An Unexpected Surprise

I was hoping to see Cody again soon, but I definitely didn't expect to see him standing outside the library. He was leaning against the wall, hood up, surveying the people walking past him. He wore all black today too, with another pair of ripped jeans and the same jacket he’d worn yesterday.

We made eye contact, and I started to wave but then he looked down.

I guess his boots were really fascinating, because he kept staring at them as I approached.

I'm a bit of a magpie myself, so all the shiny buckles on them were a tad mesmerizing, especially when they caught the light as he shifted nervously from one side to the other.

But I prefer to look at his face.

“Hey Cody,” I said, trying to sound casual. I had to stuff my hands into my pockets as I got closer, because I didn’t want him to see how much they were shaking.

And once again, I was so glad that my voice managed to stay steady in spite of the butterflies flurrying around in my stomach.

His eyes stayed downcast, but they looked in my general direction when I spoke. Taking that as his way of acknowledging me, I ventured, “How was the math test?”

“I think it went okay,” he said, so softly. His lips barely moved as he mumbled the words. His lip piercing glinted in the sunlight. So shiny.

Like I said, I’m a magpie.

“Do you want to go over anything today?” I asked, trying to inquire as to why he was standing outside of the library.

Not that I wasn’t happy to see him there. Believe me, I was over the moon.

If I could spend more time with him, I would gladly put off studying for my history test. I really only need a C to pass the class, so it’s fine.

It’s totally fine.

And I’m not just repeating that to convince myself.

Cody shook his head and my heart dropped a little, assuming that he was about to leave. I wanted to reach out to him, to hold him back from walking away. Anything to spend a little more time with him.

“I wanted to pay you back, for your help,” he said, and his cheeks turned red.

Be still my beating heart.

My mouth went so dry that I couldn’t say a single word in response. I just stared at him.

The silence dragged on for a long moment before he finally said, “I-I’m actually really good at history… So I thought that maybe… I could…” I didn’t think it was possible for his voice to get softer, but it somehow petered out mid-sentence, and he stood there, frozen between two words. His bottom lip quivered.

I finally found my voice and jumped in. “I could really use a tutor, actually, and I know the tutoring center is always overbooked, so if you don’t mind…”

Shoot, now I petered out.

At least it proved enough to get the point across, because he nodded.

Without another word, he turned and headed into the library, clinging to the wall as he went. Like he really was trying to become a shadow.

The table we’d sat at yesterday was open, and he went straight for it. Like it was our table already.

I’ve seen too many rom-coms.

Anyway.

He sat at the same side, so I followed suit, being careful where I chucked my backpack today.

True to form, it took my slow brain several moments to realize why he wasn’t moving: this time it was me who needed to pull out my textbook. His Algebra book wouldn’t do us much good, except maybe for calculating how poorly I could do on the test and still pass the class.

Yes, I’ve really wasted time in calculating that.

(I only need a 72/100 to pass, by the way.)

I'd slipped the study guide in between Chapters 11 and 12 yesterday, and hadn’t touched it since, having completely neglected to study last night. My short attention span had been focused on replaying the tutoring session and coming up with a dozen things I could've said.

All of which I conveniently forgot now.

As one does.

Thank god for the study guide distracting us from needing to speak. Cody pulled it over to his side of the table and skimmed it, flipping page after page in only seconds.

When he’d finished that, he wasted no time in pulling out a thick stack of index cards and separating them into smaller piles.

“I use flashcards to study for tests,” he said quietly, pushing the index cards and a pencil towards me. He flipped back to the first page, then, turning the guide around to me, asked, “What’s the hardest thing for you to remember?”

“Names, dates, and events,” I said, listing everything that made history, well, history.

He lifted an eyebrow but not his gaze. “We’re gonna need a lot more flashcards then.” And I saw a hint of a smile at the corner of his lips.

That is the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. All I want is to make him smile. I want to keep that smile on his face all the time.

But it disappeared all too fast, and he was back to being serious in an instant.

Cody divided the study guide and told me to write down whatever I thought was important onto individual flashcards, and that he would help me weed some out later.

He finished the second half of the study guide in half the time it took me to finish my half. By the time I finished, an hour had already passed.

On the bright side, he only tossed out a third of my notecards.

“You can usually get away with only memorizing the big picture, not all the minute details. Focus on the more important people and what they did first, then figure out how the lesser known historical figures relate to them. Connecting people usually helps me remember them altogether, instead of trying to separate them.”

“That’s amazing.”

I wish I’d said that.

I’d meant to say that.

My brain told me to say that.

Instead it came out as, “You’re amazing.”

Talk about a Freudian slip to ruin the moment.

Cody instantly clammed up, pulling his hands under the table and dropping his chin to his chest. His face was completely hidden from my view by the hood he insisted on keeping up.

Thanks, mouth. You had one job.

“Um.” And now I failed to speak at all. “Uh…” Another false start, and the burning heat in my face only intensified. If I got any hotter, I think I’d burst into flames.

“Boy, all this studying sure makes me thirsty.” Probably only the second-worst thing that could come out of my mouth today. “I’ll go get us some drinks.”

At least my legs did their job, and helped me stand up and walk out of the library. A little awkwardly, and I stumbled at the entrance, but close enough.

The nearest vending machine was in the next building, and it only held water and Gatorade. Only the yellow one remained. Not knowing what he would prefer, I bought both and walked back slowly, taking a little time to cool myself down.

I guess I took too much time, because by the time I returned to our table, Cody and his backpack were gone. Only the study guide and a neat stack of flashcards remained to prove he’d been there.

I plopped both drinks on the table, sat down, and sighed.

Way to blow it, Andrew. Way to blow it.