuff, I took a few imaginary deep breaths and crossed the school's main gate.

       I was walking rather slowly, taking my time because I believe it's good to sometimes don't rush and look at what's around you while you go somewhere. I often notice something I didn't know that was there. But most of the time they are small details, so most people would probably not care at all.

       At home, like usual, I couldn't make myself do anything. I just lied down and did nothing. Ate some food and watched some videos. The night was coming slowly, I was in my bed and suddenly my phone made a noise. It was a sound of a notification that someone messaged me. Who would text me at this time? I picked up my phone and looked who is bothering me this late.

 "Hey, I was wondering if you have time tomorrow?"

       A message from Shara. I wasn't expecting that. The first thing that came to my mind was the whole "she asked me back in school a few days ago". But still I am not sure so I won't mention it. I texted back asking why.

 "Everyone in the class treats me like a princess for some reason, and I can't have a fun and normal conversation with anyone. But when we talked it felt normal... I know it might sound weird, but if you don't want to I won't be mad or anything like that."

       I replied that I am fine with it and we agreed on tomorrow to meet up. I honestly kinda understood her intentions, because other classmates really don't give her a break for some reason. But still, there is that weird feeling in me from all of this. I don't know what we will talk about.